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 Sep 2015 Abby Lucy
Chuck
Nobody loves
Her the way I do

Nobody
Loves me

Nobody
To love

Nobody
Loves
Not written in my persona.
My Promise to My Soldier
I promise to be there for you always
Whenever you need a helping hand
I promise to think about you daily
Wherever you are away
I promise to never let you down
No matter what we go through
I promise to keep you in my prayers
So that God may keep you safe
I promise to be here when you return
I will be there waiting
I promise to be your support
When you need it most
I promise to help you through the tough times
Even though it will hurt me
I promise to be here for you when you are in pain
Even though it will pain me too
I promise to support you in any decisions you may make
No matter what they are
I promise to be there for you when decisions need to be made
Even though it will **** me to watch you leave
I promise I will be there to say goodbye
When you leave
I promise to be there to say hello again
When you return home to me
I promise to love you forever and eternally
No matter what happens or where life takes us
I promise to be loyal to you while you are deployed
Because I know that you will be loyal to me
I promise that no matter where life takes me
It will never take me away from you
I promise to be here forever and always
Trustworthy and in love
Forever and always
I promise.
Every life I touch
I break.
I should be used to this
Heartache.
There’s no more ground
Left for me unfound.
I’ve traveled everywhere
And found myself nowhere.
Would you be better off without me?
So you don’t have to see
The pain
That I see?
I’ve opened too many veins,
Left blood red stains
On you.
And I wish I could take everything back
But I’m always too late.
The darkness holds a certain wonder
That I no longer fear
But embrace.
It’s the only time I release
Without hurting you
Because I’m hurting myself.
Don’t let me sleep again
Because in my dreams comes death.
I can’t escape these thoughts.
I want to feel nothing,
So I feel everything.
In my blinding rage
I’m fully awake,
But oblivious.
I want to hold onto you
Forever,
But you’re slipping away through
My mistakes.
Every life I touch
I break.
I should be used to this
Heartache.
There’s no more ground
Left for me unfound.
I’ve traveled everywhere
And found myself nowhere.
 Jan 2014 Abby Lucy
Harold Bracy
A dark dark blue overcomes gazing sight,
As a blue, tinge of black, blanket covering you,
Concealing all that's real, and it defeats all light,
To fend the soap of your skin,
And to blight the harmless lively solar sight.

It comes softly, the night,
A bitter cold to make things sweet,
The blue muddies deeper and deeper black,
It is overtaken by shade,
And makes all things dim in midnight gloom.

The fade comforts you though,
Relieving senses, melting worries, soothing temper,
And challenging thoughts edged in
A deep and mournful life:
A heretic, monster, evil to the world.

But lives, as yours, were
Just ***** grains of sand changed to glass
Neglected, and gone to last.
You'll never know the dark
As it has when it made you then: happy.

So please, take a step,
Make a move and love the darker hue,
Relax as the dark does for you,
Worry for the worried, but not your own,
That is for me and the dark to do.
 Dec 2013 Abby Lucy
Elise
Of You
 Dec 2013 Abby Lucy
Elise
I looked at you and I knew I was not magnificent
but then you turned to face me
and your eyes convinced me otherwise
the way you looked at me so quizzically
attempting to figure out the patterns in my eye movements
and the slight shape my lips take
when I said "hello"
it's beautiful really
the way you set your jaw
when you concentrate

Have I never told you before?

you are so deep
and I don't think I ever want to reach the bottom
I would jump
I would fall
if I could find an edge
if I could only find an edge

of you
 Dec 2013 Abby Lucy
Elise
Clumsy
 Dec 2013 Abby Lucy
Elise
I don't know how to tell you
I have a scar in the shape of a backwards L
from trying to paint words upon my skin
on my left knee
and I don't understand why it is backwards because the
o v e is entirely intact
but mistakes happen
and maybe I was crying too hard to see
clearly
you weren't there to witness it
it was so long ago
I don't even remember the day
I tripped and skinned my knee
I tripped and skinned by heart
and now they both
spell out the same word
(just maybe a little lopsided)
_|ove you
 Nov 2013 Abby Lucy
Misty Kelley
As I think of you I remember how much I hate you.
I'd rather get my arm severed off with an old rusty spoon.
I'd rather be attacked by clowns.
I'd rather eat a spider,
a freaking spider than see you.
But I mean it's all my fault right?
Everything is always MY fault right?
You think because three years have passed everything can be okay again?
Wrong.
No, I'm not overreacting.
Yes, I forgive you.
No, I'm not holding a grudge.
No, I'm not always okay.
No, don't talk to me.
Just no.
I don't want you in my life ever again.
You may seem to have forgotten everything and I try to but it always comes back.
I hope everything you did slowly seeps through your brain and destroys you.
Like you destroyed me.
This hurt you
It hurt me too
All I know is i miss you

You were there for so long
How could you ever leave?
I thought you had another year
Waiting up your sleeve .

The day that you left
Was the saddest of my life
Sitting in my room all alone
Looking at photos of you and I

It might be selfish
But I wish you were here
Even if you stuck around
For one more year

My strength
From you
So i'm just trying to be strong
Just for you

I'm not perfect
No one is
I just hope you're up there
And that you're proud of me

Even though you were holding on for so long
You had to let go
But there's not a day I don't think of you

I just want to tell you
That your always in my heart
Even though I still cry
We are not apart
this poem is about my great grandparents passing away
 Nov 2013 Abby Lucy
Elise
Always
 Nov 2013 Abby Lucy
Elise
It was always a grocery store
or shopping mall
when I imagined the first time I would see you again
we might have happened to turn down the same aisle and turned to see each other
I would have asked you how you were
we would exchange lies about how we were okay
great even, moving on and not looking back
shift slightly to cover up our new scars
and try to smile
I would ask if you were happy
you would say: yes
I would say: good
and after we parted I would decide I am much better off without you by my side

But last night was the first time in 6 months that I had heard your voice
it infiltrated my subconscious
snaked its way around my throat so I couldn't breathe
if you still had my heart it wanted so bad to come back to me I felt it racing in my chest; running for safety
my eyes met your eyes
you smiled, a sad smile
and waved
and I just….waved back
shaking
you knew me too well not to notice
but  still
you left
I fell to the ground
a blur of people and arms around me
and I think I cried
maybe
I should have yelled after you
"I keep all my promises"

&

"I miss you too much to forget"
Note to self: never drive when you are sobbing
I love you, always
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