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Stale Memories Seep Into My Mind,
The Sight Of Faces So Brutal So Unkind,
Confessing The Unholy Truth Which Is Entwined,
In The World Of Blackened Sin In A Sacred Shrine

Epiphanies Swimming Inside The Confusion,
Life A Lie--Caught In An Illusion,
A Mind Weak From Climbing Hills Of Thought,
All Of The Mountians I've Never Forgot

The Pleasure Of Escape Is Reality Of Dreaming,
Though When I'm Awake My Soul Is Screaming,
Chills Race Along My Pale And Chapped Skin,
From Enemies Staring--A Deleterious Grin

Fatigue Grasping Me In Angry Fists,
My Heart Breaking--Endless Splits,
People Standing On Streets With Bottles Of Gin,
Just Trying To Forget All Of Their Sins

Stars Guide From Up Above,
Dark In The Sky--Billions Of White Doves,
Lights Shining Beautiful And Bold,
I'm Finally Fine, Believe What You're Told
 Dec 2012 Amanda Fletcher
brooke
will i steam like
naked earth beneath
the tepid rain
raw?
(c) Brooke Otto
 Dec 2012 Amanda Fletcher
Ben
you took my broken pieces
and saw them as whole
this cracked and defective machine
made of emotions, memories, and
a heart that beats
accepted as flawed
for there is beauty in this mind
that gravitates towards my own
worst enemy - me
and you discovered the good
in the bad
took it for what it was
love
While sleeping in the water,

Sea otters may hold hands to keep

From drifting apart.

Holding hands,

Minds sail somewhere between consciousness

And to a sea of thoughts and wonders.

We take to rough waters and

Tighten our grips

And then relax them.

My pale body’s dead cold,

But my hand comes to life in yours.

We stroke each other’s fingers with our own,

Each digit of yours is so smooth

Like an otters silky coat.

I study your hands

Every curve

And every bend.

Blinded by wondrous waters,

Touch will find your promised land.

As you studied me I thought,

“Don’t let me go”

Because I was drifting towards love

And I didn't want to go alone.
Inspired by the car ride home last night and the cute fun fact about otters
I remember having conversations with you about all the things we would do. Camping, going to the zoo, having a barbecue. I was going to cook for you because you were always eating chicken nuggets while I was cooking myself real meals. I remember when you smiled because I said I wanted to spend all that time with you. I remember when you made me feel like those things might actually happen. I remember when you told me that I was amazing. And that you didn't understand why someone like me would like someone like you. And I remember how you felt when I said that you were being crazy and that I thought you were the most amazing person I've ever known and that if anything you were the one who was too good for me. I remember when I told you that you won my heart but hadn't come to collect the prize. I remember how you said you had two prizes to choose and it was so difficult for you. Not knowing who to pick. Afraid that picking me would be the wrong choice. Time and time again I do so many things that should show you who I am and what I am to you. I try to show you that there’s nothing to fear. But you won’t let me show you. Why? Why won’t you just believe me? Why would I hurt you? I can’t even stand myself when I’m mad at you for a split second. Why would I lie to you? I never lie to anyone, especially not someone who’s so honest to me at all times. Why would I fight with you? The only arguments we have are based off of you not agreeing that you’re beautiful and that you don’t need makeup and that you don’t need to spend so much time on your hair and that you look fantastic regardless of what clothes you’re wearing. Why would I ever let you go for anything? After spending so long fighting for you, I would never stop fighting to keep you. I would never hold you back. I would want you to be happy. Do you want to go somewhere? So do I. Do you want to drive to the middle of nowhere? So do I. Do you want to go out? So do I. Do you want to stay in and relax? So do I. Do you want to hang out with your friends, then go ahead. I can make plans; I have a life of my own. Do you want to be alone? I’ll respect that, like I always have. Why can’t you just go back to the days of holding my hands and getting that glorious feeling? Why can’t you go back to the time when you remembered that feeling you got when I held you. My embrace having something magical that neither of us could explain. Remember all the times we talked and talked and talked and found out we have so much in common. Remember all the days where you wanted to tell me good morning and good night, regardless of if we talked all day. Remember all the times that I put a real smile on your face on the days when you said you wouldn't be okay. All those days I told you that your smile was too pretty to go to waste. I even remember when you first said you hated your smile because your teeth aren't perfectly straight. I told you it didn't matter, because you have such a true happiness in your smile. That gleaming beauty that no one else could ever show, yet you still didn't believe me. Even if you didn't believe me, you still smiled. I remember the place and the time and the day that we talked about how things were going.  I remember you said you couldn't be with me but you wanted me to stay in your life as a friend, so I said I couldn't be anything to you. And I remember you started to cry. And I hated everything in the world that night. Things were entirely opposite of how they should have been. I remember all the times I tried to keep you out of my head but I couldn't. Now you won’t talk to me about anything. Like I’m some madman for caring about you. You act like all the things I say are lies. I don’t think I could make your life better, I know it. I don’t think I could make you happier, I know it. Just try to think of all those perfect words I said to you. All of the times I wrote something that left you speechless. Just think of all those times. Just remember. Quit hiding it away in your pockets like old receipts and pen caps. I can’t stop thinking about you because you’re the one ******* thing I want in this whole world. I don’ t care about your past. I don’t care about any “imperfections”. I don’t care at all. To me you’re everything I could need. And I can’t help but love everything about you. I just want to have love for you, though, instead of love for everything about you. And I have more love to give than anyone else you've ever known. I might not be better than everyone at everything, but I know I’m better than anyone else at what’s important. I know you could always trust in me. I know I could never hold you back. I know I would keep a smile on your face at all times. I know you wouldn't be waiting around for perfect moments, because I would make every moment perfect. When people ask you what the happiest time of your life was, you wouldn't say it was when you were younger and had your own place and did what you want when you wanted to. You would say that the happiest part of your life is now, because I would make every day better than the last. You wouldn't keep living in the clouds and staring at the stars, you would be with the stars and the moon. You wouldn't need to dream anymore because you would just dream of when you finally get to wake again. I’m not making things up. I’m not hopeful. I’m not optimistic. I’m not a liar. I’m not a dreamer. I know I could make everything better, all the time. Don't think it's too good to be true. You used to say I was too good to be true, but here I am. So just give me a chance to prove it. You’ll never regret it, I promise. Zebra.
The last part (Zebra) is only significant to one person.
If this BLISS comes knockin'
BLISS wants in, O' Be Lite Swift

Say the 'Door Is Already Open'
Bring Friends All The More!!!
I.
Lovers, hold on to everything.
Because when you’re holding on for dear life
That’s when you find what you’re made of.

II.
I walk and the rose petals fall
(Slowly)
as if they have gravitational properties
which allow them to float
for just a while longer
Before they hit the ground.

God I wish for that gift.

III.
An ethereal light
Illuminates my figure
I crashed onto the ***** mattress
On an even dirtier floor
And writhed my body
Screaming
Wait

Wait.

WAIT.

This isn’t the story of heartbreak
It’s the story of what happens after it.

IV.
I’ve felt the heat from the core of the earth
Give birth to my broken body
He broke me but I fixed me.

(It took an eternity)

When I thought I just needed his love
I found I just needed mine.
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