Sonnets and ballads
Same length sentences
And blocky form
Used to describe you
Is like creating the Sistine Chapel
With paint by numbers

You fit no form, no pentameter
And while hips rhymes with lips
And yours are gorgeous
There no rhyme nor reason to Love

Sonnets and ballads are beautiful
In the way any SoCal girl is
Bleached blonds with big *****
Fit the paper definition of beauty
But paper wilts and crumbles
My Woman Stands strong
They can have their silicone, their plastic
Because when we touch, I feel something real

Remember I Love You, I whisper
Like You needed the reminder
But the smile tells me
The words hit home

And as meaningful as words can be
When we’re together
It’s the absence of them that’s beautiful
Lips are for kissing
Touches and caresses
And looks and smiles
Are what tell You
I Love You

Sonnets and ballads
Same length sentences
And blocky form
Used to describe you
Is like creating the Sistine Chapel
With paint by numbers

You fit no form, no pentameter
And while hips rhymes with lips
And yours are gorgeous
There no rhyme nor reason to Love

Sonnets and ballads are beautiful
In the way any SoCal girl is
Bleached blonds with big *****
Fit the paper definition of beauty
But paper wilts and crumbles
My Woman Stands strong
They can have their silicone, their plastic
Because when we touch, I feel something real

Remember I Love You, I whisper
Like You needed the reminder
But the smile tells me
The words hit home

And as meaningful as words can be
When we’re together
It’s the absence of them that’s beautiful
Lips are for kissing
Touches and caresses
And looks and smiles
Are what tell You
I Love You

Walking down the street
I often trip
Over the despondant and pathetic husks
Of Moral Invalids
It is easy to gloss over
The danger and contamination
The way these people pollute life
With delusions and manifestations
Rooted in their simple minded
Conjuration of the will of invisible men
Unfortunately the majority is swayed
Clinging desperately to
False comforts congregation brings
Interaction with them is dangerous
Even with a brush
One can catch the contagion of ill conformity
There is no method for aversion
We're continually besieged by
The Invalids

How is a ****
Pin-up model
Any different than
Some Renaissance painting
Yet one is a vulgarity
And one is art

Human beings have both
A fascination with eroticism
And some sort of moral obligation
To censor themselves from it

I have been forced to conclude
That the stark reality of the photography
Frightens people
They want to hide
In their catholicized self-made world

I have been forced to conclude
These people are morally weak
(Those that cover the model)
Unable to stow away
Fantasy for Reality
They cannot differentiate
Between their lover and the model
Their mind pursues the physical
Ignoring the romantic

They starve themselves
From such images
Because they cannot
Overcome such lust

While those of true strength
Can view the ******
In all its artistic
And pornographic qualities,
See the physical perfection
And imprint upon it
A mental perfection
Yet turn their backs
On the illusion
While others
Simply shun one illusion
For another.

I never tire of being here
Having suppressed all of my childish fears
And I hate when I have to leave
I wish that I could never leave
But your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone

My wounds are just starting to heal
So much pain I no longer feel
There's just so much Your Love has to erase

And I cried You’d wipe away all of my tears
When I’d scream You'd fight away all of my fears
And you’ll hold my hand through all of these years
You’ll always have
All of me

You still captivate me
By your resonating life
I'm bound by the thoughts you've put in my mind
Your face graces
My once fitful dreams
Your voice it chased away
The insanity in me

My wounds are starting to heal
So much pain I no longer feel
There's just so much Your Love has to erase

And I cried You’d wipe away all of my tears
When I’d scream You'd fight away all of my fears
And you’ll hold my hand through all of these years
You’ll always have
All of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself You’ll never leave
I’m sorry that I’ve been so weak
It took so long but now
I believe

I think of You and I see the yellow
Of a raincoat, keeping me dry and warm
You’re good at that, wrapping around me tightly
Your arms like the weathered belt
Hands knotted across my stomach
And the rain-soaked hood
Lightly lapping at my cheek
Not unlike your kiss
The drawstrings tumble down
Like Your hair across my chest
But unlike the raincoat
Which will inevitably, ironically
Soak me when I go to take it off
You will always be my shelter
I could never hang You up.

What would I have found myself with

Had I looked up from the ashes

That my life had become

And seen no one there to help me up?

What mountain could I have traversed

Without you, and you, and you to allow me to be heard

Loving you like lovers

There could never be another

Of each and every one of you

And I plainly see

The bits of all of you in me

Like compass points and northern stars

Guiding me along the way

Sweeping up my shattered, still beating heart

Raining on my rainy day.

Hours and days sped by
Never stopping to linger
For a few blessed moments
A week and a few weekends
That were barely there
A little bit of growing up
And a lot of life
And the same difficulties
That I’ve always faced
And that we’ll face
Time and time again

I dream of you sometimes still
I confess
At how things ended between us
Of bitterness
Wondering how something so good soured
So Fast
Nostalgic at the times we had and that you
Couldn't last
But in the melancholy I
Won’t wallow
And while endings are bitter pills, this one's not so difficult
To swallow
And I know I won't miss all the trivial games
You played
Because in my nightmare you didn't leave
You stayed

I want to sit by a city window
At night

And stare out into the lights
With you

From the top floor of a darkened
Hotel

I want to wrap my arms
Around you

Rest my chin on your
Shoulder

Sigh and pull you
Closer

And simply sit as the lights
Twinkle

Into the heart of the city and
Never sleep.

Cacophony and oblivion
Sounds, “music”
And I use the term loosely
Is all you will ever find here
The last vestiges of melody
Being attacked, killed
Any lyric, rhythm
Evanesces.

Ready your soap
Your water
Your ears are about to be
Polluted
Your head
Invaded, trashed.
Any thought left for dead.

And all we are
Are Noise Machines
And all we’ll ever find
Are Noise Machines

Every once in a while,
When I think of your smile,
My brain will compile
All the dreams that I had for you.

And then there are days,
When I think of the gaze,
And the lovely craze,
With which I saw you.

But so it would seem,
These thoughts stay in a dream,
And though I wanted to scream,
It’s just not going to happen.

But I thank you for your time,
Your inspiration to rhyme,
I love you as a friend,
And that, will never end.

In school we learn to be
Not intuitive nor ambitious
Or creative even
In school we learn to take
Not the path with the
Most vibrant colors
But the flattest one.
College is charged
With the castration of young minds
And too often we forget
Just what is left behind
Do I want to write this essay
On the interesting or the easy

You’ve known Her far longer
I confess I am a little jealous
And you might think that makes your bond stronger
But let’s not get over zealous

You get to spend so much more time with Her than I
Every waking minute if you really wanted to
I know how you’ve shaped the Girl that I call mine
And I’ll never love Her like you do

But know, You’ll never Love her like I do

Why must my lips speak
A melody my fingers can play
Must I weaken your ear
When I can weaken your knees?
Looks and sounds are nice
But feelings are beter
Why stumble over three words
When I can double your pleasure with
The featherlight touch of my fingertips
Words are so mundane
I would rather profane a moment with the
Unyeilding touch, the gift
Of all I have and have to give
To live with you wrapped, no curled
(my fingers, your toes),
No, gripping my fingers
Gasping the same way you did
When you were first given life
And given again
To arch and release, to obscene
The silence with the tell tale
Whimpering of two and too
Pleasurable
If there were ever such a thing.
I want to bring you to the edge
And hold you there, begging with
Your eyes, your lips, for sweet release
For your hands
To search for comforting firmness
For something to hold
All the while, inexorable circles
Of a lover’s touch, driving the point
Home like words cannot
Your lips and body making an ‘O’
I don’t have to say it, not now
Not that it would register,
I can give it
You can feel it
This is spiritual, this is everything
The apex of physiology, biology,
Of romance
Happiness brought in ways we could only
Previously imagine
Base instincts take over
(yet still only third)
Curling, my fingers, your toes
And it’s so intense, so beautiful
The three words seem so childish
So understated
Compared to this moment
Calling for a deity a thousand times
What else brings such passion?
Certainly not words, sweet as they can be
And it’s everything, Anything
I feel for you and you for me
In one moment
One moment
One moment
Slays three words
They’re one and the same
I won’t say it, not with my lips
(maybe later)
But you cannot deny the power of
The feelings
And what we do and have done
And will do
A small part of us
But for a moment, everything
Slayer of words
Crumbler of walls
Screams and moans
Pants and breaths, never to be found
Today two years, and a hundred and six days
All in one moment
Tomorrow should you so choose
One hundred and seven
The words can’t hold it all
Can’t hold what I feel for you
But *******
And many heartbeats can
It’s a gift.
It’s everything I have for you
And I’m giving it to you
For a moment, thirty seconds
However long it takes
For the breaths and the heartbeat
And the moans to rise to a ******
And gradually fall
Reveling in the moment, the Love
We’re not fools
No matter what they call it.

I want this song played
Someday.
When I dance with you
On a lonely floor.
Dressed all in white.
Smiling.
Just as I lift your veil.
Just as I meet your eyes.
Just as I kiss you.
I want that chorus to start.
Like it did when I fell in love.

“Cause every time we touch,
I get this feeling,
And every time we kiss,
I swear I can fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast?
I want this to last,
I need you by my side.
'Cause every time we touch,
I feel the static,
And every time we kiss,
I reach for the sky.
Can't you hear my heart beat so?
I can't let you go,
I want you in my life.”

I paint
People are my canvas
And I paint

I cover up the imperfections
Caulk the cracks
And I paint

I paint
Purple circles
Lines of agony
And I paint

And I paint
Greys and browns
Against peach and tan
Striking red
Against pink
And I paint

Dark
And I paint

Samantha, parted from me and never parted
Never and always, touching and touched
I seek never to finish what we so eagerly started
Laying yet standing, looking not seeing
One after the other, crying and agreeing
Covered in snow through sunny skies
Happily while a weak bond dies
And our time together is long but fleeting
Ours is all I can imagine being
I wish to be closed off, so clearly unguarded
Time with You always and never enough
Samantha, parted from me and never parted.

How strange that we should find such beauty in
The withering of that which sustains us
That the reds and the yellows and the browns
Should give a sense of rejuvenation
When they will merely signify the end
Until the laws of the earth will claim them
Leaving only lifelessness to survey

So quickly the world turns beauty to ash
Stripping the flash of our utopia
Rendering dreams we touch to silhouettes
Grasping at the wisps of the fading past
We are left with only brushed fingertips

Though the white is the ending of it all
I will remain entranced within the fall

I'd like to pay the Piper
For him to whistle me home
To saddle me with the consequence
For a lifetime spent alone
But the sound of retribution
Always rings cold and stiff
And there'll be no compensation
For this life I've been living with

Angel, sweet whisperings
Crashing upon my deaf ears
I wish to hear your harmonies
I wish to take comfort in your embrace, but
There is no rest for lidless eyes
In no sleep will we meet
Unfound in peerless dreams

Somehow I find
Broken hearts don't bleed
And I thought that I had lost
Some things I'd no longer see

Wandering along in life
Devoid of certain parts
Wondering what I'd find anew
And when I could restart

But now it's time I think
To lay siege to certain things
Reclaim that which I'd lost
And end the recovering.

So I think that now the pieces will be returning
Certain fires doused, and others remain burning

I'm ready to love again
To **** again
Though not one without the other
Back scars and
Beating hearts
Pressed together
How deep can your fingernails dig?
I want to hear you whisper my name
I want you to take my hand
And pull me into the storm
Ignoring the deluge
And the cacophony
Nevermind the rain
Your eyelashes are enough to shield us
Smile, or smirk
I really don't care
So long as you kiss like you mean it
Pulling me close until it hurts
Don't bite your lip
I'll do it for you
As you look on in ecstasy
Love me until it physically hurts
Love can't hurt me

I’ve been swaying in the wind
On this lonely swing
Like I’ll never reach the shore again
Like I’ll never reach, anything

My hand’s been slippin off this knot
And it burns so much
And I’ve been givin all I’ve got
But it’s not enough

Chorus:
I’m jumping in
I’m letting go
I don’t want to hang here no more
I lost my grip
And I’m falling fast
Just promise me that this will last

I can feel myself sliding down
Towards You My Dear
And I’ll tell You know, I don’t know why
I’m still hanging here

Chorus:
I’m jumping in
I’m letting go
I don’t want to hang here no more
I lost my grip
And I’m falling fast
Just promise me that this will last

I promise Babe, to immerse myself
In Your Love
And I’ll turn to You when I need help
You’re enough

Chorus:
I’m jumping in
I’m letting go
I don’t want to hang here no more
I lost my grip
And I’m falling fast
Just promise me that this will last

To share with You, this great divide
And not to grieve at the miles
I want to hold You in my arms tonight
But I know that time will be a while

I could say that the dreams are better
But that defies intelligence
Nothing compares to when we lie together
The memories overshadowed by the sense

Every night I wish You here
Though here, You cannot be
Yet now I live without fear
That You’re so far away from me

This is a way of Love in Our rough season
This side of madness, the other side of reason

Running blind
That’s what they call it
How sad is it
I can even fall without falling
Calling your name
But I don’t even have that
Merely an echo in my head
A vague impression
Thoughts and dreams

Who are you
I find myself asking
I can almost touch you
But I don’t even know your name
I’ve felt your presence for a while now
I confess
I know you’ve been close all along
My soul mate
Yet I remain in ignorance
Running blind, as they say
And still running

I don’t know that I’ve ever been so shattered
Felt a hole in myself quite like the one you dug
To think of losing what really matters
Ending what I thought had barely begun

Sunk to hours, crying in bathroom stalls
Hoping that I could somehow hide my tears
Aimlessly wandering darkened halls
Losing the battle to quell my deepest fears

They say you don’t know what you have until it’s lost
I always knew what a crock of **** that really was
I didn’t need 48 hours of being a ghost
To know that what we have is really love

I had thought I couldn’t live without You
Or you without me.  

Now I guess we know.

I am stalking silence
Shadowing it but
Remaining ever at a distance
Every once in a while
My silhouette falls upon it
But it eludes me always

I can remain in silence
In the hopes it’ll seek the company
And every once in a while
It’ll grace me with its presence
Unbroken until
Some Samaritan decides
I need saving from its grasp
But I seek comfort in it
I revel in it
Not brooding
Sweet solitude
Sweet silence

You say that I don’t smile enough
That I never seem happy
When the truth is
I’ve never been more at peace with myself
And the life going on around me

It must seem like I’m thoroughly unimpressed
With what it is You have to offer
But that couldn’t be more wrong
I smiled when You laid Your head down on my chest
Your eyes were shut.
So were mine.
But I knew You were happy

Maybe You’re looking at things the wrong way
I mean I don’t kiss You because I’m happy
I’m happy because I’ve kissed You
Happiness doesn’t bring Love
Love brings happiness
And Yours brings Volumes

Take the picture, living life
Snap the shutter suddenly
Poses are lies, etched in time
Candid captures the honesty
I can see the smile
I can almost hear the laugh
You can’t freeze what’s already frozen
Cracked smiles are so empty
I prefer the depth of the unexpected flash
Preserve not the event itself
Preserve the memory, the emotion
Snap the shutter when I’m not looking
The best thing in life, you don’t even see happen
At least
Not in the moment.

What the hell am I doing with my life?
Kind of just letting it happen for now
Drifting through without a defined purpose
As though fate will somehow carry me towards
The blissful future my shaded eyes see
Only shaded eyes, like seeing specters
I guess divine comfort is only that

Still I method act out the optimist
Some parts of yourself cannot be escaped
I can’t help but feel her breath on my neck
And whispering sensations on my skin
Thinking soon I will play nomad no more

Seeing the ***** thoughts she undresses
Through parting lips and silent caresses

I want to be the one
Left behind without my kind

I want to be the one
That weathers the storm

The one with the umbrella
Raining above and raining under

I want to be the one
In black upon the hill

I want to be the one
Laying flowers

I want to be the one
Saddled with that burden

I can handle grief
But causing those to grieve
That I cannot handle
I want to be the last to go

I can look myself in the mirror
Without recrimination
Knowing the events that have shaped my life
These past few months
Haven't changed me all that much
That you can place your hands
And still feel the vibrations
That what was lost was merely let go
And what wasn't there, wasn't lost
That I haven't succumbed
To the cynicism and bitterness
So easily wallowed in
But the incomprehensible cannot be stopped
It is still there

This is a place I’ve never been
A point with someone never traveled to
I’ve hit that wall over and again
But, finally, I’ve broken through with You

You’re like a never wandered path for me
With flowers growing all along the side
And I marvel at the beauty that I see
Taking my sweet time as I stroll by

This is a place I’ve never seen
I’m no longer walking scared
And I think Your Sweet Sixteen
Is a memory that’s best when shared

It’s certainly a birthday of significance
And yet it’s not the sixteen that makes it sweet
It’s that I’ve been given the blissful chance
To make You as happy as You make me

Some say that True Love is impossible
That Soulmates are simply too hard to find
And some say that dreamin on a Dream Girl
Is nothing but a waste of my time

Well some say long distance just doesn’t work
That the miles will tear Us apart
Some say I’m better off looking elsewhere
But I let the right Girl into my heart

Some would say that I’m a fool that’s dreaming
That I can’t possibly know You’re the one
Some say I’ll find someone better some day
But I know My Girl’s second to none

I’m not sure what they are saying now
Your loving words are all I want to hear
I found The One for the rest of my life
I promise I’ll always Love You my Dear

Sometimes I am, at moments
Lost within myself
Taking refuge in the ruins
The utopia of my own creation

Limiting conversation
To different shades and colors
Unhinged soliloquys
Bickering amongst each other

I dream my own dreams
In a strange way
The creation causes the fantasy...causes the creation
So attainable, so intangible

I could spend days lost in this trance
Until my limbs begin to shake
Repeating this motionless dance
Night after night and day after day

With You on your back, looking up
Brown rays streaming from Your face
Time spent with You is so abrupt
Yet it’s like I’ve never left Your embrace

And I know we’ve spent hours in this bed
Yet the feeling never seems to tire
Pushing out the fear of what lies ahead
As my hands stroke your face and the fire

I need to write again
Channel my manic depressive side
Put my heart on paper
Maybe it’ll come alive

I need to scrawl
Heartfelt couplets of despondency
I need to tumble down
The abyss to familiarity

I need to seek it out
Cavernous depths have strayed too long
I can hear the demons marching
I can hear them sing my song

I need to envelop myself
In the blanket of despair
Then, oh maybe then
I will inhale fresher air

I lay my head down
On two curvaceous soft pillows
Taking in the scent
Of long brown strands of potpourri
While the gentle thumping
Matches the pace of my breaths
Like us, I fall and rise
Your heavy warmth surrounding my legs
Mattress, blanket, pillow all in one
I hold You tight.

Look into the crowd and see the smiles
There is genuine happiness abound
Now We stand here after all the miles
Bells are ringing.  Is there a sweeter sound?

Look at the flowers, effervescent reds
Contrasting with Your flowing pristine white
Your loveliness, it turns so many heads
Oh how lovely I’ll make You feel tonight

Look into my eyes, and see tears of bliss
See dreams that are finally coming true
I never thought that things could come to this
And yet with You, somehow I always knew

I whisper, from the bottom of my heart
In happiness, ‘til death do Us part.

What's the point of waking
Only to be lost in the monotony of masses
Extraordinary is a myth, days blur
And time only passes

Trudge through the doldrums again
Unseen through shaded glasses
No one sees uniquities
And time only passes

And what of the broken wishes?
Teardrops roll down eyelashes
There's no escape fighting fate
And time only passes

What is it exactly, what does it mean?
To me, to You, to Our relationship.
Reliance on a person, by the book.
But, my dear, I Love You much more than books
Trust is my unwavering confidence,
My ability to give you my heart
And know, know without a doubt in the world

That it will always be safe with You, Babe.
And trust is knowing deep within myself
That even when in our darkest moments
And when the world has turned its back on You
You’ll turn your back on it, and turn to me.
I trust you’ll let me catch You when You fall.
Baby, I trust You Love me most of all

Some don't understand what home is
Speaking of our city with derision
They just don't get it
And sure, people have left in droves
It isn't what it used to be
But nowhere do I feel
The sense of contentment
That I do there
I've never fit anywhere
But in Buffalo I do
My heart understands what home is
Where it beats a little softer
Where I breathe a little deeper
Walk a little slower
Smile a little more
"The reasons
They don't seem legitimate when you say them aloud
But in your heart.
There's something real here."

So tragic, these acts of violence
And one only begets another
Blood for blood and the river quickens
Now turbid with days no longer seen
Too weak are we to do what must be done?
Too weak are we to throw the switch?
Or is weakness ill-defined?
It is so easy to **** another man
Harder to be introspective
For some the most difficult thing
To look into, to appraise, is a mirror
Are we too weak if not enough die
If vengeance for the fallen is left unfulfilled
Or are we too weak if we don't stop it?

Ever see someone and be blown away
Even though it’s a year, a month and several days
Since the one she first said yes?

Yet I sit here, heart beating no less
Faster and harder
When all of a sudden things
Have gone better and farther
Than the heights I thought I’d reach
But what’s stunning is I’ve so much more to learn
And You have so much more to teach
When our eyes lock in that gaze
Your Love envelopes me
And avoids the clichés
Never did I think my demons could be disbanded
Or know that I could have so much
While still being empty handed
But not empty hearted
While it’s amazing that we’ve only just started
And I often look ahead
There’s no where I’d rather be
Than right here, right now
In this bed.

I was looking at the rain
Thinking of You
Thinking of women
And I could only see the rain
Where the pine tree stood as a backdrop

And women now are like the rain
Invisible, but for that one
Where there’s some depth
Something behind the beauty
And that my dear
Is where you come in

I've lent a hand
In times of need
Shouldering their pain
Shouldering their tears
Bearing the brunt of depression
Second listing my own childish fears
Giving, not grieving
Til I swore my heart had wings
Guardian of those I could shelter with them
An angel in no such terms
But an Angel nonetheless
Seeing the needing through
The all too near reaper
Claiming those we held dear
Sometimes hiding, and others
Keeping him from claiming another
Cuts and blood and quietness
Withered and weathered
I've seen them, felt them
Held them, beat them
Reaching out, trying to give solace
And I've come out ahead
Many claimed, but the two remained
And now I remain
Changed, but the same
Smiling that I've seen those I cherish
Or cherished
Through their trials
I want to be a savior
Though never called one
And I find myself
Completing another cycle
Seemingly no closer
No more learned
Forcing me to wonder
To ask
To ***** for the comforting embrace
Of white wings
Who Saves Me?

I often exist
In woken dreams
Creating things
I'll never see

Living lives
That are only myths
Ignoring what
I'm living with

Tis better in
The fantasies
Reality's just
A broken dream

I just want something to come home to
Words
A little picture of happiness.
Something to make the empty echoes
Of a lone heart beating
A little softer

Over and over
Again my eyes flitting side to side
A smile, maybe
No promises.
Just words.
A lover’s repose

I want something to wake up to
Words
A little picture of happiness
Something to jumpstart the tired dull thuds
Of a lone heart weakening

To pull my lidless shades
Up a little
Corner of my mouth upturning
Maybe
No promises.
Just words
A lover’s invigoration.

I want something to let my heart sing to
Words
Harmonized throughout my day
Something to make the beating
Prevail
A little longer

To draw myself
Through life’s difficulties
A scant crescent
Maybe
No Promises.
Just words.
A Lover’s Endurance.

Winter and death
Are supposed to go hand in hand
Crumbling brown leaves
Scattered around barren trees
And the days evanesce
Colder, shorter, darker
But the snow brightens the night
Every vestige of light reflecting skyward

Winter is indicative of change
A monochrome contrast to fall
An ending of a year
But all that crosses my mind
Is me, you, a blanket and a fire

And what comforts me
Is the pillar of certainty
Amongst the chaos
It’s disturbing
How quickly things fade away
But what comforts me
Is that my Love for You never will

And every snow flake that falls
Reminds me of how I fell for You
And every darkened night
Your arms or Your voice will hold me tight
Every cold shudder
Will be met with Your warming touch

And what comforts me.
Is Your Pillar of Certainty