I can feel the blackness coming
My Christmas ghost of past
Fake smiles all gone
I had it
No laughter
Gone the blast

No presents for a tree not cut
Or dinner for no guests
A lonely morning wakes for me
Just like it
All the rest

I wonder could I be more down
Would money make me laugh
Baa humbug to the happy crowd
A bottle comes
My drowning friend

And in my haze I call my mind
From times so long in past
When we all sat and laughed a lot
sang hymns from long ago
When we all wrote how good we'd been
The sack lay at our beds
The opening of the 4am
Woke parents from those zzzz's

This Christmas day my head all high
On smells from dinners feast
A place so full of papers ripped
No carpet at our feet
When grandad came with so much more we wooed
At grandmas smile
A time when all the family called
That was my Christmas smile

Now here I lay in bed I stay
My head been on the rocks
The house is
cold
All lonely now
The candles fizzed away
No cards just
dust
My memories
bust
It's just another day

All that becomes my future
passes me by in a blaze of glory

You couldn't see my sadness
All hidden from the show
A heart that gave up singing
Shameless.....
I
Know

The ache in my eyes showed no end
Wicked be my life
A meaning from no beginning
A start from no end
I lower my face
To a pavement not dry

So my life ends with
Been a nice day !!
Oh yes been quite pleasant  
The second swallow from the third drink
Shows my disdain
In my pity upon my fellow
As their time ticks away
The room of the dead
Await them

Well I'll walk away
Dry my eyes
Breath the air
And leave them in their wallow
Happiness
Comes
Life lives
And my end ..???

I hear the music play
And I smile
With a sound from a years gone past
My heart warms
And I smile
......................
How the crackled fire plays
From a time of yesterday
I see you there watching me
Loving me
Holding me
A mothers look
A care behold
My life in her love

Such a shame she cut me
Hurt the very me
Burned my own existence
Scorched this soul
Scarred for a generation
Left me
Cold

What could I have been
Now
Then
Would I have life
Bore from a kindness
Alas I will never want
To know

For now she is gone and my eyes hurt
A little less
Now I have a love
that loves me as I love her  
For she knows and See's my pain
She is there for me
She is my life

The sonnet in my head bears no resemblance to the
Letters from my lips
For my eyes in this darkness sing
So sweetly of these days
A day when the moon lights the sun
And my heart beats to the rhythm
From the stars

My love how you move me
Like no other in this life
From your lips comes my pleasure
In the silence that you speak
Please sing to me that sweet sweet music
As you walk by my side  

Your hand feels so gentle as we waltz
Through the garden of my Eden  
In the eve of our night  
My desire full on empty
This unrequited love

One day when you see me
For all I am now
The heavens will become us
True love be it born
Let the stars sing out our glory
Amare