Clouded by thoughts
Repressed them inside.
Never showing it,
With a Nonchalant face
Showing a nonchalant life.

The back of my mind,
A dark dangerous place.
Before I walk back there,
Numb yourself,
To numb my life.

I cloud my thoughts
Before I go inside.
Drinking to show,
Never to live.
Make them see,
My nonchalant face,
So they see,
My nonchalant life.

If you’ve ever seen me
Felt or heard from me,
There has been nothing
Impossible as it goes by
As it clears up and you see
The feeling has almost ceased.

If I ever saw you
Felt or heard,
There was something
Almost impossible as it stroke me
Somebody who I could see
And felt that pleasuring feeling.

People don’t belong to people
Bonding as if they belong together
The moments that seem to last forever
Unforgettable as a habit
Unchanging as time goes by
The images I create
The feelings that I made

Who has never been seen
Never been heard from.
Almost like they never exists
When existence is all we have
Was it real?
What was real?
Am I crazy?
Or just a lonely nobody.
Somebody who never existed.

From someone who exists
To someone who may had existed
Or to you who doesn’t know they exist
The beyond is Infinite as death is inevitable,
Time goes by as it goes.
Forevermore,
As nevermore.
Never forget,
You exist.

Why the heart wants the unobtainable.
I long for that meaning.
It gains nothing.
It tears the insides.
It hurts.
Only in silence I cry
Gaining nothing,
Only hurting.
It seems like eons have passed,
Times by the times again,
I end lying here.
Silently in pain,
Masking the days.
I lose hope.
It only hurts,
Nothing gained.
Only in silence,
Only to pain.

To picture my life differently...
To dream that better life,
I can't cope with this.
Forcing that change,
I destroy my future.

Happy days,
Happy dreams.
I'm stuck in my head
But when I drink those drinks...
I am free

It's no wonder why I'm alone.
How can others love me,
When one hates themselves?
Still in the past,
Nothing has changed.

I dream of a home,
Only to dream.
I drink to be free,
Only it burns.
It's no wonder why I'm alone.

Hello brother...
I hope you are happy
up in the clouds...
high above the sadness...

I am still here...
holding on...
hoping for the open future...
I am trying....
to hold on.

I try....
as doubtfulness falls down my eyes...
It doesnt matter how far our story goes...
it just matters how its told...