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you read those books where they build girl angels in laboratories
who fall in love with lonely boys.

you like hearing your poems
read back to you in english accents
and you like your accents
licking on your poems
because, if I recall,  you’re heart-broken
--no I haven’t forgotten,
yes I remember, you were the
curvaceous queen of unskinned knees;
I was ****** in jeans.
you got partway through Swann’s Way,
but gave up last November,
when I was hitting walls hard.
the last words  you read were the last
on your mind, “Happiness is beneficial for the body--”
and you stopped, that was fine enough
for a tattoo. (happy needle,
breast imbrue)
Well grief taught me, grief bought me,
and I was hitting walls hard.
But straight back  for you,  to boys kissing boys
and  you’re too old for toys  and
you think it’s pathetic
how girls go to get it
with silicon and plastic
oh go on, tell me how
you’re a heart-breaker, ha,
because you showed them
your *******, like an angel.

you like to remind me how skinny you are now,
and you still love to dance.

There is no equivalent factory making boy angels.
This feels like trash, but here we are anyway.
They don’t make cards for us
Pre-made poems with cartoon animals
Telling jokes that aren’t actually funny
But we still laugh, because, yeah, that’s just like us

Candy hearts never say ‘we love you’
Or ‘I love you both’ or ‘be ours’
Matching rings aren’t sold in threes
Puzzle-heart necklaces are split down the middle
For him and her and
What about me?

Ours is not a Hallmark love
With two hands clasped and fingers meshing
But we still walk together
Hand in hand in hand
And I hold hers behind your back
And we lie together
Like a row of knocked over dominoes
Three people no longer bothered
By the strange stares and confused glances
Because what we have is better than that

So who cares if they don’t make cards for us
I’ll make one myself
With a puzzle heart on the front
Broken into three
Drawn in three strange colors
That people wouldn’t normally put together
But that, when combined, become something beautiful
And I’ll laugh, because, yeah, that’s just like us.
Wrapped up in red
and tied with silver
a small painting
you made in school

Given with a smile
and a whole lot of love
Van Gogh's Sunflowers
don't hold a torch to this

I may not be a mother
nor a sister
nor an aunt
I may not have family to visit

But ...

7 years old
you prove so well
that family do not have
to share blood
©Jacqueline Le Sueur 2012 All Rights Reserved
 Dec 2011 Arianna Anderson
JL
I laugh
At my
Pistol-whipped
Forehead
Bleeding in the sunset
You have no Ideas
Of my yearning
-Your saynothings-
Say everything
-Your longlookings-
Tear holes in me
Your breathy eyes
Are long awaited
By someone like
Me
Your someone I know
Who sat across from me
In a basement
Who laughed with me
Rollecoastering
All the while not knowing
Your smile Is warmer than any sunset
Even this one
I look at longingly
I know tonight you will kiss the neck of another
Wrapped In the poison arms of another
While I nurse this forehead of mine
This broken heart of mine
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