The sun in my eyes I look up and see
Into forever, I breath deeply
Pulling all the air in
Trying not to let go but it's leaking
I keep looking up-into forever,
The sky is a pale sapphire,
I keep trying to take in each breath
God teaching me, needle, getting even
-higher

Here I stand, a joke, the laughter in my ears,
From everyone who tells me I'm just another of
Those loser queers. A mockery, a beast,
Just an animal to say the least.
I can see when I'm not wanted, don't
Know how many times they've called
My name. Can tell when I've been
Spotted, been lost time and time
Again.

So I sit still, a vagabond, a little over-shocking,
Less and less come to my door, and almost
Always theirs a knocking. I can't recall who
I was, a blurry face in the crowd.
Now I'm always here because, I stand
Out in the misty shroud. I can never be
Heard, yet all can say my name.
Always the loudest booming voice,
Even if I'm "extremely plain."

And so I ask the world, why am I still here?
I've got no one who understands my needs,
No not one far or near. I guess in time I'll
Disappear like everyone knows I should,
Though if you have an itch you'll scratch it,
Even if they find out, like I always know you would...

Everyday lives begin the same, with everyday peoples dreams,
Those who know everyday seasons promise us all our needs,
Unspoken 'til they know them, as natures heart still bleeds.

Before anything we choose, we just made a fatal error,
For anyone here that knows, just had a "Vegas" marriage
And then we find our future filled with wars of terror.

Everyday lives begin with a bang, planting future seeds,
People who hear the rumors spread them before you speak,
Spoken "exactly" as they heard you, as if your words cannot be.

Before anything we choose, we just made a fatal error,
For anyone here that knows, yet another broken marriage
And then we find our future filled with wars of terror.

Quietly softly ferns fields, wheat cool smooth crisp clear skies and Sun, delicious meal. Gentle light soothing ray wondrous' Universe Of coming day. Smooth sunshine pushing fern And pine sweet smell of hickory today. Fresh water uplifts Spirit Antlers preened tended to flock birds and Water crest. Valley field stream droplets of pure gold light and flown. Disappearing Into the thick brush Eagles Spirit is shown. Tipi cools offers new light to upcoming Fire to stay warm and keep it going, under Pure leaf of almond colour hides a gold Feather sweeping winds blown crushing it To the forest ground and letting in the  Light...

The laughter fills the basketball court
As the swing sets chains ring and the slides are hot,
All desks are turned towards the chalkboard
The sun beating down on the cafeteria and lots,
As the pencils tap and all of the art is displayed,
Only the grass is soft enough for the shoes
Which sits by the trees and fences which fade.
Old are the backgrounds of trees and leaf and roots
Of flowers and birds and bumblebees,
Amidst cans of soda and pizza sitting on trays,
The smell so delicious wafting in the breeze,
A fantastic feast for my "merely normal" childhood days...

Your hair is like white snow, filling my field of view
With this beautiful sky of clouds over our heads,
Up and on into forever they shall climb,
Bringing our imagined dreams to life we can't forget.

You sit upon the grass, your the only thing standing
Between loneliness, I feel a stab in my throat,
Like I cannot bring to words how I feel (the "M" word)
Before you find out what I really want to know.

You see, I made this song, it's about our kingdom
About you and me, my heart dances, I want to know,
Is there any place for this song bird who's sung,
If it is caged then where do all the notes go?

Forever consumed in fire and death, our lives are filled with fear,
Listen to the war general, he'll stop the bad guys far and near,
Do you hear me calling? I have the answers! He shall say,
But listen to me closely, fools will follow him each day.

The bullets you use shall once again be trained upon your head,
Your body will be lifeless, listless, once they find you dead,
But follow the wartime dreamers! They have found the way,
They will keep our paths clear, keep violent terrorists away.

I've done my best and at any rate I've gone and shared my views,
That wartime efforts and it's strife has long time been abused,
But people will never learn, and on they will "make a change,"
One that's "good," one that's "needed," but they are actually insane.

Insanity-doing the same thing over and over each year, each decade, and expecting different or better results over time.

If I had a dime for every blank picture I drew,
I'd be the richest man alive, my feelings etched
And the pain still fresh and new. I'd give up on
Art or photos or music just to work 9-5,
But it wouldn't change me the same way as
Being different, one of the eccentric guys.
I've been a dreamer for years and years, and all the
"Real winners" just watch sports on the couch and
Drink beers! If anything this would seem like a down-
Grade to those in the past, how we make what they call
"Disney magic" last, but it's our right to be a slob,
To ruin our language with "ain't that car a beaut, Bob?"
But sadly to say the real harm has already been done,
And when it comes to paying the piper,
The ignorant gold diggers will be amidst the chosen ones.

To You, Wherever You Are...
I am back home, but my heart is still torn apart! Where is your call, where is Your voice? That ring that I love that came from above, with you I could do anything I could ever dream of...

See you around,
Anywhere is best,
Wherever my love
Will ever find rest...

It's a lovely wish to be in your world,
I would fly high in my heart, if I could
Just be your special loving "girl".

I know it's been long, but how long it
Seems! It seems such a waste, If you'd
Just invite me into your arms embrace...

There is strength in unity,
In finding a community,
For those who love and care,
There are places for us all,
To live and be productive there
To shine like the sun,
Planets and stars in unison
All add up to us as one.

There is no time for war,
For it's not the place to grow,
Nor does it bring any safety,
Until we all learn this is so
We'll never be truly free,
And never find each other
Even if we fight for a dream,
Killing will bring no unity.

There was once a man who's hands were stained with oil
And at church he was taught of being kind,
How it's wrong that men are enslaved and toil
And that God frees all slaves in time.
But he wouldn't give to the poor
-And never found a reason to ask why,
Then he stole gold from the land as never before
And enslaved the lands peoples lives.
But there was once a man that aimed the slaves be set free,
He would speak out in order to save the slaves
And he'd fight for their victory
So that Africa's heart would be saved.
And never ever was the tree to have life again
Until Africa's heart was set free,
He must free the lands people then
From sea to shining sea.
And never ever would the spirits thrive again
Until he led her people to overcome,
Her children must be given life once again
Africa's children must be given our love.

What if this was just any other love poem?
Addicted to fame and fortune many "make it big,"
Another love song just like any other, stands alone
As yet another love poem, a be mine, baby baby jig.
Let's give them something new, something with life,
Not stuck in the past, some bar tab to remember me by.
Listless, sitting over the rail, looking for that one day
To come where there is an art or music director guy,
One who remembers your name, so that everyone in
Town speaks about what it would be like to share your fast times,
But it's not real, selling "8 track tapes full of trucker music," while
Ordinary poets and musicians like me are alone on Valentines...

One day I was thinking to myself,
After all the things I've been told,
I don't think that for the world I'd
Give up my dream, even to the death
I'll keep going until I get old.
If I told you what my dream was you'd laugh
or be angry at me, but then again,
Whoever understood me would be
Few and far between, and so this is truly
How my lonely struggle came to be.
Well, I guess I've said enough already,
or have I really?
The world is filled with people making a "change,"
shooting in war, violence, building walls, working
Too much, being alone in a corner, shades, strange.
"One day they will get theirs!" I say-but lucky for them,
They have a whole lot of padding and cushion
So they can just keep bellying up to the bar again
And again and again...

That's still you, under the makeup, behind the eyeshadow,
That's still you, behind the shadow of the tree, tired of the sun,
That's still you, placing the "daily bread" before "god's holy throne,"
That's still you, playing the flute, filled with frivolity but cursing the rain.
That's still you, before the "sacred" alter, picking a ring-a man-made stone.
That's still you, and do you know what? You'll never grow up until you are the real you again...

I was born in West Valley Utah on a Labor day,
My mother said she would take me there after May.
So we went there when I was around about eight,
And it was then that I got to observe the Great Salt Lake.
In all my childhood travels before I'd never known
Something that looked like snow but wasn't cold.
It just looked like sand and I was amazed I was told,
That sailing on this lake wasn't possible for boats.
But I'd seen where I came from yet couldn't make out
That this was by my birthplace, a great salt so pale,
Thus my knowledge of my dawn was brought about
That I was born by a lake one only dreams to set sail.

Why do they still believe that from one beer
All light was made? Why give thanks to this one deity,
A being of drunken faith? Before all time I was convinced
they knew the way, but now I question more and more
the meaning of what they seek and why they prey.
Giving in to temptation is all too easy now, why I
Could find a thousand sellers selling people out!
Peddling to pushers, giving drugs in stores, why would
We need all this glitter giving THEM GALORE? They get
The beer glass over flowing, the cowboys in the stands
And the guns that shoot much better, made by drunken
Hands. So remember what I say, remember it if you will,
Simplicity is a virtue, for rich pockets it wont fill.

I thought it was over too soon,
The rain pulled the jacket back
Slick pouring out over my head
The letter rain drenched, ink flows
All across the colors blend, drops of
Rain splotched purple and black,
And your eyes telling me of lack,
But it wasn't over. The sound of wind
Rushed through the trees, carried your song
Across fields, through streams and valleys,
As though it could forever go all along
Whistling in with the rhythm of the driven seas,
Chanting with the birds across the way,
Waves channel it through earth and stone
And cracks between the gorges and cliffs,
Telling me it was going to be hard, alone,
Still not entirely certain that we'd fit, the light dim,
Further on the faded light and rushing waves,
Rain pouring until sundown, and a foggy mist sets in
In the sky just beyond the hills in lovely grays.

We have our special song,
It's here in my heart.
I've played it until dawn,
As you well know, it's my part.
I play our song on the Piano
And our music is sensational.
Our song is a melody unlike others,
No one has written it but
US and it's called Soft Rain.
When I give you the note to our sweet
Song you will lose your built up pain.
And my love, ours is an undying flame.
We've flown up to the sun and touched it,
Swam to the oceans bottom and were drenched
By it, and thus from the sky comes soft rain.
I love you my dear and
I play it each year,
It keeps you fresh and in my
Heart-once more I'll Be near

Whenever I hear the rain tapping,
Pulsing like a heartbeat, the cars tires sloshing
Pulling each torrent of water in every direction,
And sending drops flying like tiny clear pearls.
The wind like an invisible giant bends on a large tree
As the speeding train comes the cross lights flash
As red beaming orbs, like a heartbeat, off and on, off,
And so on a fast car slows so you can see forever as
Someone emerges, soon from beneath its window pane.
A dog barks and a lady screams, and then the rain,
Gleaming as the red flashing lights,
Slows to a drizzle.

The tankards rest on the table as at an inn,
People sit and eat bread and it's noisy.
I fumble with my new shoes and jerkin
With a muffin cap that I don proudly.
I'm newly dressed in old borrowed clothes
And I run outside and see the Dance Macabe in rags.
While the Faire's parade comes close,
I can see the clouds in the sky blow like white grey flags.
Surrounded by endless hubbub my face beaming
Like the sun shedding light,
I'm smiling from ear to ear
As the man in the moon does at night.

My shoes lie
by the endless field
in dusty plight

On foot, several soldiers in camouflage with flares ignite
A blaze of bright red sparklers, parting the thick murky haze,
Enough at least so that we could be seen, waiting for a
Helicopter to get to the rocket for my journey Into space.
I climb inside, they load up the cargo bay with supplies
And then 8...7...6...5...came the countdown and when it
Came down to it, I felt like putting my head between
My knees as the combustion sent the rockets from 2nd
Gear into 5th. As the flooding white light of nuclear bombs
Lit the sky I was sent hurtling up at maximum speed,
Beyond that of sound-and then total silence-so I check
The air tanks air and the fluid dispenser for water supply,
Only in minutes did I realize how many were gone, only
In seconds did everything die.

I am forever yours, before all time is done
I am the one who's there, cause my heart you also won,
I am the one who dreams, for dreamers cannot die
I am the one for you, so please remember my eyes

You were the one I chased, and always know I need.
You are the wishing daisy, and I pick off every leaf.
You will be in my prayers, your spirit's still my home.
You will be in my thoughts, no matter what they know.

I am still the raven, and waiting for my crow.

I have known a silent seashore and been to it so far,
By the deep sea it was like my being in front of a car,
Until it came toward me then I never knew
Before the storm that life could be so cruel to you.

I have needed love and called to reach out for help,
Like an obsessed addict wondering who I should tell.
I wondered what love was and why it hurt,
Before the storm I never knew my heart would burst.

I never knew the pain I'd have next
When my dearest sweetest love left.
Before then I didn't know of the hurt that drills too far,
Before the storm I was not aware from the start.

But now in the end I'm certainly not free
I'm as helpless as I ever could be.
At first I'd hoped love would come to my door,
Before the storm I wasn't aware that my calm seashore would be done for.

Porridge be forsworn, the lemons escaped again!
If mules had rags, they would be plums, and not
A fig would shriek. In all dreamy pompousness the
Voodoo doll is a whimsical wine beggar in tips,
Before the cart of chocolate dairy pigs get a spank
For having left my wing in a toasting lower than
It SHOULD HAVE BEEN. And don't forget the doorknob
Has feelings for Mrs. Fairy-Warts, GOD HELP THEM
ALL!!! And moose, do you smell something burning?
I'll be a pin cushion, you've grown a flaming
Donkey's nose! Only three and five inches long...

OK! First the lollipop in the jar is missing
And her feet are itchy, help us please...
There's a cow doing cartwheels?
And if I might ask did your pigeon sneeze?
Reels of footage were left in the turkey baster,
Am I wrong? You obviously don't hear lemons
Whistling though, of course. And these days the
Emporer of Donutland is poor, better send him
Another hammed cannery of doom, let alone two.
And this TV has too many billygoats fishing!
And I'll be monster,
She did grow a hat!
Only minus the notes.
Just as big smoking jerky,
BLINDING, teeth raising...!
Chewing itself a thrill.

I'm surrounded in the asteroid belts so near,
Hails of them crash into a desolate moonlit crest.
Then I find myself floating in the stratosphere,
My space shuttle floating in the darkness,
Somewhere behind me. I see clouds I am flying past,
Towards the ground, even plumeting soundless.
In all my fear I'm astonished. I have healthy plants!
Well, ready for the greenhouse, my survival.
I can see my shadow on the ground as I land-
My capsule, I find myself surrounded by magma falls.
My stomach comes up. I crawl out. I lift myself free.
The ruby volcanic lava gushes and melts everything.
This is only proof of all wars hopes and endless vanity;
I've found what's left of our earth, too late to dream.

Hello tree people, kings, figs and newts,
We delight inexplicably, mice and toads!
Under loud moons that wreak of pools,
Before greasy footsteps into knights and lions.
And loudly dwindles the extreme crown pig,
The reality hardship of all sun and crowd.
Forgotten mishap rulers that apply inch worms,
And a staff of quails, jesters, and pawns.
Sence to sentances, prison rain druming, squeeks.
Filthy boring evaporating with kangaroo shorts,
Cut half tall.

I so love the wind
Blowing through the tall palm trees
In sleepy cool shade

Whatever I do, however far I try to go,
There is always darkness, my life is
Restrained, nothing but a fading rainbow,
And there is nothing that changes,
Searching for a sign, I follow
What my dream says, and lose all track
of keeping in line...

If this life is just a burning candle,
Some stupid cliche' that just withered
And died overnight, if the burning torch
Will be there even after I have lost my light,
I don't care, you aren't here so now I live in despair?
So very distant, like a mist, a cloud in the empty air.

What I want to know, and what you will never say,
Is how each day gets longer the further you're away,
I reach out to touch, but my hands find empty air,
The only thing that I can feel is that you aren't there,
So I will make a difference, I will carry on in spite,
Shall keep on trying to make sense of this meaningless
Plight. And in the end I'll find you are just another you,
An empty face, a memory, yet for you I cry each night,
And I feel it would seem to me that that is all I ever do.

You are just so small, your voice so strong and smooth,
I feel I could tell you anything, you keep me in a dream,
Your short hair, your pig tails, your face just like the moon.
All I can say is that you're such a gorgeous unique being!
I'd lose myself here and now, take the pill and try to forget,
But everywhere I turn I see your beady starlit eyes,
And it's an addiction, though we've hardly ever spoken yet.

And so I must do what I always do, pretend to be a miracle
Worker, and hope I can at least make a change,
Each hour, each day, each moment that I'm so unsure,
I hope wont be the same, so strange, so some day
This will all be far away,
And I will hear you calling from a distance,
And go into a dream and there I'll stay.

I remember you-so clearly-
Your voice, it was like
Bells ringing endlessly,
For miles. Your like a test,
One with a lot of trials,
But if I keep working on it
I'll find the center of
Your heart, though how
To keep at this for years?
I was on it once I saw you
From the very start.
I'd rather starve
Than forget
You.

It was it's own special season,
Of rainbows, of hearts of light,
Feathers of white gold, arrows,
It was a time of imagination,
Of freckles and of frolicking,
In the midst of fields of poppys,
Here I stood with but one with
Your name on it, in essence
Now I hold on to it for dear life,
Into the dark night I am now
Cloaked, so no one can hear
My cries, calling for you or anyone
From that time, that special time,
Of pine and sage brush, of birthdays,
Of life and of love, our time-of lunch pails,
This time when we all used to laugh
And run in the fields, ours was the sun,
The moon and the grass, ours was the
Flute, the painted face, bon-fires, walking the
Forest path, our time is no longer
That time.

Life is short-it's been 26 years-more like
Eternity.

Success! Progress! The unfinished work of men now dead.
In life each day they lived to be the ones who always led.
Following each day-I swear I wont complain about rain,
The failing now are preached to by those who feel no pain.

They call them "men of power," they worshiped in their might,
Call upon the spirits that do modern science magic every night.
For those of us non-believers, we hold our heads down low,
Not a ***** word, for pity's sake! We're learning to darned slow.

So I am "successful," it plays on in my own mind.
In a while I will be dead, leave this short life behind.
The faithful are now martyrs, they give cash and "daily bread,"
For a common preachy answer from their "son that bled."

But what is success? Can I measure it in meters, in parts?
Can I tell a blind man that he needs faith to walk in the dark?
Or is it only true that we hold our heads up-even fight,
To find a hero that will die for us, instead of keep our sight.

Bo, the dog, I remember petting him,
And the old house, musty but the
Deck was my true haven for my heart,
Beaten up model cars my father
Painted into works of art.

The long driveways gravel, golf clubs,
Magazines, Time, Nat Geo, Hymns,
As well as a clay bowl in her hand,
And in the kitchen, sitting on the
Counter, the ocean filled with sand.

A tree was in the back I'd climb,
The odd-man-out wearing his feathered head
Dress was hidden by the closet door.