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 Nov 2013 Ari White
Clare
do you ever
sit in your shower
knees curled up
head in your hands
and forget who you are?

do you
put your hair up
turn the water
as hot as it will go
and sit below it?

do you sit there
and listen
to the drops of water
drumming
lightly
burning
until you've evaporated?
And that night I was a mechanical doll
and I turned right and left, to all sides
and I fell on my face and broke to bits,
and they tried to put me together with skillful hands
And then I went back to being a correct doll
and all my manners were studied and compliant.
But by then I was a different kind of doll
like a wounded twig hanging by a tendril.
And then I went to dance at a ball,
but they left me in the company of cats and dogs
even though all my steps were measured and patterned.
And I had golden hair and I had blue eyes
and I had a dress the color of the flowers in the garden
and I had a straw hat decorated with a cherry.



Translated from the original Hebrew by Karen Alkalay-Gut.

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