The table seated six
and this place housed laughter

Cards and ****** TV and instantaneous wrestling matches
and all of everyone

But that was Before,
now it's After.

The table seats five
and this place houses separation
and coldness and emptiness and knowing
and warnings and fear

fear infects the wounds
when you don't bandage them with hope

Silence and screaming enclosed in the same envelope
addressed to what was here before

Maybe it wasn't sporadic,
but I saw the outbreak coming nonetheless
and this complication isn't remedied painlessly

Until I finally fell and landed perilously where I'm not even wanted
but feel somehow that the pain belongs to me
and I belong to it

Its mine and I'll keep it; oceans could be deeper.
You can't float lifeboats on land

But when the wind becomes black ink,
and I can't lean against the running trees;
I block my face and chase after them

and while I know I think in metaphors and not similes,

I like to think I lie
and I'm only myself,
darkly and simply realistic