Downfall.
scrapping knees on concrete.
head slammed hard into fist.
muscles ache.
eyes grow tired.
limbs swell.
lips bleed.
tears fall.
you win.

a dust blows in the wind.
that which of many bodies burned and broken.
I inhale.
ashes crowd my mouth and i am no longer alone.
I am with the many who died that day.
Families  search for loved ones in the ruins.
I carelessly breathe them in.
they are returned to the world through my tears.
Cloudy tears stream my face as i think.
Dust covers my face, as i watch people fall from the sky.
Are they living? Are they alive?
Running people trampled looking for shelter.
I think of the planes.
The people on them, and the fate they soon would encounter.
I sheild my face for fear of recognition, that one may cry with me.
The smell of burning flesh and gasoline fills my nostrils, i can not breathe.
I gasp for air.
Connected through burning bodies, tumbling buildings, and falling limp corpses.
A connection so deep, we fear the day.
A day when we remember.
A day when the nation changed.
A day that will haunt us forever.

I want you.
She has you.
I want to talk to you.
She talks to you.
I say your name.
She says it louder.
You say Im pretty.
You say shes beautiful.
You take a picture with me.
You create and album with her.
I try to tell you.
She covers your ears.
I pull you in.
She pulls you away.
You pick her.

If I could get a tattoo
it obviously would not be of  you
you already scarred me deeper than any needle and ink ever could.
unknowingly etching your future into mine,
thats not what I want.
the removal process would take too long,
years of treatment.
This invisible tattoo you left me with,
unseen to anyone else,
I see everyday.

With shaking hands do not touch me.
Shaking loose a silhouette of grief,
pain blankets the sky,
I tremble ; the past is coming.
swirling down upon me.
My inner core tenses at the thought of it all.
I will break,
the ground craking beneath me I shake.
your wrath.

mind blank
wrist bare.
blade ready.
an empty canvas.
paint.

You say actions speak louder than words
so why can you not hear my body screaming?
screaming for attention that you might turn your head.
notice me!
my wounds bleed,
drops staining the floor and you still refuse to see,
your little girl is dying, she needs you.
pounding on your door, open up!
notice me!
pounding results in pulsing headaches,
pulsing headaches result in pain.
pain is happiness, but only when self inflicted.
I cant play this game with myself any longer,
I call out for you,
notice me!
time is running out,
my mind paces I feel it might never stop.
Voices growing fainter with every slice of this metal demon.
Soft breezes whisper,
nooooticccee meeeee
the breeze stops,
I can no longer hear the cries from with in the depths of my soul...
**you noticed me