Yawn! stretch and paw.

Oh, how I knead you,
purring to heal you.

My pink nose and whiskers
tickling your toes,
I knead you like dough
paw and purs I know.

I love you so.

I’m always the
cutest trend.

The internet loses
its sanity, sharing
my face as I wink
and shake.

Like a chubby loaf of bread,
I’m perched on your head
on your keyboard and bed.

You have no privacy,
for I am always kneading
you cuddling and puring.

I’m running ahead,
chasing shadows and
a piece of thread.

I know when you are
sad and sick, I pat
you and do cute tricks.

I share food and love
as though we are equal.

My love is unconditional.

Sometimes I seek attention
I tease by breaking things.

Meow, at the screen,
cat’s rule this scene.

I knead you, meow!
purrty please adopt, me.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

I sacrificed my life
for peace and stable mind.

I kneel every night,
bow my head and take
my plight placing it
before the Lord’s feet.

It’s no longer mine,
I lift myself up to
the Lord’s divine plan;
I promised him I will
follow the roads he
built for me.

I’ve met my shadow
many times, within
my meditation we take
flight.

A quiet place to reflect,
a mountain of possibilities
I climb and move by building
a strong foundation.

I am a tool, an influence
upon the environment.

I discovered myself years ago,
I once was lost; chained by
illness and grief, but faith
broke the chains and released
my soul.

I no longer grieve
I accept my condition,
by doing so I have already
won the fight.

I use to argue with myself,
I fought self-esteem,
I hated my differences
and being unique.

I had to face my shadow
before the walk, for the
deeper parts of who I am
was lost.

Depression and anxiety
ruled my life, until
I took control
I became its friend.

I am my own advocate,
for I am a unique soul,
one in five million I
stand tall.

Be proud to be you,
we all are beautiful
and rare.

I am a unicorn, autistic
and fair.

I love you and
everyone too.

I understand without you
I wouldn’t be here.

Life is never about me,
its about everything else
around me.

We are the designers of
life, we move mountains
and oceans.

We are the title waves
upon the great tragity
of life.

Live well, be bold
and brave, for life
is too short to always
be afraid.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

I ponder, what it is like
to be my shadow.

To be shadow,
Its lonely, avoid of color,
no cold, no heat, dark, and
empty.

Even though I am always
beside you, I am ignored
by most.

The dark devours me,
the light gave birth to me.

I am your companion,
never invited but welcomed.

I have written many a poem,
alongside your lamps and
daytime wonderings,
I am your inspiration.

A muse.

We are one, never departed
but separated by darkness,
and the light brings us together.

Every step you make, I follow.
Every move you make, I follow.
Without your breath I can not
breathe for you are my breath.

I am Shadow.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

No compromising, I am
bearing the pain.

The pressures crushing me,
slowly contorting reality
into a lucide dream of
misty minds melting into
burning piles of sore muscles.

I am twitching, cramping,
infections know me well.

I am the nightmare that reminds
you walking, talking, and breathing
should be easy but I am holding
you down.

Pain burning, deeply now,
slowly the fog devours everything.

My mind is a valley full of
infections and shadows
from my passed struggles
with dystonia.

In disrepair, every gear
I try to turn, every string
I try to pull gets me nowhere.

This marionette of broken
porcelaine, and burnt painful flesh
stretches to its limitations until
I pop, oops! all the black glitter
falls out.

My heart is strong,
my mind is loose,
my muscles are neither
but I am accepting this
suit.

I hold the power, self reflecting
keeps me grounded.

Lord don’t drop me now.

I’ve gotten so far, I forgot
about the sacrifice because
of this broken device.

Once its fixed my life persists.

Dystonia!

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

You won't get anywhere if
you want likes and following.

If you don't enjoy your writing
you need to take a break.

Writing isn't about likes,
its about enjoying the process.

A great writer knows how to write
from practice and passion.

Its not just pen and paper,
its a practice of patience
and skill.

It can become a drive that
is like a volcano.

The more you write and share,
more likely others will follow.

Don't give up! Just keep writing.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

Me: Don’t you come any closer!

I am warning you!

Please don’t come over, please.

I am trying, I am calm.

Don’t come back please!

I don’t like you.

Your horrible.

I hate you, your a monster.

Why are you here?

How do I stop you?

Go away!

Ouch! I am crying and oozing.
I want to bang my head into
the wall. I can’t set still.

It hurts so bad.

Cluster headache: Hahaha! Geer!
I bite you and stabe you in the eye.

You can’t stop me!!!

I will be back, you won’t see me coming.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

Expression, creativity, words,
artful, sentences formatted carefree.

Poetry can be a unique experience, its a form
of expression like art.

It is what the writer
wants it to be.

A simple definition,
poetry is a form of
writing. It’s an easy
concept that people
have over dramatized.

My own is free formed,
with freshly baked
ingredients.

My list of poetic ingredients

1. Imagine the story.
2. Think quickly.
3.Use simple words and build up to larger complex sentences. Until I reach a ******.
4. Be a rapper spit lyrics like a dragon spits fire.
5. Don’t over think about it.
6. Write.

"Be free in your mind
and the poet will fly."

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

I can smell the heat
raising from the stone
above, the earth is warm
but cold underneath the
slab I lay, no breath I
release.

I’m cold beneath the
girth of the grave.

So cold am I, choking on
the dirt, every night
I awaken to the living,
drinking from their
fountain of forever dead
but still I am digging.

Deeply burdened by the
acid sun, bites my skin
burns my being deep within.

Ash and bone, I’m
grinding the stone.

Dripping, bleeding,
tasting the heat like
a thirsty monster licking
its teeth.

Hunger lives in between
my teeth, grinning wide
with eyes like Sapphire
gem’s.

Lips as pale as my skin,
as ivry porcelain.

Salvation comes on the
beams of sunlight
streaming from above.

So close I am,
yearning for the
taste of blood.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

Imagine chewing a large piece of gum,
now after the first 25 chew’s
spit that out.

Now imagine yourself being
small enough to swim in a
glass of water, now place
your tiny self into the gum.

Try to run! Come on, run!
You can’t.

Then you try to move but
the gum is pulling your
body back into itself.

You build muscle and you find
away to move but you’re still
stuck.

You find out you can break parts
of the gum but you have to move
quickly.

From there you learned to
flop yourself against the walls
you can wait there for assistance,
like a fly in a spider web.

Now you understand how
I feel.

Also, I feel like a
beached whale, or an
overstuffed panda bear.

Let’s do the MizzTwitch shall we?
Wahwahwah! Twitch, twitch, twitch!
Yeah buddy! ~~~~~~~√

© 2021 By Amanda Shelton

From the gaping wounds I escape,
from its painful thrubs I leap,
relief is found in formatted sentences
and bleeding ink I smudged upon these pages.

For you to leave this page empty and
confused is to know I failed
to write a good poem.

It takes a master to draw you
in, it takes skills to paint
with words like an artist
paints with brushes.

Years of research and experience,
builds a masterful piece of work
and expressions.

Time dosen’t heal alone,
it needs help along the way.

Line by line,
slowly I build my rhyme,
it grows like a flower slowly
blooming into a beautiful tapestry;
complex and designed by a poetic
mind.

My threads are heavy, easy to read
and to imagine my story.

The simplest words and softest lines,
can build a tapestry so beautiul it
burns in your mind for a long time.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

This be truth,
love dreams of you.

You are loves wish
come true.

A kiss so fair, upon
a blushing cheek it
warms the heart even
when freezing winter’s
hug tightly holds your
heart in its contemptuous
embrace.

Love is the victim
of hate and abuse,
it can hurt you or
save you from
loneliness embracing
your fragile heart.

The heart is that like
porcelaine, it’s easily
creaked and tampered by
the pressures of love and
its embracing of passionate memories.

Upon a lovers promise,love
settles with the whispering
wind as two hearts are
colliding.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

I was born a poet,
with a pen in one hand
ideas in the other.

I am also, an artist,
with paint running through
my veins, and a bigger
picture mapped out in
my brain.

Its a big responsibly,
my birthright is to
be a philosopher.

I love learning and sharing
the knowledge.

Philosophy is simple, but the
concept is complex and diverse.

It can be a river of flooded
concepts, rooted in historic
preservation of ideas.

Philosophers like myself
preserve the ideas of its
concept’s and diversity.

Faith keeps my interest free
and unchained by societies
views of how life should be.

I knew early on in my life,
I am the master of my own destany.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

To be mad, is to repeat the same thing even though its broken. Beating the heart after it stops. Not accepting chances. Not taking effort to learn. Not caring enough. Thinking poorly of everything. Depression at its deepest depths.

I once suffered from madness. I became Alice.

Now I am the raven, I am craving a poetic mockery of a desk, with a quill in one hand and ideas in the other.

No madness in sight.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

Upon the waves I crashed
ashore, the force caused change and chaos pursued.

We all are like chaotic
oceans, crashing against
the shores of life.

We become earthquakes,
moving mountains with
our technologies and
inventions.

Our minds evolving over time, we become more aware of the changes we’ve caused.

Not everyone is open minded, it takes a philosophers view point to direct the way to the future possibilities.

I am a modern day philosopher, I enjoy learning and teaching.

Language is my best quality,
art is my favorite entertainment
and personal journey.

The art of living is
my job.

My poetic journey slowly
plays out upon these pages,
I’ve created.

My expressions stain the
internet with my rolling
formats of sentences and
word play.

Its a full deck of wildcards,
you never know what your going to get.

Jack be shameless,
Jack be nimble,
Jack be quick,
Jack drew an ace
missed the king,
kissed the queen of hearts,
while playing a deck of
fools.

We all play a part.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

We all are playing a part
in the tragic comedy, our
lives grind to ash slowly
as we are forced to face
the harsh reality.

Blissful ignorance once
blinded me, numbed my tongue into silence making
me dumb.

As I grew, I flew into
the fog I learned how
to clear the clouds,
I took control over
my own destiny.

Once I thought I was alone,
I met myself and discovered
there’s so much more.

I am not a lonely shadow
hunting for the light,
I am a flame a beckon for those who feel the same.

I am not lost, for I found
myself and I accepted who
I am. I will always second guess myself, but I accept
that as normal.

I can only bend to my own,
climbing mountains, and
fly over hills, but in
my own unique way.

I am brave and strong,
I’ve taught others to do
the same.

That’s my job and I’m
okay.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

To my abuser and ex love,

Upon my tears I release
my strife. The memories
of you taste like ash it
rotted and decayed long ago.

You promised me forever but brought me shattered dreams
instead.

I lost your heart to your
selfish muse, your in love
with greed and dishonesty.

I was beaten down until
I felt like I was nothing
but an annoyance an unbearable itch that keeps burning.

But it wasn’t me, it was
your sins that rules your
kingdom of hateful lies
you tell yourself.

You have no one to blame
but yourself, yet still,
still you cry wolf while wearing sheeps skin.

No one believes after
the first lie, each time
you speak to manipulate
you push a wage in between,
your a coward because you
don’t have the guts to be
honest and change your behavior.

I have worked hard to be
strong enough to not blame
myself for the abuse you
threw at me.

I am a good person,
I am a kind smart
and unique human being.

I had to learn how to accept myself while you were lying
telling me I am nuts and I
should take medication that
hurt me and I don’t need anymore.

If you are truly a good person
you would have changed your behavior and show it.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

Two hearts once collided,
hitting walls along the way,
beating passion drumming away.

Boom! Boom! Pow!
Love crashed upon the
shore, moved like a giant
wave shoving anything
in its way.

As the wave drew back
to its sea, it dragged
debra and trash, it left
scar’s upon the land.

Love can be fragile and
beautiful, it can break
things or make you stronger.

Love can hurt, because
its a mess of emotions all
in one place, the heart
is like a cage.

To love is brave,
to be loved is a want
a desire to be accepted,
we all crave its chaotic
wave and crashes.

The shadows of its doom
is always looming over
our heads, like a theft
in the night it slowly
sneaks up behind you
ready to collide with you
in the deepest depths
of our lives.

There’s always a boat
waiting for you to take
a trip upon the chaotic
sea’s of a lovers wave.

Tides of passion grow
as the seasons change,
so does the direction
of the waves.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

Like a frozen teardrop
I became water in your
touch and the warmth of
your kiss followed me
through the winter nights.

That was but a wish.

I remember this like it’s
a whisper left on my pillow.

The shadow of your memory
fades away upon the breeze.

Its over now,
it must have been a dream,
a long forgotten wish
that never got to breathe
for you took it back and choked it.

With your lying lips
and cold hearted burn
you killed the passion
with one word. Love!
It hurts sometimes.

©️ 2020 By Amanda Shelton

T’is a night of moonlit
dreams, a song of sorrow
the shadows sang.

Wolves vent their howls,
The star’s began to stir
and fade into the slow
rising beam’s of light.

Night shrouds the earth
in foggy clouds, a cold
chill settles still.

The inky black sky cascades over tragic hills, and
the night full of mysteries waiting to be discovered
slowly fades with the rising
of the sun.

Now a night of dreaming, I weep for I am awakening.

©️ 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Whilst wandering your dark
and tormented way you came
to my darkened doorway, and
I greeted you with a warmth
and loving light.

Upon these pages I write,
an expression away to
share my life.

I bring oceans and dreams
to life with my poetic
devices and digital pen.

Each line is formatted and
designed with you in mind.

I have a gloomy disposition
but a beautiful valley of
blooming flowers and a star
lit sky to light your way.

I am like a unicorn amongst
horses, my unique views draw you in.

My little heart beats like
a poetic drum.

I bleed poetic ink, leaving
my smudges upon your screen.

©️ 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Upon the rising sun the pain
arrives riding the rays of light. As the painful fog
migraits settling upon my
holiday cheer, like a shadow
monster ready to devour
the hours I cherish.

Upon the arrival of October and November, migraines and cluster headaches come for a visit.

Into the core of my eye drilling deeper over time,
blindness slowly devours
my vision as time beats
with painful rhythms.

An hour passes as the light
breaks through the fog, my
vision is restored as the pain fades away.

Ocular migraines are
nothing compared to
cluster headaches.

I’d rather suffer through the
Ocular migraines than have
a month long battle with a
painful stabbing behind my
right eye.

This is a ocular migraine,
but cluster headaches,
are the most painful hours
of my life.

There’s no treatment nor
cure for headaches and
migraines.

We are forced to suffer through the process.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

To be a great artist
and writer, you have
to suffer.

Those who survive
are those who become
great.

Be true and fearless,
for this too shall pass.

Remember your blessings,
sacrifices, and achievements;
and learn from your mistakes.

We are flawed but perfect,
as long as you believe in
yourself and trust that
you have a future.

Those who can imagine
the possibilities are
the future leaders and developers.

Be bold and brave,
don’t be afraid.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Watch her winding, watch her sew, watch her binding like a pro.

Black widow, sleek and true,
not so shyly she’s calling
you.

Sewing through out the night,
vibrating silk strings,
winding her threads slowly.

She says, “Come hither my
friend,” as she pulls out
her threads.

Careful now, she’s no friend.

She’ll trap you in her
spiders web.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

You fight with possibilities,
for footing but keep lossing
ground.

Your heart beats like
a monster ready to
devour your life.

Yet you keep the struggle.

Weaker but deeper you plung
into the history of pain.

Sucker punched by regret,
it heals quickly.

Don’t give up yet,
you’ve just got started.

Your star is still trekking,
searching for the life you were promised.

Look closely for your
missing the bigger picture.

Be like a sun blazing across the universe burning regret
like an unwanted cigarette.

Leave behind your flawes
and mistakes, the future
needs room.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

We are birthed from
flesh and bone.

We break the molds our parents built for us.

Mom and dad don’t you understand?

I’m no fool or puppet
to be controlled.

There’s no working mold,
it’s flawed and my life
is leaking from the holes.

The womd was worm and inviting, the world is
cold and fighting.

We come out surviving.

This life is demanding, grinding on flesh and bone,
until dust and ash remain.

You become dust in the wind,
a memory, a shadow of your former self.

Your memory is up to you,
what will you leave behind?

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Have you ever noticed that life is a memory but the current moment?  

It fades so quickly sometimes you don’t have time to hold on to it.  

The only thing left from yesterday is a faint perfumed moment in your mind.  

Like smoke, it slowly releases itself into the universe until it becomes smog and part of the other experiences you collected.

It fades when another comes to shove its way into the current passages of our lives.

It’s rare for someone to be able to keep it for a lifetime.

Life is but a passing moment an instant blink that lasts less than half of a second.  

A dream of sorts, or a clouded sky moving upon the forces of the wind.  

For me its a storm that builds it never fades, it just keeps collecting more of itself, gathering within my mind.  

My mind is polluted with memories.  

I am a bottomless pit of past experiences that never leave me.  

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Be bold and brave upon the ocean waves, descending into it’s depths of blue and gray.

My heart once sailed on the moon’s beams of passion. Written upon the stars, above my lovers gave the passion slowly floated away.

These tides are tragic and memorable, like a kiss from darkness it devoured my dreams and hopeful wishes.

My pain drowned the beating lovers heart, killed the possibilities of forevermore.

The shadows came to settle upon the meadows of my dreams, I watched as the light faded and stole the beauty I treasure.

Now I am left with suffering and a hollow space where my lover once laid.

Love is tragic and waning like the changing of the moons gaze. He bowed to me and said fair will, kissed my cheek and left me in his shadow.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Crash into me, brush aside your wasted time, I have a rhythm for your mind.

I’ve been ******* on a dime, I like it’s flavor, I know I am odd.

Can you ******* rythme, can you feel it’s metal zinging on your mind?

I’ve been working on this for some time, working up line by line building the ****** to engage your brain dragging you deep into my mind.

This is the depth of my existence, the ink bleeds from my arteries. Poetry is what I leave behind, my missy floods of expression.

Your left swimming in my pools of formatted creations, passion brings you to my surface.

I zing upon your mind, the taste is like metal, cool and you climb my mountains of rhymes. I’ll catch you if you fall, my rhythm catchs everything.

This rolls so easily off the tip of my tongue, like a cool breath exhaled with my rythme following behind. I plant my poetic kiss upon this page for you to consume.

Thanks for stopping by.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

I wanted to believe in us…

The universe had other plans for us, breaking the bones of love and passion. I bled for this.

Breath I am, pain I bear and I confess my bruises are deeply engraved in my heart.

Stitches hold the memory of you and your vows you left broken it tears the fabric of the love you promised me.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, kisses lost upon the losses I gambled on your broken promises. Stolen by the winds you blew into my heart of caution.

Nothing but scars remain. Your memory is nothing but pain beating at my chest for entrance, but I locked you out. Built a wall around the wounds. I am finished playing your sick game.

You walk with the devil, I am not like you. The Lord’s plan is more important. I am letting you go…

This pain is deviant, frustrating and blue. I’d rather have greens growing in my mind, a reminder of happier times. Trees full of ripened love, ready to be consumed.

My hopes ran away with you. I have to find a new hope, one that will never die. I have to let you go so my heart can survive.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Upon my sorrow pours my pain, flooding my life with suffering. The blue turns deeper with ever breath I exhale.

Slowly leaching forth from the depths of the darkness, my tears release agony from it’s caged room in which I grew stronger. Building strength to win this battle.

Pain is not a friend I invite over for crumpets and tea, it is my foe and greatest enemy.

I never wanted suffering, I never thought it would try suffocating me from the inside out.

For I am a candle blowing in the wind, I blow smoke to call you in. But pain decided to still the light that burns so bright. It tries to devour my flame as if I don’t hold it’s spark or kindling within myself.

Its ignorant to my strength, while pain beats loudly at my door, I am preparing for the future and nothing can still my heart.

I become a fixture, a brighter blazer than ever before. I burn for the Lord almighty. His flame never burns out.

Within the Lords heart I am rooted, my plot is firmly planted upon heavens girth. I will be reborn in heaven. Like a seed I grow underneath my Lord’s feet.

The plows are ready to sew what I reap, each grain goes to my flame feeding my soul leaving my suffering barren and defeated. I sacrificed my pain so I can live again.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

A writer never dies, for
their life is published
on pages of white,
they live forever within
the stories they write.

I sat thinking many times
before, spilling my missy
thoughts all over the floor, exposing it for all to read.

I am a writer,
My life is a paper
crisp and crumbled
with ink smudged edges.

I am always
lost in the jungles
of my deepest thoughts.

A ghostly poet
reincarnated through
a lost art of ink smears
and smudges.

I am yelled and scared
by time and my poetic crimes.

I gather myself upon these
pages, so the masses can
devour my deepest thoughts.

No pressure,
no pushing or shoveling
just a grave for my
poetic muse, for your
passionate views.

I bring to life expression,
my written strife burning
holes in the book of my past
experiences one line at a
time. Formatting strife
while I surf the poetic oceans of my life.

I fall deeply into the dark
but I burn bright as the
black devours the night,
for I become its light.

No darkness can divide us
from this process.

For I bleed ink so you
don’t have to, I sacrifice
my suffering with poetic
justice so you can find my truth.

These page’s are witness
to my poetic crimes.

Welcome to my personal
expression, its a trip into a
passionate relationship
with my muse.

No depression can survive
for my muse devours it with
darkness as it collapses
upon these pages turning
into smudges of life, I
bring it into the light.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

I trusted you with my heart,
you manipulated and tortured
me until I fell apart.

You never loved me,
instead you accused
and tortured me with
your constant accusations
and abusive nagging relations.

You cheated on me
with your addictions
and your blue devilish
eyes.

Your good at manipulation.

You brought the devil to
my door with no remorse
or respect for my life.

You lay upon your bed of lies,
amongst the decay and flies
your most comfortable.

Your betrayal smells gross,
as you try to hide amongst
the ghosts of your evil deeds.

The ghosts pound upon the posts,
pounding louder as you blunder
through your life, your deeds
hot upon your trial.

You can’t hide from your
demons boy, the truth finds
you with its brilliant spotlight
it burns your eyes and pushes
you out from beneath your lies.

Nothing covers up the truth.

The truth is always behind you,
you can cover up a lie by telling the truth, so why waste your
time being a fool telling lies?

Honesty brings solitude and
strength, lies bring ugliness
and unnecessary pride and
prejudice.

You tired to make me look like
a fool, when you are the
dishonest one and God knows
the truth so does my family
and friends.

You messed with the
wrong lady, I’m no fool
for the devil like you.

I don’t play the poker game
of lies, I don’t like flies
I respect my life and faith.

You decided to lay upon
your bed of lies,
you look like a fool
with your devilish grin.

Your playing the game with
the devil on your back.

He’s biting you but you
never fight back.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

I leaped free from my tapestry
so I can show you the colors
of my thread.

Life is like a thread
it slowly creates a colorful
tapestry of emotions and
experiences.

A poet saws you a personal
expression with our creative
threads of passion.

I am set free through
the flying threads
I toss over my head
unto these pages
I am formatting.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

There’s a daisy for each broken dream I’ve experienced.

There’s not very many but
one is too many.

My pain burns from the depths
of my soul, I shed a tear for every wound I bare.

These river banks are a reminder
of the love we made.

Amongst the flowing water
we are the ripples we make,
every step we made was another
bough to break.

As the sunset upon our lovers
bed, a shadow slowly crept
to devour the covers.

We never had a chance,
the devil took his stance.

He played his violin with great ovation for his audience.

You decided to dance.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Bobbing in the memory of you,
I floated on cloud nine.

In the depths of darkness
I lost you to its craziness.

You fell for the stars
as they caught your eye
taking you far away from
where we started.

The journey is chaotic
and fast with its blazing
blasts of heated violence.

Love was tired of running from your addictions and crashes.

You broke the shores as you
crashed into its sands bringing
broken glass cutting my heart
deeply leaving scars in my past.

Once we were happy but now
there’s nothing but sadness
reminders of the love story
you promised.

But I am okay its soon to pass.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Should you be sad for
my ocean eyes?

Love bleeds from my broken heart, felling my dreams with drowning sorrows of past experiences of lovely
blues and greens.

The waves are a reminder of
the broken dreams we suffered
together, as our love crashed
into the shore.

I regret nothing but waiting
for so long to walk away
from these bruised memories
of who you are.

I make new dreams healing from
the wounds I’ve dressed with
my armored lives I grew with
weeds and broken hearts,
I keep them tightly sealed
within my caged self.

Yet, I let my sorrows fly free
like a bird crying for the sky.

Should you be sad for
my ocean eyes?

Love crashed ashore breaking
the tides with its chaotic lies.

Love came upon a whispering wind, touched the depths of
who I am, and kissed my soul leaving me with ocean eyes.

I am weeping under the trees
of broken dreams where my
lost lovers crimes are barried
deep within the earth, there
in the hollow girth I placed
a stone in memory of you.

With deep sorrow I say goodbye
to my pain and suffering.

Such dreams are to come
when I close my ocean eyes.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Every morning I wake in pain
but some place in the depths
of time your memory eased
the strain.

Our lives together faded
with the passing rain,
you became the gray clouds
over the oceans that downs
the love we once had.

Your betrayal broke the dream
we were supposed to be free
as two birds flying high
above the sea breeze.

You lost yourself while
I found myself, you never
noticed I was always waiting
for you to come to the surface.

I held my breath,
when you should
have been holding
my hand instead.

You left me adrift upon
your endless seas of
blues and greens, there
I found the truth the deeper
parts of me , I learned to love myself and accept everything.

Beyond the surface of the dream
I once was adrift amongst the
dead seas you cursed with your
endless push.

Love left me to drown in
its depths of darkness and
chaotic waves.

Love left me abused and
in pain, without remorse
or apology.

I was forced to accept it.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

I slowly became rooted within
the fiber’s of my chair, it
supports my life of pain
and grind.

With its needless blues and greens rushing through my veins.

The blues are sadness,
the greens are my favorite
things I miss the most.

I once had a dream now
I am lost amongst the clouds
and the fiber’s of my life.

I once was a shy girl,
I grew into a poetic format
that is rooted in my life like
the chair is rooted in my strife.

My blues are easy to express,
it flows with a slight pressure
a push and shove. Once I open
the gate it floods the page with
my tears and faith.

With my broken heart I fell apart
but poetry keeps it hanging on
by a thread. My love bleeds out…

Love gave me doubt and a reason
to run out. I became its broken jar
full of bruises and tears.
Don’t forget the poetic formats
that bleed from my roots and drowned me in tears.

You became a scar upon my heart.
The scars are inspiration burning
hot and it grows wild deep inside
its depths. Now its rushing,
gushing out.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

You know your a poet when your spitting out poetry and you trip over the words but it still makes sense.

The format keeps flowing, floating in your mind like a leaf on the breeze. It landed upon this page.

Mouthful of grunge and ***** blues leaving my jeans stained with regret, I didn’t express myself sooner than I expected.

Now I am mowing the lawn with over the top wordplay, spitting my poetic fire like a rapper losing volume quite but still slick from losing my grip. I catch myself quick.

Twisted rhythm with grinding rhymes and flooding banks of expression. I never leave without passion, I burn like a wick my candle is hot and half melted. Its wickedness lashing out from the blazing words I am expressing.

Call me a poetic fool but I am not joking, my passion burns holes through the internet disconnected from myself, just so I can express myself.

I think like a flower, my passion withers away if I don’t keep expressing in poetic ways.

I hold a lot of power in my words. Words are mightier than a sword. But only if you keep writing…

Express yourself just keep writing.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

While musing over the past
I feel lost in the fragments
of the memories of you.

You stole my dreams
with your lies that you
love me.

I regret nothing but
holding on longer than
I should have.

Our love is a shadow
a memorial of past pain
and struggle.

I have learned how to
stand stronger, how to
love myself and let go
of expectations of
unforgivable love.

In the end I am no longer
held back by your shadow,
I am stepping out into
the light so I can ones
again shine.

You should be ashamed
of yourself for dimming
the lights so you can
steal the spotlight,
because we were meant
to be a duo sharing
the light.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

My dreams use to bruise
my ego, until I learned to
let go of my ego and reached
for my dreams instead.

I replaced my fears with
passion for life and
the ocean doesn’t have
to calm down because
I learned how to ride
the waves.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

I use to be just another
shadow amongst other
shadows, until one day
I decided to step into
the light.

I grew so bright,
my flame shines like
the sun, you will never
lose my vision for it
burns within your mind.

So many times I have
ran from my fears,
I got tired and decided
to give up and
start a new life.

I allowed doctor’s to open
my head to implant a device
that gave me freedom, I never
knew before, I learned how
to fly and grow my life.

Upon my new found wings
I choose where I go
from here.

I have a lesson for you,
forget what you believe
you are capable of doing,
let go of your expectations
and learn how to join me
within the dreams waiting
for you.

The freedom of acceptance
is a breath of fresh air,
you will feel like you
are flying upon a breeze.
Like a leaf floating on
the wind, you choose
where you land.

Just don’t forget to keep
climbing, and get back up
if you are falling.

A brave person knows when
to rest, a bold person knows
you have to sacrifice to
succeed and move forward.

You know what I sacrificed?

My fears! The one thing
that held me back for years.

My life is blessed because
I love and I wanted to share
my passions with you.

You are the reason I fight
to live my life. I want to
be an example to show all
of you what we are capable
of doing.

You choose if your life
is a hindrance.

We sacrifice our dreams for
society but you don’t have to,
you are a unique, beautiful, living, intelligent being.

Your choices dictate
who you will be.
So be free!

I got brain surgery,
faced my fears so I
can be who I wanted to be.

I am an autistic woman with
a rare movement disorder,
my IQ is 200, and I never
forget.

I don’t want you to forget
how special you are too.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

You brought greed and pain
to my door, broke my heart
and stole my food and pills
you left me in pain and
to starve.

With no remorse you stole
from others too, you lie about
your purpose and support.

You are no ones friend,
you’re an abusive judgemental
dude you manipulate, behind the scenes you say horrible things
you are not honest and clean.

You even accuse me of being
abusive when I have done nothing
but change my life to stop your
abuse.

You lied about your apology,
you haven’t changed anything,
you still use people and drugs.

Why would you accuse a
handicapped person of
doing things they are
unable to do?

You are the only dishonest
person here, no shade do I
cast, for my soul shines only
for Jesus and I never show
any kind of evilness.

You can ask everyone else,
I am honest and loving.

As for you,you have no stable
ground to place your blame
on everyone else.

I have no blame for
I don’t do shameful things
or accuse others, I keep
to my home where my chair
is placed and my cat rests
beside my legs.

I have seizures and pain,
my autistic brain keeps
me busy and my sanity
stable as well as my faith.

You don’t support my sanity
and faith,you gaslight
everything until I second
guess myself.

You called me the liar
while you did drugs and
stole from everyone else.

You play your music that
causes me seizures,you
turn on your devices
after you told everyone to
turn off the lights, so
I can feel better.

You make excuses
to judge others when its
you whose doing bad things.

You have no one to blame
but yourself, no one hurt
you or caused you suffering,
you’ve abused yourself
before you met everyone else.

I have no problems but what
you bring, I worked hard
to build my life above the
pain and suffering I’ve been
forced to endure.

You’ve never supported me
or made me feel stronger
and beautiful and like
I am a beautiful queen
by your side.

You’ve made me feel unwanted
and ashamed, you made me
think I am insane.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Upon the pieces of my
broken heart I shattered
into fragments of our love.

My wounds leave scars,
left in my jars of past
broken dreams you broke
with your passionate tongue,
you promised me forever,
I got thrown away and
tossed to the side instead.

Your words saturated my heart,
until it burst at the seems
releasing my broken dreams.

I might not be able to
fix the future of our
love but I am able to
move on and build
new dreams.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton