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a Oct 2023
Tiktok.
---a place where people want to post videos to encourage others.
---a place where others don't relate to the video so shame the rest.
---a place where I just wanted to hear someone like me.
---a place where I had to read everyone hate on someone like me.
---a place where even if you know this video isn't for you, you must comment and let the world know this video isn't for you.
---a place where I can connect.
---a place where connecting is "shoving down your throat"?
To be continued.
a Oct 2023
3am thoughts are the worst.
---first I start to feen for smoke... it's not even good for me.
---then I crave for the love we had.. you don't even think about me.
---its either one or the other..
---these are the hours.. the monster starts to come for me.
  Oct 2023 a
HOPE
It has become one of the songs,
that we sing, yet we lost the meaning

We sing with no hope,
manifest with no believe,
neither understanding

But the question still stand,
are we really going to be okay?
a Oct 2023
I didn't fully stop.
I should've waited. Correct.
I realized though and even went slow.
No accident was done.
Both cars were at a standstill.
I just kept inching instead of a complete stop.
Two snails moving, one more of a caterpillar.
Indeed it was my fault. But...
You RODE up on me and threaten to hit me.
You could have. In your 6ft black jeep.
Drive right over me like a toy car in your monster truck.
I pulled to the side and let you go because you are in a hurry.
You screamed and I apologize politely.
You screamed. screamed and screamed. Face as red as my nails.
I didn't think this situation caused for that much anger.
This was nowhere near an accident.
I do realize I should have stopped longer.
Now I hear your screams in my head and threats to my life. You are angry at something greater than me.
That was rage at its finest.
I apologize. I pray. You are okay.
I pray. I am okay.
****.
a Oct 2023
The drug that never stops.
All day feening.
Till the last second.
Every last drop.
I dream about it.
Wish for it.
Crave it.
This.
Drug.
That.
Never.
Stops.
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