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There is a hole in my heart
You fired a bullet through it
The bullet got through
But the poison got stuck
The poison is engraved in the heart now
Making the hole grow bigger and bigger
People come in, try to fill in the hole
But now, the heart is in love with it
So it wont let go....
I don't know if god really exists
I m starting to lose my faith now
For so long, I have been crying for help
But it seems like he has gone deaf

Maybe this is it for me,
I have reached my breaking point,
Should I use a blade or a rope?
Maybe the jump of death?

But no I want it easy way
I don't have the guts to do it
Maybe I should ask someone else?
To do me this favor?
Free me from this hell....
I m not suicidal. But sometimes, you feel like you have just had enough and you just want to disappear.
Go on , tell your friends about me
Show them my pictures
Expose my secrets
Humiliate me,
Tell them you had me
Elaborate the details
Of how I looked without clothes
Of how easy it was for you
Of how desperate I was for love
But dont forget to mention your part of the story too
Of how you were a coward
Of how false your intentions were
Of how you got bored of me
Of how you lied to me
Of how you broke my broken heart
I saw her posting pictures of you two together today,
I don't know what happened to me after that
I could feel it, in my stomach, in my chest
I don't know what it was
Was it jealousy? Was it rage?

A series of questions are torturing my brain now
Why her? Why not me?
Am I not pretty than her?
Am I not beautiful than her?
Am I not girl enough?

I  surely don't know how to curl my lashes
I don't know how to fix my eyebrows
Can't walk on heels, Can't put on makeup
Never wore a skirt, never even an earring

But I know what makes you smile,
You like to get drunk on *****,
And sing Ed Shereen
You like to dance like crazy
You call it your "drunk dance"

Your eyes become wet when you yawn
And You don't like the freckles on your shoulder
You like pizza, But won't eat it
I don't wanna get fat you say

You have your way of kissing too
My style you call it,
when our tongues touch just for nanoseconds
And you pull yourself away

You like it when I give you a hickie
You'll check in the mirror if it is blue enough
You like running your fingers down my spine
"I love your curves", you tell me
"Your skin is so soft and you smell so pure"

You like sharing your toothbrush
You like hiding my clothes
You like closing your eyes and expecting me to kiss you
And when I don't , I can see the cute disappointment in your smile

You like chocolates 200%
You like gifts like a girl
Birthdays excite you like a child
And you can't watch a horror movie at night

Are these all phony?
The things you said to me, the things we did together
If so, you are quite an actor
And if I could, I would nominate you for an award
An award for the best teller of the untruths.....
That's what you are, a LIAR
Why is moving on so hard?
A day, A week, A month
And again I go back to the start
I promise I don' t love you anymore
I promise I don't hate you anymore
I promise I don't feel a thing anymore
But again, Why is moving on so hard?
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