dear kiel,
remember all those months ago
when you had to guess what I was
how scared I was when you meant "now"
but all that came after was smiles
beautiful bashful smiles that someone understood


well, something funny happened today
a boy played a trick on me
I thought he was serious
and now he won't talk to me
it's funny, I thought he'd understand

"Language" , as my teacher assured me
"Is a way for us to express ourselfs."

or something along those lines.

"It it a tool to lie." or
"to approximate what seems far away".

For me it is a basement.
where one hides.

where a mistake is forgiven
and where I can fool myself

That all above is true

A plane flies off through the window.
257 people go to Heaven as
A plane flies off through the window.

You changed your clothes
right there in front of me.
The dust no longer clinging to your skin
like little specks of angel dust
Smiles fading into harsh words and tears
whether there's an audience or not.
A love stained like the sleeves of my shirt,
mascara-streaked and frayed along the seams.
I still can't handle real life.
Those inbetween moments where you're in his bed.
Where you're writing love letters on Valentine's Day
even though you hate it.
Your broken boy is still in pieces at the bottom
of your toy chest. Voice warbled from dead batteries.

And I was dead.
Dead asleep.
Trying to fight my demons,
In lands you only meet in dreams.
My pillow smelled of fear,
And my skin smells like you.
This perfume is the only remain
You left as evidence
of the ******
We
Both
Committed.