So secrets will sell souls if sold
Don’t barter your secrets for souls
A simple quote could ruin a life for good
You should look into yourself for gold
And lock them up for golden souls
You will know them when you feel it
You will feel them move in you
Just like the whispering one
With the ghostly face
Oh her ghostly face…
It haunts my nights while I try,
To sleep is to die every night
I don’t sleep.
So therefore will I not die?
Does that make me vulnerable to the light?
Would I only be able to live at night?
I would hope that she would guide me through
(To the other side)
To die is to sleep for life
So sing don’t lie, just sing and if you cry
Then you know it’s from your heart
I will live in your heart
I want to sleep through the dark
I want you to die here in my arms
Will you cover the ground, with your love all around?
Can we go back and forth?
From the times in between
These fading memories of mine
No more answers remain in these questions
I want to go back to last night
Back in the whirlwind that was the light
Do you remember the dreams we had during the fights?
Oh I think I’m alone in here
I’m pretty sure I’m done with this
She is killing me.

A silence broken through memories.
Her seraphic voice called out;
“My friend, where have you been?”
We both have been through the mystery.
Now that the sour years have passed
Our splintered souls can swell again.

A shift in evidence.
The most gentle sound struck through the chaos.

The strangest of sounds around
Sights unwound into a tornado of pure filth
Is this what its all about?
The money, the attention
Grounded beyond the all of this guilt
I wonder if I should go out there. . .

Take the plunge, make the fall
Are you strong enough to withstand the time?
Are you willing to answer the call?

I know that,
They don't understand my face
It brings back the demons that they've tried to replace.
The wasted nights spent drowning in this rotten place.
Trust that the words that I've said, are not a true waste.

It's all about the darkness, the real evil inside.

Could you find the way?
Could you get the time?

I always have this feeling.
That there are these following
Eyes always on my back
Or on the top of my head
Or in my black blood. . .
Do you know what I mean?
It is in a sense, comforting?
And completely sickening all at
Once and I have nothing left
To speak at all.

But one time, sometime ago
I felt a strange relief.
No more eyes on the back
Of my head or your head on my
Spiny back; crooked teeth
Straightened back out
By the cold streets
Of those bizarre,
              ******,
and draining
cities.

Saint Pete, Oh Saint Peter!
Where are you now?
Your smooth shadiness and weird wilderness
Covered up my sins but only for a little bit
A moment in a movement inward
Inside my lungs, I breathe you in
I’m going outside and out of my mind
They forgive me for my sins. . .
But, I still love you.

Saint Augustine, Saint Augustine!
I will be back to you
I will let your silly green water
Take me in and bring me home
I’ve been too far gone for far too long
Sliding around the other stars in this galaxy
Seeing the inside of some strange girls
In the complete capture of a crutch coma
I let you go. . .
But, I still love you.

I thank you both,
(True Gentlemen)
(Wicked Women)
For your hands

They were there
(For Strength)
(For Shade)
To cover the curse

Of these
(Dying)
(Lying)
Eyes

Just wait on time
I'll wait in line
Call me down
Bring this through
Shot eight down
Last one made you
First and last time
You say you care now
Just give me seven minutes
And we will scream this out
You say it is
My last time
To forgive and forget this
I'll start ****
Just so you'll give me
Another seven minutes
To rewrite this
And you could
Make a good list
Of all the things you hate about me
My charm is your weakness
I am all you need
Forget about it
I won't
Give you another seven minutes
Tonight
I'll lie again
My fight
Is you in my sight
Let's begin again.
She says...

I often enjoy being off of the ground.
The feeling of having no control
Is exhilarating and tormenting
All at once, we all could be gone at once
Like a kiss or a whisper back to her
In the purple veil of the night that stirs
All the colours of our lives together
Then brings us back

Up the mountain is a hurried curled breeze
and I'm shaking, still
The cable car is off the rails
And my ears pop as I get closer away
Farther today than yesterday, okay.

So I like to see the other women smile
Back at me like a soft Medusa
It's like an ice cube on the asphalt
That never freezes or melts
Too close to or to close the school.
Down the walkway where her eyes close
The door that opens and I walk out
With the invisible monsters on my bag
On the saddest, red day of my life
I still somehow stole a smile from her
Face me and taze me with your torpedo *******
Then let me go home

Make the light fade from the eight by twelve inch
Picture frame of the world
That moves and moves faster than you can't see
Believe the memo, believe
The note inside your mind says it all
It says. . .

       "Please don't go,
         I'll eat you whole."

Again and again
We run out of words to lend out
Of love and death above
The tomb is red and I'm finally done
With this

My last poem. . .
Oh ****!
Do you feel it?
I'm almost home. . .

        Nevermind. . .

Yeah, there is a real shiver
Silver sliver of cold medicine
Made it so bitter to swallow
This headache down and up

The rocking chair rots in the sky
Lay down, lay down
Goodbye.
Goodnight.

Have I gone too far?
I know I missed the curve
miles ago. . .

But how far have I gone?
The question with an answer
that has no meaning.

Was the question even worth asking?
Every ending must have a beginning,
but every ending must never start over again.

How have I become this man?
From a quarter century's worth
of a lifetime time lived in colorful
exasperations.

There isn't anymore questions
that I can ask myself with this solid lividity in my face.
All I know is that nothing is the same.

Each day just gets more and more strange.
It fills me up with this central gasp
Of the nostalgic grasp of yesteryear.

I've needed this flow
This current illusion of pain
I've watched it all go down
I've felt it all change.

I know what tomorrow will bring
The same thing but with a little more sting.

This is a spoken accident
I can't
I won't
Lose you again
I've said it before
and the **** of it all
Is I still can't remember them
The last time I left
I got stuck in a rut
In a solid state of seclusion
A twisted knuckle
In the seams

You can't go there again
Don't do this

I shed a body or two off
Back when I was in the "Times."

The speckling of my sharpest bones
Was in order
and I still didn't want to go home.
I just wanted to shine.
I just wanted to live like ivory
and dance in the minty ice cream cone
That's melting down your left wrist.

While in the other hand there was this little slip
A piece of paper with a note
About how God can change your life and
Others lives if you can just pray right
and then pay the standing Black Jack off by the closed door.
Would you like anymore
Wisdom from an ******* of grass
Or the company of a church *****?

I want to shed roses out of the garden
and into my mind.
I just want to tell you that you're not mine
and you never will be and
I will never be happy again
Not like I was when
I had no hidden grin
Or when I had no scar on my chest from beating him
Or any manly hair on my chinny chin chin.

I've shined out and timed out of the server.
The service calls me so
I put a gun in my mouth
and sing them the anthem of their nations glow:

The anthem of a lunatic
Praying on a twelve gauge
To bring me back in again.

Bruised teeth and busted lips.

A black smudge down the right side
And your **** are looking back at me.
To make things a little bit harder,

I almost stopped to shudder and erase that last part but I can't now
For it has made its mark.

Trash can journey number six.
Are you in to this?

She turned as blue
as the sky
as I
watched
the other ones eyes
turn as black
as the night
that surrounded us
in that strange hour
of mystery and chance.

Panic arose
as she took
one shallow breath
after the other.

I swallowed fear
like the caps that
I had earlier
and earlier
in that night,

I almost took
the other one
with
the black ******
eyes
around for some
one on one sight.

But it seemed
as if time
had jumped back
seven years
and carried me
away from her
again.

As a fist fight
carried on
in the back,
it’s as if
this time
it was stuck
on repeat.

My eyes stretched
back and forth
to try and expand
my horrible horizon tonight
to try and make sense
of these overwhelming sights
that haunt my harried life.

All I wanted
was
to make them
happy.

How everything
can go so wrong
In just the flick
of the lights.

He awoke in the morning. The sheet had made its way to the end of the bed. Stuffed in the corner of the side that he didn’t sleep on, no one had in months. He didn’t care much anymore. The scent had faded. It was nothing but diamonds and dust at this point. As he drug himself out of bed, his mind rushed back towards what his reasoning was for coming to this side of the world. What was he escaping? What had he left back in the land of his last home? Daughters... diamonds? Dust... there was nothing left there. They were all in their place. I needn’t not to go back, he thought. I believe that’s how, he thought. The world wasn’t the same anymore. He needed this trip, this experience, this last adventure. One last adventure, he thought. *******. It’s good enough to make a man weep. When was the last time I cried? It’d been years. Or was it months? Either way... this was the place.

He walked to the door and looked across the beautiful country he was beside. He was beside himself in the mirror of the world. This cigarette tastes good, he thought. I think I’ll have another cup of coffee. Maybe a bowl or two. One for you, Mother Nature. That’s the least he could do for allowing her to let him inside this warm early summer morning.

As the day carried on, the thought hadn’t left his mind, everything seemed to taste better, smell better, the sky was a different kind of blue. The flowers were almost singing to him. Why, he thought. Is my luck beginning today? It was a sign that he was not alone anymore. The sky had opened. The clouds had cleared. It was all in time.

I think I’ll take a nap. The solution to a never ending problem. I’m always tired these days, he thought. I’ve worked enough in this life for seven. I wonder if it would be enough to get me into heaven. It’s a good question.

Thoughts drift into dreams and he was alone in this room now.

“Beau! Beau! Hey Beau!”

He heard a voice cry out of the darkness. It sounded like his brothers, or his fathers. But his father didn’t call him Beau. How did he know? The voice called out again.

“Come here, man. I need to talk with you.”

He followed languidly down the hall.

“Where are you?” He called out.

Just a little bit further. He felt the wind blow softly through his hair. Where was this voice? Where was this force? The force that made me come here. The force that put my hand in line. The force that calls out my name. It was there,just on the other side. He was ready. This was the last great adventure. He wept. His eyes began to light up with a light like never before. Never seen again. He was there.

He awoke in the morning and had been born again into the night. Burning in the ever living light of love.

To remain in history forever.

A legend.

Follow me down to the water
Fill your heart with hate
Throw down everything you love
Never forget this day

It’s the one that came to be known
As the darkest one of them all
The worried and sick will be the first to go
All of the materialistic objects will be next to fall
All of your weapons and strong hands
Cannot stop what is coming to us all
To all the ones who have claimed to have known this
You will finally get what’s coming to you
To the ones that never gave a care
I’ll be sure and meet you there soon
Standing on a beach on the east coast
We stand waiting together for a sign of the lost hope

Mother Nature, take back what’s yours
Leave the ones who ****** you to burn, burn
Burn away all of the time that was bought
Let the money drift away in the ashes
From the hands of the Father

The last ghost to come home
You will be forever lost now
It’s time to move on

Will you follow me down?
When did you lose your love?
Did you save up all the hate?
To deliver it to the one above. . .

You have seen this coming.
Have you seen Him?

This is it

Little by little

It has become what it is today

A common demon

                             lurking

******* up what I perceive as real

But what are you?

Do you get grouped into that theory?



Make believe

                     the present future day passed by me

…………………………………………………………………………..

Although I put cracks in the ground where I step

I carry no weight that a man could not get

Many different times I wonder                 about it

                                                    not worry

            Just looking down upon my feet

                              breaking

                   ­                my

                                bones



                                   no.



alone                                                          ­       with her

           with her                                       alone



                                  yes.



Smile kid you’re almost home

          Pick your head off the floor

                         Take the **** of the fact

                                    That you won’t see them anymore



  I almost made the mistake of dying to soon

          But my soul has a heartbeat of its own

Shook me still when I was awake but ******

       The river flows and carries me slowly on



Downstream,

                           Life’s changing,

                                                      ­   Deep breathing,

                           Gone from it all,

I’m going home.

Where are the meanings?
Who were they writing about on the walls inside their minds?
When was I gonna go home?

No more worries about what tomorrow will bring.
No longer forgetting where I came from.
Will the prolonged status of my arrival bring life again?
My man, my friend.

Were the mistakes I made all a part of my re birth?
When I fell off and came back down and then got so high, so high with you girl.
I found God.

So breathe in, breathe in,
Hold it inside and never let it die.
So smile now, smile now.
I'm on my way to a perfect life with this happiness and the angel mist that blooms around my insides, so bliss.

Remember me now for always and forever
I'm always speaking of forever as if I know it like a friend
But I do not
I know not of the future aspects or present accidents.
I wonder if they'll be okay with this or be alright with the mist the blows about my insides.
Probably not though...

But I'm okay with it
I'll be alright soon enough
Outside the world of the freakish ghouls and snake eaters.
I will **** them with my hands and fists and knives of glory, of ******, glorious, holy fury.
How long will I withstand this hurried worried mighty angry misunderstood feeling.
The longest night, the shortest day
Will it be long?
Before long, yes.

I wish I could write you a poem
Every day of your life
Every moment that you smile
Or in the rare times that you cry

I wish I could kiss your lips of cherry
And hold your hands of pine
I would love to hear the voice of Carrie
Pass through these open ears of mine

I also wish to carry your struggles
As far as my broken back can bear
As long as I could lie back in the field of love
To feel your ways pass through my ***** hair

Completely catastrophic
The distance that is
Almost forgot what my name is
But I never could have lost it

Fall through the barstool
Oh the way I look at you
I knew you felt the cool black eyes
Appearing and disappearing all over you

I want to write you a poem
Every time you lie
To help you gain a new outlook
on this thing called life

So remember the words that I say to you
I will always write these poems
Because
I love you, too.

Awake.
And then I was there
Back in the real world
With no one left to see
Or any stories yet to be told.
I was a lost soul again
Wondering about, wandering about
I would love to take off again
To seek her out in this wicked land
But I want to go back to my old life
When I knew nothing of her
And the evils behind those green eyes
Oh how I despise
This new ******* life
Without innocence
And a brand new sense
The sense to look in, get in
Love long and destroy
That's my pitiful story
To take on your burdens
And swim through the oceans
That my mind can't seem to swallow
I just want to follow you down
But it gets me so down,
Now I see that...
I want to go back to my young life.
With my naïve eyes closing
When the world says to lie.
I will still live, when the world says die.
I will continue to swim, with the worst things in life
Wrapping around my neck.
They are ripping up my shoulders
And drinking my blood through a straw.

Totally useless
Infinite universe
Exploding before us
I am one
I am holy
I am yours
The one and only
Forever and glowing
So steady in stirring
The moving of your heart
Melting your spirit
Confusing what is real
Abusing all you feel
Lie to their faces
Sigh no more
Sink the places
That you have since forgotten
This is a place that I
Will not forget
The holy sighs and cries
During your pitiful lies
All because you set aside
The energy at rest

Hello there

Welcome back
Get this drink
Of A’s exile elixir

Go off to a distant land
Find a distant face


Nothing can be said
I did you wrong
You ****** me over
This is goodbye


......|……|XXXXXXX


Undress
Unleash the emptiness
I’m so glad that I brought this
This beautiful red safe
The keeper of
My ****** up mental state
About my mental state…
Don’t ask me about my holy stake
That I pierced into the heart
Of a special white vampire
One of those holier than thou types
One **** up
And then
Onto the next line
The next word that you speak
Might be a mistake
What do you think?
About me…
Do you think that you could
Stand on your own two feet?
With me,
Without me.
Alone like we are
I’ll crash the car
To flip our worlds around

Venture away today
Go away
Come as you were
Another day
But not today
You might be okay

I’m not okay…





Holy one
Grant me a kiss of happiness
You know I need it
I need her
Whoever she is
Wherever I am
Someway, somehow
I’ll find the day
To rewind the times
That I forgot about
Last night, this morning
Last year, good mourning
Thank you that this is over with. . .

Oh, sweet angel
Lie to me
Allow my words
To feed the hungry minds
of those that don’t listen
and only want my body.

What about what’s left of my spirit
Dragging down below

Sing to those that need
Lie to those that see nothing
Around no quarter
The moon found you
I found you
The numbers did add up
Just a little too soon

All too soon
I found you
I lost you
I’ll find you again

Forget about the end.

I know that this mind
This wicked and ****** up mind
Will sink farther than yours
Under the waves of the graves
That has been opened up before me
and your once perfect thoughts
If there is even such a thing
I’m sure you thought that
Wear the skin of the corpses
That have followed you downtown
Into the ****** streets of that town
Into the ****** streets of Saint Augustine
or Saint Petersburg or Gainesville, Florida
I wonder which one I’ll burn away first
In the ******* emptiness of my heart
Thank you, for beginning the start of my madness
Oh well, I’m not sure if it was you that pushed it off
I think it was the sick sadness of world that has turned me on
The rush I get when I write these words
The worse words that connect and form verses
That will infect the simplest things that once were the simplest things
Before us, but are now just lies and memories
Dead men tell no tales.

So let the world continue without ever believing that we were real
Keep on telling yourself that the past should stay dead
Because it will, unless you **** me…

And I swear I’ll haunt you.
Infinity.

I've spent many a night
In a sort of weird conception
Under the wicked wing
Of some what would be angel.
With my only eye stuck on the
Lover of satan and witches brew.

I couldn't remember the rest
Of what I was going say.

I felt a sigh come over
Like a knife in my back
I stuck it out for two more weeks
and then spun out of control.

Oh what a little devil she was!

Her ice eyes set my soul afire
Completely, like a liar
Formed from a chimera
In your self made heaven.

Like soldiers in a row,
Sold like ducks on a pond.

A sly gesture at what would be all mine
In the sure ticking time to come.

I have welcomed you back, my love
Welcome back to hell.

I issued a fair warning to the call-man
On the watchtower, I told him
          “Would you believe this if I told you?”
          “You tell him that I am coming for him!”
          “. . . and there will be more than hell to pay. . .”

More than I could have ever dreamed. . .
His blood is my blood
&
My blood is his.
I will drown in it one day.

He walks slowly into the center of my vision.
I smell a false sense of fear,
Was it I or him that reeked of this
Blurred illusion of what we both shook from?
I heard a child’s laughter in the fog (again)
Was it I or him that brought this
Old demon back in?
I saw a trembling hand raise
As the fire blazed in and out
A knife became shape (again)
Was it I or him that first reckoned this
Evil deed of sin?
I felt the blade slide in (again)
Was it I or him that took this
Task, this burden, this dream
And crafted it into our own ****** up reality
The blood was thick on the ground
I taste that old familiar taste
That ironic, irony, iron taste . . . old blood
But again, was it I or him that began
To sink not swim into this
River of blood?

My throat is fully coated in iron
(Steal diamonds and gold)
From that nightmare/dream
And I lie here in my bed and think back
To “where the **** is my coat?’

Am I just a pawn
Yet to be
Played out?

I see the eyes that see mine
and I feel their strange smiles
Creep up and down
The edge of my crooked spine

Could you get the time?
(Even if you knew it)
To look at me, not through me
(Now is your chance to prove it)

Show me what you're worth
Are you worth it?

Am I?

This is just completely unnatural
A force of nature
That is just completely unreal
For my heart to cure

Brown, black, yellow and red
My heads are on fire
With the unknown problems
That I hold and I hold
A ring full of broken keys
I wonder which doors they will open

For me,

My body just can't seem to get enough
Of their lovely poison.

The crooked legs of a girl lost in the wilderness of my black eyes
Gathered up all the information needed to even begin to write down
The true meaning behind me and the truth behind these untold lies.

I'm all wrapped up yet;
Somewhat deflated
In this violent accordion like
Room with that old red chair
In the left side of my sight

I am a bow, slowly eating snow
Flakes, down the strings of this
Broken fiddle in the middle of
My shaken and scarred,
Shattered yet calm hand.

Beyond my lucky star
Lies the remains of the reasons
From out of this empty bottle
The words that I need to write
Are the answers to my mental problems

But I answer to no one
No I do not!
I follow my own toes
and I knows that my nose
Knows that smell, the smell

Of her blood.
The veins extrude and
Fiercely scream out
Of her soft neck
and little thighs

There is no more
Apple juice
That's okay I like
Lemonade
Anyways,

A little cut in my eye
Bleeds out sour blood,
it's an interesting thing

To save some middle time
I will skip around a little more
In this giant sun of a life
I'll find my body song
One day seven

She can get into my lightning
and see life. . . AH!
So much more
It's like heaven trapped in a bell jar

Drink it up and have a look around your confusing world

Need I say more?
I like you
But only a little bit

Can you show me anymore
Than this?

It’s about time to say this out loud

Scream to me, scream to me now

I wonder if, I wonder how

This could ever make any since
To anyone that may read this
Or try and grasp the sense

Of my words through the font on the page

Like the letters that will never be sent
Or the last kiss that won’t be given
And the sin in the whisper of the ghost
That left me smitten, for her

I want to disappear into your eyes
Lose them with my song to the sky

Lay down in a lost city of gold
Somewhere out there in her forest of old
I’m cold, I’m so cold

Let’s lose the snow and find the sun
Run, run with me
        RUN

Can you stand to be outside the lines they draw?
I don’t think I’ve ever been there before
Or in their common dream of a star

The last lines that could be drawn, would be

If I could just draw you a picture
That would show you my face

I would wonder if I would be remembered
Or just be replaced

With other memories of a lost soul
Was that the meaning or the goal?
Where are the words to be sold?

Not before your eyes
Like the tears from the sky

They will never fall again
Like they did that night
They will never fall in love
Like I did that night

I am open now
The panic ran all around me
But I still remained calm
With the thought of a hint
That I should have questioned sooner

There are too many things to blurt out
In hopes of making you smile

In stripes of golden feathers
I must not let the black ones in
Their legs shaking me off
Every which way and that
****** me off
Snuffed me out

I pulled away from you
Just to see what you could do
Alone in the same way that
You put me there
With all the love still fresh off the bone

Bring all of my fans and their bottles
You will need my blood remember?

You shouldn't have asked
With the last few remaining breaths
That lay curdled up on my chest
The greatest fear had left me
I am closed now

Destroy and enjoy the meanings that are unknown.

I heard a waterfall crashing down suddenly
It was wrapped around a restless picnic of sorrow
Tears were shed for the boy that went missing ahead of the morning dew
The mourning shade often covers the vast array of lies in a lover’s last verse
And it loves to embrace the ends of the message unspoken.
Although salvation bleeds upon the reasons;
The smells moving cannot flow wild enough into the sinking reasons that are unknown
And the insane fragile moments release a certain fury,
That the tides cannot unleash in such a hurry!
The heavy load of mistakes in your overflowing mind
Must carry like the mist that flows through a vacant lot of bad luck.

God bless this atmosphere that I am trapped under
Like a rock stuck in a plain circle.
I chose to forget the waters that once made me so happy.
I got so far away from the numbing sounds that tried their best to **** the sadness,
Just so I could see if I could actually do it on my own. . . and you know how I listen so well.
You took the words right out of my mouth.

In this tight turning hour of chance
Strangers hold these sayings
That are stuck like four minutes for four minutes after eleven seven PM
And this gives me a stumbling southern draw that could collapse suddenly
In the sleeping yet impending doom that is waiting patiently outside of your mind.
I’m watching the shell to see if it fits or breaks when moved near the bear in the room
That would refuse the birds so violently yet greet and guide the ***** burnt sweat-stain
From the other side of the tracks edge inside for a cup of your finest tea.

Their ability to fail doesn’t worry me, so I climb to the top of the fights in the tree limbs.
All the while buzzing and shaking the bay that abused me
and stripped me naked in those tattered streets.

Hit rewind and get back to the obvious yet sudden shock
When women appeared softly
Then ripped the lovely big sunset out of your wanting hands.

Subtle and smooth
Kind with youth
and a sort of shifting
Truth; a constant variable

They always enchant me so - my soul
They always draw my eyeballs a perfect
picture, a painting of The End.

Though,
I am still not satisfied with it
It only flourishes with wisdom

The philosophy a fire

The lessons learned from
The cloaked figures

Approaching and speaking

Only a change in the mind
       could take them away

I must have lived a great life then
I must have conquered and scattered
My remains and the remains of it
Across time and into this life
For me to have all of these memories
And mistakes and memories of mistakes

From lives that seem already lived
Once before this

Speak up shortly and then
Toss my body in a shallow grave

Don’t hang on
For God has told me
That I’m wrong
So therefore, I will go out
With nothing but this poem

To(o)
Lead them home.

When I saw your eyes
It was like I had greeted death
With this fake smile
That I’ve always shown
Its haunting breath
Freezing me so
The cold hallway
Behind this door
Closed and dark now
Where I am and where I am going
I will never know

I wish I had never seen the sign
I wouldn’t have followed
I wouldn’t have gone so far

When I lost your eyes
It was if I had lost my shine
I can never smile
I am forever haunted
I’ve been thrown from the light

Please do just one thing for me, my dear
Don’t ever let me know
Don’t ever tell me how you feel
Please don’t come back to my face
Trying to scream out and repeat my name
Never again will you speak my name
I will never forget your face

Forget everything you loved
Because now I’ve remembered
Everything I hate

I hate everything I hate

I’ve been around and back
I’ve been dead and alive
I’ve been drenched in black
I’ve been stripped of my life

I’ve been hating
I’ve been waiting
I’ve been nothing

I’ve been. . .

Go to sleep.
Open up your dreams
To begin the amazing thoughts
and beings that conform
and reside around
the confusing words
that live in your mouth.

Lay with me,
Die with me
Open me up,
Twist me all around
and then put yourself in
Begin to see the inside of me
Inside the walls of my lungs
The black and graffiti’d walls
Wonderful, so good to be
All night, alright

What happened to you,
While you were inside of me?
Did you drive to the mighty sea?
Did you see the artist at work?
The girl in bed.
The man so lost.
The confusing air.

Mind of mine,
Lose your blues…
Use the abuse as the juice
To squeeze and drain
and inject into the veins
of this wicked country
Into your tattooed arms
Into the mind of your God
and your empty spirit.

Colliding and spinning…
Colliding and spinning…

I feel a euphoric wave of love
When you kiss my lips
I hear a faint whisper, Hello
When you embrace my ears
With your words
You can make hearts stop
Make stars drop
I see an angel
When I open my eyes
I feel your touch
In the hazy night

The taste of your sweet lips
Will never be gone
You hold the world’s treasures
On the tip of your tongue
Long waves of hair
Smother me every hour.
Eyes sparkling diamonds
So overpowering
Like an ocean of waves
You bring thousands of waves
To demolish my beach
Every night.
How do you do it?
Let me in
I need your touch
You want my love?
You need my love.

In this starry night
Two starrs have crossed
They have ended in lust
Down falls the dust
It covers us up
And ends the night
with love


a stranger in the crowd.

I had a vision of black and white

                              Nostalgic Nightmares in Haunted Hallways

                  Seven doors burned and bottles of un opened happiness left swimming to shore

                                                          ­                                                                 ­               they left me

                                staaag....gg..errr. . .ing alone

                                                          ­                          d

                                    ­                                                  o

            ­                                                                 ­          w

                                                              ­                           n

                                                              ­                             the corridor

Naked streets in the indians dream,

     Blowing trees are all I see...                          running WILD!

        The west was ONE and won by ONE



               All over again they will come around



     When I remember them

                      I'll come around....

                                                     ­                                              : Just like they told me to. Do what they told you.



                                        Breathe no more in this soggy air,

                                                           ­                                               the smoke in the air....

                          Staining the floral patterns on the wall,

                                         I can't get out of this hall                                                        .from­ hell.

                                                          ­                                    the morals intention

                                                      ­   on a blue sunday in October

                                      The crippling last words are always remembered

                  Sometime in December,

                                                      ­                           I'll dance again

with you,                                                             ­                                                                 ­ my love









                            It's all I can do...                                                            ­                           my love

                            I'll see you there







                                                               ­            Like a dove

Like last night.

I turned down time
As if I knew the circumstances of her parting
The clock had run a little too long
For my heart collapsing
The door had shut soon there after
The ability to turn around and go back in
Was now lost, there somewhere, out there
Away from here

                Anywhere but here
                                                 I long for

When will I remember how it was when that light was on?
When the fire was burning,
While the birds were singing
I hurt for the birds that sing the blues
I am there with them too
I'll sing my song out loud for you

          Love me strong
                   Or love me not
          Like the time is just wrong
                   On the hands of the clock


You wonder why: I wonder why
You plague my mind, I plague my mind
You will be left behind, I was always left behind
You wonder why: I wonder why


I am still alive.

Oh my heart...
How it is singing
I feel the sun with all new skin
I see the sun with brand new eyes
I laugh
This is the greatest thing in my life
I found it again
This time its for good, I know
The night will soon be with us
And everything will fall as it should.

The persistent ringing of their voices are left

Buzzing about in my brain

I wonder about what tomorrow will bring

I miss the yesterdays and todays

I feel the memories of love and hate through her life

I am broken by this

A life in which was in need of repair

I am in need of repair

Remembering the better days

And not forgetting your sad face

In my mind they circle around

Time after time.

Dark clouds hover over this dark house on the hill
Thoughts shroud around loosely in the curving winds
Hiding my heart from the beings that live inside them
Heartfelt messages left on a broken hallway table
A broken hearted man scrapes away down the sidewalks of doom
As the narrow marrow craving beasts file away slowly at his bones
And the women sit back and laugh about the sad sight of it all
So long Mr. Lonely Soul…

You’re now a lost soul that won’t leave my house
The screams that I hear in the night are yours, I know
I’d love to help you in your walk through my mind
But I just can’t ever seem to wake up in time
To save you from dreaming about me
Under your bed, I'll be in your head
Smoking with the skeletons in your closet
That you thought you hid so well.

I can tell you a simple story to ease the pain of the night
You can dream a sweet dream only to awake and find that it was never there
It is only the little things that you see during your lie, not life
The lives stretch through these seemingly pretty faces
And allow you to see into my mind
Scary thing, huh?

Simple words to these lyrics that will never be a song
I don’t want you to move on without knowing that I don’t care
Remember these eyes that will curse the very day
That I arrive face to face with the devil that you love
When I get to where I am going there will be no mind to mind
No time to find a real meaning behind the false meaning of life

No hurried, worried thoughts of mine

Upside down life

Get some ******* sleep tonight.

Walking in the cold
Just keep on flying
You will find the gold
Underneath the school
Ground to be found
Around the likely to be lost faces
I spoke too soon about the exit
Outside of the rainy doors
Save me lord
Push me into the path
Of a lonely soul
I’m a lonely soul
Smile for me
Lie to me
Die with me and see
The beauty
Beautiful words
Unfinished lives of mine
The mutual slump
Between our souls
In between the holes
That I’ve dug
While searching for the truth
and losing while trying to find you
Your golden hair
No more darkness there
Almost lost it here
And then you chopped up my heart
Put it in a blender and pressed start
and quietly said…

“Goodbye lonely soul.”

I hurt
          to be
                                                                                   seen                 by



                       Someone
                                        
                                                     other than

                                           the     other
                                                                                                                                Someone
          that                                  I
                                                      must
                                                               hurt
                                                                                                          to       see.

Complete loss of all ideas
Shut down like a VCR store
Forgot everything I love
(Nothing is real)
My castle was destroyed
On the east-side, high tides wash away memories
Every night, Everyday
Dunes block the souls lost at sea
Searching for closure on the dark bay
Will they never return to me?
You know the answer to this question
I can see you in my reflection
(Nothing is real)
I feel them pulling me under
Loving the rip tide
Breathe in the salty solace
Gone by low tide

This will all be forgotten from my mind

How can you fix this?
Breathe in the ocean air
Take time to remember
The last time we were together
The first freeze of the winter
On the last day of November
Our hearts will be better
All with a change in the weather
Nothing is real.

I’m tired
Completely exhausted of my flames
But yet I’m still burning
How could I feel anything?
When my inside is a fire
Burning all that it sees

O death
Save me now
Release me from this prison
In which I am held

Against my will

I feel the echoes fall upon me
Arousing lost senses of the old me
I forgot where I was for a bit
Hidden under some stones
Of a man that had no home
And barely a soul
Big enough to withstand
The pressures of this wretched world

**** this wicked world

The eye of the seeker is upon them
And me and my eye too
Are searching for the better land
But not here

Oooh…

What a strange window
The candle burnt a black spot on the inside

Pain can describe a certain taste
As I sit here alone staring through
haze and wool fibers caught in the fog
A complete mystery among the cool wind

A fond friend that has gone again
Is there a definite closure of the door
Or am I just feeling this way
Begging for a little more

Since the last time it was cold
I’ve changed
I’ve never seemed to stay the same

I’ve been a gleam in your eye
A shudder down my spine
Goosebumps down my arms
Her slight sight directly into mine

Send it back

Tattoos meet and greet
Skin on skin
Again and again

Put me on a shelf
Set me to the side
Sell me to myself

I’ve gave enough
I think I can go now

The openness is nothing new
It’s nothing I feel

Let’s run to the moon
Let’s swallow the sun
I can show you the room
I can show you some fun

Where will you be then
Where are you now
Let me know someday
Let me know somehow

I’ll be there.

One week
One week until I can release
All of my demons
All of the ones that eat away at me
At my heart and in my mind
I've come to terms with the fact
That I am completely insane
With that, most would decline.
But I know it. . .

How can I live everyday?
Wanting to leave
Silently listening to nothing
With those evil ******* begging me to give in
Just let us take control
Let me take everything
But I'm not ready yet. . .

What if I don’t wanna go?

I can't bear it anymore
Their scratching voices echo
Through my body and in my soul
Poisoning every step
I’m slowly letting go
I’ve called to you God
Why is everything so . . .

****** up, you are
You are ****** up
& this I know
Please tell me something different lover
& maybe I’ll let go.
But not yet
& this I know . . .

I am living here with
New ghosts and old regrets;
My voice was once solid gold.
But after years of abuse,
It’s faded from green to black in the smoke.

The full moon tonight will glow.

The cold blood from my veins
Will drain ever so slow.
Empty out my heart;
Let my mind go.
Throw my body in the river,
The only place I've ever loved.

Welcome in this horrible night
My favorite one of all
It lets in all of my demons
Into that long and crawling hall
That stretches across my life
They are tearing down the doors
All I have is seven lives.

Let it go Andy!
The heart will bleed.
All of your love is gone,
Why won't you let it be?


This is the most haunted day of my life,
I can tell you this for sure . . .
I hope that you will never meet me.
You will slowly drown too,
In my life of horror.

*“Tecum vivere amem, tecum obeam libens“

Isn't it strange when there are days
That when all that was once going well
Has been washed out in the rain
The entry point that I desire
Leaves me still and broken
My mind can't take in this denial
This wrong road that I have chosen
This feeling of regret, but no cause.

                                                         ­    No regret. No cause.
                                                          ­  Don't waste my time.

                                                          ­                                          I'm not holding on to them anymore
                                                         ­                                     Yet the devil is chasing me back to them
                                                            ­                                   But the Dark One; the Queen of Spades
                                                          ­                                         Took the Ace's Heart and held onto it  
                                                         
  ­                                                        She spoke secrets to him
                                                       & told the lightest of lies too.

The Ace's Heart had then been pawned into
an Ace of Spades
                              the poor fool.
All of because of her glorious face
the Queen of Spades.
                                Oh how beautiful!

                                                     Now speak only in a whisper. . .
                                                           Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
                                                         ­         Yes.          Yes.
                                     ­                                      Yes.

Is it I - the one
Me, who has to
strangle on this
side of
the morning?

With the lashes
of dew still
dripping, tripping
off of the
edge of
the fire.

Reminders
left there - all curled
up and slowly
deceasing
down into
the open eye.

Fog languidly
sweeps up from
our hollow valley
and begins to
eat away

slowly and slowly
into our
lives; Built on
chaos and
disarray from

Each other.
Can
you feel it?
Can
you feel
the thunder?

The Majestic,
The Majesty
Of the
Unknown. . .
The whispering
voices.

Awakened by
her songs
in the soggy
morning light.

A crack in
the shades,
reveals a
world

waiting to
be found,
when you
decide

to be a
man and
put

your shirt
back on
and

realize that
you've
just

dreamt
that
same

old dream

again. . .

The sun breaks through
The dark that does creep
Below the signs,
That is obviously attracting you there.
Wasting away again,
Under the glow of the streetlight mistakes.

Lost it all on a bet for the call girl’s storm.
Somewhere off the shore of my cloudy mind,
There is a hurricane killing the strangers
Shame on them for lying to us.

Where did you lose the thought of the dream?
At night? While you scream?
I think you will see the way to the path
That I have paved for you still.

Under the dark of night
We fought to win through the smoke in the air.

It never ceases to amaze me
The country and how it pleases everything
All of me!
Everything...
All of me!

I can't wait to tell you all about it
The stories, the lines, the borders
The counties of this country expand further than you can imagine
Or expect to order out of a Italian restaurant in the middle of the mountains.
The blondes run the show here
The accents explode before me
Oh what do you know?
So now that I'm so close,
I'm so far away
But I'm near my angel
With the smooth golden ways
Oh when I see her
I will show the world how wonderful it is to be loved by me...
You'll see
A few missed out but I'm okay with that
I missed out on a few
But I'm okay with that
Speak now or forever hold your peace
Silence speaks louder than your words, you'll see
So never hold your peace
Either shoot it out
& let it bleed
Or smile now
And live, be free
Look at me

I'm right beside you in your best time of darkness.