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 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
Je T'Aime
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
I wanna paint you 
like one of my French poems
With words I'll create for you a *** scene
From Je T'Aime
To Le petit mort
Starting to feel 
Used and abused
Done to death like a *****
The dark side of something beautiful
The holy ghosts that rise 
and infest the soul
With inspiration to avenge the dead
You stood there naked
And wanted nothing more
Than to ravage my skin
With your defense mechanisms
I'm your own little release
For the sake of art

Diamond
in 
the
rough
me 
up
buttercup
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
Inside/Out
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
Did you get to sleep
Or are you marinating
in chemicals?

The nightcap pulled
you down
dragged you
with your breath

You cut deep

Did you figure your
insides out?
You're inside out
spilling your guts
again
off-balanced
like an unstable
vivisection

Combusting your soul
back to a black hole
Counted off stars
in your eyes
you swore were aligned
Do you know what's behind?

Or will you keep looking?
Out there the truth isn't
it's all a reality
hallucinogen
generation of
self-prescribed nomads
It's about the journey
somewhere there lies
a destination
Lying about it's age again
and you can't touch it
Yet
it was here
the whole time
this very moment
and it's so
*******
beautiful
if you can get out
of your own mind.
 Oct 2013 Amber S
JM
Crawl to me, darling.
Elbows and knees, hardwood floors.
Sounds of submission.
 Oct 2013 Amber S
Samuel
I crafted a painting to
hang on that wall of yours

Someday you'll take it down
and think of me
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
I wrapped my lips
around your neck

Drank you down
kept palates wet

You left marks
I know just what
you meant

Bottoms up
     choke the message down
Little girl
     Do you wanna tear each other apart?
****** set
     fire to my *****

Heart shaped x-ray glasses
Now reality is the new *** tape
We're all framed in

Oh,
The transgressions you keep rewinding
Because fantasies just slow you down
Oh,
When you wanna keep moving
find grace in what you're doing
Oh,
The progressions the soul makes
when it follows the
heart beaten
path
Oh,
Can you even last?
I know
sometimes
I can't

I just wanna get off one time
     and not apologize
For spilling my guts
     trying to center
Your settled half-emptied glass
When all you needed was a refill.
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
Everyone's out to outdo everyone else
It's not even about meaning anymore
It's how much press coverage it gets
Whoever makes them "just" statistics
And there's no fantasy draft yet

Somewhere alone in his dark place
Ruminating his environment
Some bedwetting, fire starting, animal abuser
Infantilized by the hatred of maternal instincts
Projected on him
De-evolved

He likes the way she hurts him
She abuses open hand words
or clenched up fists of embarrassment
It just fuels his homicidal tendencies
His brains on the hate frequency
And he's ready to let the fantasy slip

Home is where the heartless host
absence of emotional ghosts
the boy
the man
the monster

He lost it

Family annihilator,
He took his mother out last
So she'd suffer through
the destruction of the *******
Her wasted wish
of abortion'd children.

This was before the news vans
This was before the first respondents
This was before the society outlash

Back to him alone in a dark place
In the depths of his disturbing mind
He sets higher stakes.
I wrote most of this after taking a course in Criminal Psychology. I noticed a pattern with a lot of serial killers having troubled relationships with their mothers. It's an interesting dynamic, the absence of nurturing is very detrimental to the development of the psyche in children. This is probably my darkest work, I thought no better time than to post it than before Halloween.
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
Hallucinor
 Oct 2013 Amber S
kenye
My heart beats
some manic
American dream

just
like
yours

We just have to go deeper
and not get too
emotionally attached

'cause destiny's a *****
just like the distance

Short-term impulse episodes
of mass enjoyment
vs.
Long-term miracles
of wishful thinking

I'm on that "Be the change you wish to see" ****
or believe long enough to see some strange ****
Truth be told,
it's amazing
how much you don't know
because you're
too scared
to look inside
or ever ask "why"
more than what
you read online

No.

It's always some new notification
an autonomic phantom vibration
of the lost soul

Missing out
on it's missing
piece/peace

That stumbles in tune
to delusions
of
Godlike
tendencies

Gracefully,
all the way
back to the pharmacy

As long as they're prescribing
hope and ambition
This American dream,
I'm sleeping on it.
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