*******, the way you made me smile.
*******, the way you held me close.
*******, the way you had me falling.
*******, the way you made me love you.

and now, you seem so distant.
and now, you dont even care.
and now, you used me until i was spent.
and now, tears fall among my hair.

When she comes out too early, is she hoping for attention?
She does not get it, nobody ever says "the moonrise is so beautiful this evening"
She is overpowered by her rival everyday. Every evening, every morning.

Sometimes she puts on makeup, an orange hue
An attention getter, these are the only nights we talk about her, create gossip of her rare beauty

There is a side we do not know, she holds mysteries the world may never discover
And her secrets, dark and alluring
Yet she attracts no visitors, the era of investigation dead and gone

Will she ever feel the love that her dear mother receives?

Does she cry when she is gone?

Would we even notice her absence?
She can't even look away from her ignorance, always facing her demising audience
If only people would pay more attention. Someday she may just disappear to gain revenge

And then what?

Here lies the fallen king
The token sober kid
Grew up alone in a full house
Surrounded by friends but always in doubt
That this world so dear held love for him too
The doubt grew too strong
And so, he flew

Those who love will never find it.
Those who love will write odes to crisp fall mornings
And hear symphonies crunched out of the yellow leaves beneath their feet.
Those who love will smile, even though they know
it will give them away
They will offer themselves up as if they had never given the mirror a second glance,
Let themselves be beaten like drums,
And a drum is just a bucket of silence
until you beat something out of it,
Beat something out of it.


Those who love will find poetry in the steam of their coffee
And beauty in even the worst of times;
Leave names like kristallnacht in our history books because they know that broken glass looks like stars,
And when a person truly loves there is nothing, nothing that can stop them from hoping.
People are like buckets of silence
Until you make something out of them,
Make something beautiful.


People who love know that tears
are the same as rain, and they are ready for monsoons
Because loving is lonely,
and for every drop out of shining eye
there are hundreds more waiting in the sky
and the people who love will dance in the downpour,
Collect every drop they can hold where the silence once was because drums can hold tears too,
and they will still be silent until you splash
and make something out of it,
make something beautiful.

The sky is red
The Earth is flat
Life is eternal
I am over you

When I was ten I would go to work with my mom
She worked at a preschool in a not-so-great town
There was one girl who was my favorite
Her name was Trinitaria.

During nap time she asked me to lay with her, so I did
And I remember she said things to me
That I didn't quite understand

A few days ago I took a child abuse prevention course
Because I'm working at a camp this summer
I went home and asked my mom
About Trinitaria, what happened to her

She looked surprised and worried
She told me her adopted father sexually abused her
It was an ongoing case that I was too young to understand

This course I took taught me the signs of abused children trying to open up
And I suddenly realized I could have helped my friend Trinny

But while her innocence was being stolen, mine was busy shielding my eyes and hiding a reality
She couldn't escape from

when I get heart burn I like to imagine it's my body reacting to my mind's mistakes
the heat is a constant reminder that I was the one who created all the sensations
It fuels my soul with the memories of you and how much I let myself go
inflammation takes over and I let it, just like I let you take advantage of me
the pain seeps throughout my chest and I still force my brain to believe that you lied
as the cramping flows deep into the pit of my stomach I'm disgusted
I purge when your name is recited but the only memories leak out
and no anti-acid is strong enough to erase you or what we did