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A N Sweet Jun 2010
i am certain that i am
and that i am certainly ((not))
who i think i am.
but i wish i could be who i was.
*then
A N Sweet Jun 2010
we sat down and talked last night
beer buzzed and campy,
letting the smell of the fire penetrate
your sweatshirt (which you would lend to me)
and my hair (which you would later caress)
and we floated in our remember-when's and remember-who's.

i remember when
i remember who
me and you
when we were timid and we were shy
and the first time we met, it was with our eyes
i saw a green that stopped me in my tracks
because even at the naive age of five, i knew that it was the same green
as the onion grass in my backyard which
when spring came we always tasted
and always hated
*how it lingered even after we had our apple juice and snacks
A N Sweet Jun 2010
pullin' on my heart strings
feelin' like a bee sting
it was such a little thing
but the feeling was big.
A N Sweet Jun 2010
i am a soul
which exists to exist.
but exist is such an understatement.
in truth, i exist to live & to live fully.
to taste joy & swallow sadness & let anger boil
and to pepper the world with my expression.
i want to touch the colors of the world and feel the cool blues and the warm reds
and let the purples sooth and caress and drip from me
& leave a pattern in my path.
A N Sweet Jun 2010
i opened the door
and crawled through the window
past your eyes
and into your soul
and i walked around
and i sat down
and i breathed you in
(inhaled so so deeply)
and i lied down
and i rolled around
and i cuddled with your whispers
and i tasted your sweetness
and i felt your smile
(a light so so warm)
and i absorbed it all
and i fell in love with it all
and i wrote it down
and now it is eternal.
you’re eternal
in my words
on a page
inside my notebook
inside my heart.
you are so absolutely lovely it drives me bonkers.
i love it when i see you. i love it when i look into your eyes.  i love that when you smile at me, you smile with your eyes.  it's like you're smiling with your soul.  that's how i feel.  i know you'll be leaving me soon and i'm not really okay with that.  i wish i could roll around in your soul forever and wrap it around me like a blanket and feel safe and loved and sit there and whisper with you for eternity.
at least on paper, you're eternal.  our moments are eternal. at least on paper.
A N Sweet Jun 2010
waiting.
this is the kind of vicious silence that makes my stomach scream.
the hands of the clock claw at its own face,
as if to move on would excruciate, lead to self-destruct
time is forced; the minutes drag, kicking & screaming
and you say nothing.
my eyes burn, staring, pleading your mouth to move,
waiting in agony for your lips to quiver
in hopes that a sweet wind from your breath would pass through and destroy the quiet,
a quiet which is not entirely unlike being deaf,
except i can hear my own worried breaths which beckon you to speak.
A N Sweet Jun 2010
childhood is so undeniably attractive
in youth, with eyes like hearts because we perceived with our hearts
and minds filled with stars and naivete; captivated by nuance yet aroused by simplicity
speaking in dreams and romance,
living freely, boldly, and fictitiously in some elders' disregarded reality.
and we remember such, in fleeting hope
that our greying eyes may see in spectrum once again.
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