post traumatic stress disorder
got to get my thoughts in order
in my head i'm one big hoarder
of all the thoughts of my disorder
struggle to compart the scenes
or find out what they mean

i have nightmares
i can't share
if you ask me
now
they aren't there
only now that i'm awake
i have this feeling
i cant shake
my therapist asks me
with that face
if its real
or
if its fake
but it was real
i tried to wake
but this nightmare is like a snake

hello world,
i'm *ucked up in the mind
i hope you don't mind, but
i'm socially confused, and
please keep in mind
when i speak i am kind
and racially color blind
but if you don't mind,
i'm *ucked up in the mind.

can I get an omen?
any kind will do!
maybe a good one,
and maybe soon.
if its a bad one
i'll have to make do.
offers always open
though
even if not
your silence is golden.

i've learned my lesson
its my depression
not for discussion
or debate
i'm tired of the messin'
of all the guessin'
when i give up, so
you'll be too late

*** slave perplexed slave
or maybe just a slave
a *** slave is the best slave
or at least that's what they think
from narcotics to ******
and so on the edge or brink of death
she has no heroine

she lays there quiet on the floor
welcoming numb unconsciousness
before she wakes to the sobriety
of a new day of painfulness
questioning her beliefs
and fearing the time that's left
asking, begging, doing her best
there's a dark hole in her chest
so alone and so very lost
it crushed her heart and damnation is the cost

this *** slave is a hexed slave
never to care again
this next slave was fixed a slave
and now she's locked in
her mind is set on fear
a terror of the dark
she shuts out the sound
though angels sing
the song of healing
hark.

oh
but this slave is a jinxed slave
bad luck is all she has
and she becomes the hexed slave
to wait for time to pass
or maybe not a slave at all
if she could only last
even when shes on the brink
it hurts too much her past

flashbacks and nightmares
to give her chills and raise her hairs
absentmindedly thinking
its just not fair
that mom and dad are never there
to help her calm and keep her safe
now all she does is wait.

this jinxed slave is perplexed
though also bored and vexed
why do they pay so little attention
she feels as though shes hexed
even though shes a former slave
she does not feel so ex'd
'cause if the wrong remember her
she might as well be dead.