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A M Sep 2022
I want to shout, burst, reach, touch
but all that I'm met with is a void

this is paralysis
A M Sep 2022
listening to music
helps me remember who i am
A M Aug 2022
I can see the emptiness in your pixelated eyes
the effort in your virtual smile

This distance is like a glass plane
I can see your pain, but I can't reach it, can't reach you

If I could, I'd hold you close,
nuzzle into your side
scratch your back,
empty your mind

my baby this too will pass
but it doesn't feel that way just yet
A M Aug 2022
i want to protect you
and blame what i need
on some deficiency in me

and say baby don't worry
i am hurting
because he hurt me

i am hurting
because i am just not quite right,
just not quite good enough

(and most of the time,
i believe it too)

but i have to try to believe
that i'm as worthy as anyone else
and that i hurt because i am human

the truth is this:

lately i have felt
like i am rationing your love
and my stores are running low

i am scared

fill me back up
A M Aug 2022
you told me that you love me
because i make you feel safe,
and loved

well when the sky goes dark
and the silence from my phone rings louder
and the voices in my head whisper faster

i hear:
you love me because i love you

(and god, i do)

but my dear,
i want to be loved
because i am me
(the way that i love you
because you are you)

so tell me,

could you ever yearn for me
the way that i yearn for you?

could you put yourself aside for me
the way that i would do without a thought for you?

could you see me, adoringly
the way that i see and unconditionally love you?

i don't know
but if you do
i need you to show me
A M Aug 2022
sometimes i feel so afraid
that you'll never love me
the way i love you
A M Jul 2022
I've been without a home for a while now
Having as much adventure as time will allow

I have climbed mountains and I have seen stars
I've danced and I've traveled wide and far

But to be honest what gets me through
Are thoughts of coming on home to you

Of you being the last place I will land
Of yours being the roots upon which our home will stand

Because then when we adventure together I know
I will always carry with me a sense of home
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