Please get out of my mind,
For my thoughts feel unsafe,
With you wandering through them.
I don't want to say I feel this way,
And I can't say it,
But I know it's true.

And I want that message to be from you.
Even though you and I are from two different worlds,
Even though I'm going to say no,
I want to be wanted.

I want what I can't have.

And I'd love to take you,
And care for you,
And fix you.

But that's a waste of time,
And not my job.

Watching,
Waiting,
Awkwardly in the background.
My friends flirt the night away.
Sure,
I'll dance a little,
I'll talk,
But I don't know these guys...
At all.
But there's no point in warning them,
They're too headstrong.
So I sit and watch as my friends break their own hearts.

And no matter what I do, you'll never look at me the same way that you look at her.
Sure,
She's prettier and flirtier,
She knows what to do in this kind of thing.

But me?
I've got a dream,
And just watch me make it a reality.

But I don't want to make it more complicated.
This love triangle has spun into a spider web,
And I mustn't get stuck in the middle,
For in this web,
I would be the prey.
I do not want to get hurt,
But dare I surrender?

He plays the piano skillfully.
Not many people know.
His friends do not approve,
So he let it go.

She used to write songs.
But she would never share.
She kept them all a secret,
Cause she thought no one would care.

So they locked them in a dungeon.
Far, far away.
And their secret talents,
Never saw the light of day.

Someone told us we weren't good enough,
*And we believed them.

He worked so hard,
And they let him go.
He turned to the darkness,
And it swallowed him whole.
He was addicted,
Could not stop.
He was restricted,
Could not reach the top.
Nowhere to turn,
And nowhere to go,
How all this happened?
He doesn't know.
And there he is,
Sitting by the store.
Some will help,
But most will ignore.
We judge him,
Though we might not mean,
We think less of him,
Like he's not on our team.
But it wasn't his fault,
He did nothing wrong.
We all think it was,
Like he could've stayed strong.
But we don't get it.
We don't know,
For all we see,
Is some guy by the road.

Maybe it's not my weekend
But it's gonna be my year
And I'm so sick of watching while the minutes pass as I go nowhere
And this is my reaction
To everything I fear
Cause I've been going crazy I don't want to waste another minute here."

What are you trying to get me to do?
What do you want me to say?
What are you trying to get me to lose?
Do you even care if I stay?

To the times I said I wouldn't like you,
But I'd look into your eyes,
And every ounce of self control,
Couldn't fight away the butterflies.
For the tongue tied moments when I'd see you,
And every pretty, witty thing I ever wanted to say,
Completely left my mind.
To every awkward silence,
Where I was too busy daydreaming,
To say anything meaningful.

What is love?
Is it like a one way street,
Where you either go with it,
Or you get run over?




So this is for the newly weds.
The lovers,
The taken,
The single.
It's for the heartbroken,
The confused,
The lost,
And the gone.


*What is love?

What would you do if I kissed you,
Would you return the gesture?
And when we pull away,
Would you lock your fingers between mine,
Stare deeply into my eyes,
And tell me how you feel?





Probably not.

If I kissed you,
You'd draw back.
And when you got away,
We'd never speak again.

Physically,
She sits in front of you in math.
She's right in front of you,
In this tired town,
Wishing she wasn't.

Mentally,
She's dreaming.
Fantasying of the places she'd rather be.

I like him,
He likes her,
She likes him.

I should just get out of the way...

Why would you even try,
Try to make me cry?
Why would you even disguise,
Disguise all of your lies.

Maybe you forgot,
About me,
About you,
About us.

So all I ask is why.
Just…
Why?

Why is it that,
He thinks that I’m pretty?
He thinks that I’m smart,
But I won’t let him fill,
That place in my heart.
Why is it that,
You don’t want me at all?
You lie and you cheat,
But for you I still fall.

I will not kiss up to you.
I will not do what you want me to.
I will never ever come back.
I promised that I wouldn't do that.
And I'll pretend the feelings aren't there,
Cause I know that I shouldn't care.
I remember sleepless nights,
I remember all the fights.
You expect me to be at your door,
I will not do that anymore.

Caught between the screen and the glass.
Please release me.

The snow starts to fall,
But does not yet stick.
The air smells of frigid,
And my coat becomes thick.
The delicate snowflakes,
Always a charm.
It's getting cold.
And I need your warm arms.

I wish that I could find a way,
To tell you what I mean to say.
I wish that I could hit replay.
I wish that I could fly away.

My thoughts are a tornado in my head.
The words I wished to say have not been said.
Time;
It moves at such a pace and I fail to keep up.
Smiles;
Fill with comfort, but don't last quite long enough.

My mind is just a blank slate that I drew.
I try not to remind myself of you.
Time;
It moves so slowly and I want it to speed up.
Smiles;
Yours is great, but it won't last me long enough.

My thoughts are a tornado in my head.
The words I want to say, I have just said.

I’ll write everything you never said to me.
I’ll put them in a jar.
And pull one out when it rains.
Maybe it’ll stop this pain.
But maybe it’ll break my heart.

All of the right guys fall for the wrong girls,
For the wrong reasons.
What am I doing wrong?

When you’re fed up with the world,
And you don’t know why.
When all you want to do,
Is sit back and cry.
When everything’s perfect,
But you’re still upset.
Maybe it’s not perfect!
...Maybe not yet.

You only live once...
More commenly known as YOLO
God, I'm such a nerd...Did I actually just say that?
...well that's new...

Anyways...
Though the song actually doesn't serve this message much good, (but has the capacity to get stuck in my head ALL THE TIME) this message is quite true.

I've been spending far too much time moping around about how my dreams never come true and a bunch of **** that means the world to me now and won't matter later....

I know this isn't poetry, but I wanted to get this out and write something that felt personal... Something that felt like me talking...almost...

So I realized that we really do only live once (duh) and that I don't want to follow the standard little path we're all started on and brainwashed into thinking  leads to success. I don't want to have a ton of money but hate what I do. Really, I'd rather just be happy.

When I'm older, I want to look back at my life and be proud of myself. I want to look back and think that I lived a happy life.

So I know I'm young. I know that 20 years from now I won't remember the cold winter night at 2:17 am that I wrote this. I won't remember why I had a crush on that one boy in 8th grade.

But, I will remember being happy, or more commenly unhappy and I don't like being unhappy, no one does.

Something's wrong and I think it's time to stop acting like it's not.

So yeah, I'm young. I've got a long road behind me and an even longer one ahead. I've got a lot of choices and mistakes to make. I've got a lot of things to fix.

I've got a pile of homework to catch up on, and a couple thousand ideas to write down.

It used to be when I grow up, I want to be a doctor.
An astronaut.
A figure skater.
A singer,
A gymnast,
A doctor,
President,
And so on,
But at this point, I want to be happy.

I don't want to be like her.
I simply want what I deserve.
But you fell for her.

I don't want you to know,
I don't want to let you go.
But you saw right through me.

I don't want to change my mind,
I just want you to be mine.

And you're not.


Of course.

You can have him.
Even though I like him a lot, probably more than you, he doesn't like me. He likes you. So you can have him...I guess.
You can have him, because with you, he'd be happy.
I like it when he's happy.
I know it seems unfair to me, but life isn't fair. I never come out on top with this kind of thing, so what made this time different?  
Maybe it was his smile.
Maybe it was his laugh.
Maybe it was that he'd actually want to talk to me...
But it was only to get closer to you...As it always is.
So you can have him.
At least one of us can be happy...

You're so far,
I can't breathe.
I need your light,
So I can see.

Keep me warm,
Keep me close,
Hold me tight,
Don't let go.

You love her.
Won't let go.
I love you.
You'll never know.