apathy: Favorites

Dec 2013 apathy

maybella snow

i was in one of my horrible ******
suicidal moods, that I seem to
have more often than not
and although I took all my anger
and pain, out on him, he wasn't
angry or upset. he simply said
"I love you, it's all okay,
I need to sleep, I'm not upset,
I'll talk to you in the
morning love."

and I wonder
how he can
love me
and how I
don't deserve it

Dec 2013 apathy

don't mourn the fact I'm dead

Dec 2013 apathy

maybella snow

don't mourn the fact I'm dead

dying alone isn't as scary as I thought it would be
bye x

I'm sorry

Dec 2013 apathy

my pillow smells like you

Dec 2013 apathy

maybella snow

my pillow smells like you

find yourself
    lost in me

  dig yourself
                   the hole
you dug me

drag yourself
away from the
flames
of my heart

Dec 2013 apathy

when you lay in bed vulnerable

Dec 2013 apathy

maybella snow

when you lay in bed vulnerable

I'm doubting you again
are you truly the man
I first met. or were you never
the man I thought you were
your eyes did trickery
on my heart
and I lost myself
in the folds of your hugs
maybe your smell
deceived me
with a hint of musk
to hide the blood
bleach doesn't help
stains on skin
maybe you never were real
and I'm just a fleeting
moment and thought
of lust
never love

Dec 2013 apathy

cotton souls

Dec 2013 apathy

maybella snow

cotton souls

it has been a few days
since I have felt the
pleasure of pain
and oh how I
miss that sting
rush of adrenaline
a wide awakening
and harsh coloring
but oh how I
miss that sting

blood bleeds red
just as my heart beats
dead

Dec 2013 apathy

Well, The Well Was Full.

Dec 2013 apathy

AJ

Well, The Well Was Full.

I think I actually try not to be toxic
Try not to be tragic
Try not to be destructive,
Along with its sub category
Self-destructive.

I just do not excel
In trying to feel mollified.
Though I've tried.

I like to drink the waters of insanity.
I can't steer from temptation,
Especially not if it's harmful.
It'll get me killed one day,
I'm sure of it.

After all, Jack and Jill fell down the hill,
And now Jack's in a box
Six feet under.

Dec 2013 apathy

Valor, Laurel, Courage, Honor

Dec 2013 apathy

AJ

Valor, Laurel, Courage, Honor

I'm sorry, really.
It's just getting very cold.
I want to let go.