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Apr 2020 · 169
Sad
Lvice Apr 2020
Sad
When does it start to be abuse?
Apr 2020 · 164
Shared Grief
Lvice Apr 2020
One will always experience what the other does in
some strange, guilty way
Jun 2019 · 187
Sick and Tired and Ready
Lvice Jun 2019
I swear to ******* God
I love him so much and yet sometimes
I think I’m ready to leave him
Nov 2018 · 289
Perspective
Lvice Nov 2018
I'm so sick of being
Little
      Tiny
            Accused of not understanding

Told that I will understand as I get older
As I grow

  It makes me want to take the advice you gave me and use it
To make my table even.

Maybe burn it in the fireplace for warmth or laugh at it when I'm down to make myself feel better.

Give it to my dog to chase or shove it in the attic with all the useless things I own

Because I have told you so many times before I will not shut myself off the way you do and become numb to everything I think will drag me under.

I'm going to stand over it with my foot against it's throat and tell it to *******, whether it's my fears or my anxiety or my doubts  I'm going to chase it with a match and burn it alive or put a bag over it's head until it stops telling me what the **** I'm going to do.
Lvice Nov 2018
I would **** the night to get to day as the stars looked the other way

I'd rip the warmth from my stomach and hold the sun by her hair to show her what I've been missing

Can you get addicted to sunshine, if only I knew what I'd gotten myself into

The skies cry every day I pine for the sun to stay

I'm so sick of being so lonely I'd burn up to be next to you
Nov 2018 · 346
New pieces
Lvice Nov 2018
What if the life
Inside of me
Grew to be her own person?

She took my spirit and
Became the fire I kept
Behind the hearth
Of my heart to keep me warm.
Lvice Nov 2018
I guess I
Just care too much
That's my problem
Nov 2018 · 175
Včely
Lvice Nov 2018
She must be mad
     The girl draws bees-
         The hive for days
              And traded her heart for
                        wings

Honeycomb sweet
   Poor girl too light on her feet
     Crazy sad girl
         She's following the bees
Nov 2018 · 186
To my Father
Lvice Nov 2018
Manhood stood
In the shoes of a man
Who loved me when you didn't have the courage to.

When he swallowed glue and patched up the cracks in the dam that held my
Tears back when you let the rivers flow.

Feelings don't drown easy for foreigners, he knows that. Being an immigrant to being a father you should have understood that when you stole the love I had for you and left.

He paid for my sadness and didn't even flinch when I mentioned the taxes on me, all the baggage I had to bring. He paid off the debt you left to me and put the extra carry ons in the closet.

The title belongs to the man who didn't have to ask for it. Who didn't beg me for forgiveness but made up for it by not betraying my loyalty.

King is the man who loves everything he was given and soldier is the man who defends it. Father is the man who was proud enough that when I fell kneeled next to me.

Manhood stood in the shoes of a man who earned the love of someone who doesn't easily give it.
Oct 2018 · 184
Ravaging
Lvice Oct 2018
I want to be hunted
I want to be what gets your heart racing

The thrill of giving yourself
Up to something that you don't want to control.

Tell me why I ache to be eaten alive
To be licked clean and turned inside out, making sure there is nothing left of me but a smile and a heap on the floor.

I want to be ravaged..picked apart by teeth and fingers careful to not miss a thing..
Lvice Oct 2018
Come with me
To the place where
Our hearts can beat
Like wind chimes
And forever
Ring out,
Calling to something greater.
Oct 2018 · 180
10:02 p.m
Lvice Oct 2018
Kiss me like gunpowder
And hold me like a trigger,
you pull regret from
My tongue and smooth defiance
Down my spine.

I wish to be the
Very thing that you crave
To pierce your chest, to be
The strength of will
You need to fight your sleep.

To be the warmth
Of friction after you ask
God for his forgiveness..
To be weapon and woman
Oct 2018 · 161
Arrogant
Lvice Oct 2018
She knows
You are controlling.
You only get
What she allows
you to have.
Oct 2018 · 121
Untitled
Lvice Oct 2018
What if I was the tree
And my arms were the
Branches
And you climbed me
Like a clumsy child
And held on to my leaves
Though they fell like rain?
Oct 2018 · 120
Dirty mouth gypsy
Lvice Oct 2018
***** mouth gypsy

Nails filled with soil

Canvas and bootleg

Without the tortured turmoil

Edgy and real

Though sweet as a cherry

She's every bit as dangerous

And wild and growing weary.

She wonders if there's hope

If she lives on the road

If leaving herself behind

Would allow her to find who she is.
Oct 2018 · 575
"Grow up"
Lvice Oct 2018
She becomes woman
When she puts her foot down
After only using them for
Dancing.

She is woman when she
Doesn't question herself
Or her feelings and isn't scared
To talk back for once.

She is grown when she can
Still giggle and be playful and dance and have wonder
And still put you in your place
Oct 2018 · 127
Untitled
Lvice Oct 2018
I need to laugh
and feel
My shoulders rise
from how they've
been held down
Oct 2018 · 220
Untitled
Lvice Oct 2018
It feels
Like a weight
That sits on your
Chest and slowly
Weighs you down until
You feel like you're used to
The weight. Then when you're
Ready to go on, you step into the
Water and it brings you deeper into yourself.
Oct 2018 · 256
I miss you
Lvice Oct 2018
How do you hold
Yourself together
When the distance
Is growing,
When the quilt is being ripped
To cotton and thread
And your tears spill as you have begged them not to.

How do you pick yourself up
When the anger you feel
Threatens to unseam you and
Everything you love falls to
The floor and shatters like
The last glass plate in the cabinet?

Please tell me how you stay true
To yourself while becoming a woman, and wanting to be unselfish while still staying loyal to the promise you made to always say how you truly felt.

I need answers on how to grow and still grow together
Oct 2018 · 167
Daylight Thoughts
Lvice Oct 2018
I'd like to live
Between the blades
Of grass

To collect the dew
On my legs
In the mornings

For spiders to use me
To steady their webs with
Nimble limbs.

For young girls
to play with as they
Sit cross legged in their yard

To grow and be taken
For granted and to become
Aerial when she does cartwheels and gets me in her hair

To be green and sit under
The sun and withstand the rain
Oct 2018 · 343
Doesn't it?
Lvice Oct 2018
Doesn't my mind and soul
Deserve all the attention
That you give to my
Body?
Oct 2018 · 171
To Seek and Find
Lvice Oct 2018
Lately I have been
Feeling my fire dwindle,
Making life all the more beautiful to me.

Like I have been anticipating this, waiting on the edge of my seat in gold for my chest
To no longer rise.

Just today the sun bathed me in such a light I'd never seen, it had made me smile in a way I'd never have before and before I turned away, I told my friends goodbye and held my hands out to them.

I'd been seeking for some kind of peace and feeling this warmth take me over made me realize that there is something waiting for me

Just as I am waiting for it.
Oct 2018 · 262
9:36 p.m
Lvice Oct 2018
Punish him
By being better,
Show him
He is wrong
By being good
To him.
This is
How you
Do not lose
Yourself.
Lvice Oct 2018
You and I
We will live in
This place,
The space between
Heaven and Earth.
Where I've only
Met you God's handful
Of times
And everyone
Would probably
Speak in Shakespearean
Ryhmes, and love would
Pave the sky.
Oct 2018 · 206
Adam and Eve
Lvice Oct 2018
I have loved you
Since Adam gave
His rib to Eve

Since you have shared
Part of your very being
To be with me.
Oct 2018 · 202
Viva
Lvice Oct 2018
I have lived
In such a way
The trees tremble
When I water
Them with grace.

I have loved
with such passion
That those who
Have not shudder
When met with my gaze.
Sep 2018 · 271
Prayers
Lvice Sep 2018
Pray for happiness
Pray that you don't lose the thing that fills you
Or lose the person who completes you in a way most people could never understand.
Pray that you stay in the person's life that you love. That you hold on to everything, that you never starve yourself of human affection and beg to be loved and understood again.
Lvice Sep 2018
I wish I could
Be indifferent to you,

But my anger rises like smoke
And you are the center of what

Always drove me to the brink
Of leaving my home.
To leave the thing that has loved you
Sep 2018 · 231
In some pavilion,
Lvice Sep 2018
Two young woman are
Sitting across from each other
Soaking in the sun and scattering drops of rain.

Two sisters get to know each other again after what feels like years, over silly things like tattoos and muffins and how he held her close to him like he couldn't get enough.

The younger of the two wants to say how much she loves him. She wants to say so badly that he makes her pupils dilate too and he smiles like the sun and she doesn't want to lose that warmth.

As best friends they should be able to tell each other everything...but they've been apart for sometime and the age difference is a rift between them on occasion.

I just want to say that the love you feel, that mom feels, it's running through me too.
Sep 2018 · 381
11:39 a.m
Lvice Sep 2018
Y o u   g e t  u n d e r  m y  s k i n ,

P r o v o k e  m e.
Sep 2018 · 217
"Bare with me"
Lvice Sep 2018
I could never forgive myself
If I hurt you
Sep 2018 · 152
That's all again
Lvice Sep 2018
I feel so empty
Sep 2018 · 169
The Sun's Children
Lvice Sep 2018
I whisper my prayers
To the Sun's children
Of love and kindness
And tell them about the strength
That he gives to me.

They have all grown
In peace and every day
They blossom towards
The warmth of my words to
Him.
Sep 2018 · 147
Tears me to pieces
Lvice Sep 2018
How
Do
you
Carry
So
much
Weight.
How
do
I
Take
Away
Some
Of
The
Guilt?
Where
Do
You
Store
It?
How
Can
I
Help.
Sep 2018 · 424
Sometime in January
Lvice Sep 2018
I now understand
That it all came down
To a single decision-

This is the
Moment I grew into
Myself.
Sep 2018 · 733
5:46 p.m
Lvice Sep 2018
If I had to love
You twice
I'd first come
To know your doubts
And then your dreams.

By my hand would they disappear and then
Your hopes would
Grow in the sun as
They may.
Sep 2018 · 204
2:54
Lvice Sep 2018
The rain is pouring,
And even after all the pain
We have endured
We have not yet become invincible.
Lvice Sep 2018
The most intimate
Thing I have ever felt was
The sharing of prayers.

The happiness and well being
Of each other  a common
Wish between us.

I've never felt
So close to you my
Dear one.
Sep 2018 · 198
9:53 p.m
Lvice Sep 2018
My love for you
Is felt through
My trembling
Sep 2018 · 298
"Wealth of Sundays"
Lvice Sep 2018
To name
                                                                    
                                                                               something, takes away
                                                          

its power or makes it
                                                                                              
  


    more
                                                                                                    

                                              



                                            pronounced.
Sep 2018 · 357
Thanatophobia
Lvice Sep 2018
There was no fear
of death in life,

but the subconscious
understands fear,

and I was afraid
to slip away in  my sleep.
Sep 2018 · 198
Sincerity Part II
Lvice Sep 2018
You have
Hurt me in ways
Deeper than my real
Father could

You said the words
But they were heavy
And empty
Aug 2018 · 199
The Lines I couldn't follow
Lvice Aug 2018
I couldn't tell you why I'm
holding the globe like
a crystal ball, it
could never tell me where you are,
and I'm not that type of gypsy.
Lvice Aug 2018
You came too late in life,
when I no longer needed
to be tucked in or treated
like a princess.

You came after I had
already saved myself;
where I captured the
Dragon and made him mine.

I no longer needed to be
told I was special, or beautiful.
I became the King, loved myself,
made the voyage, slayed the Dragon.

You came after I realized there
was no pieces missing,
you came after I had fully
respected myself.

I don't need you anymore,
I did it myself.
Aug 2018 · 210
Barely bareable
Lvice Aug 2018
My body is
Finally getting me
Back for all the things
I have ever put it through
Aug 2018 · 165
No vines, no sun, no breeze
Lvice Aug 2018
I resent
The window for
Being more open then me
Aug 2018 · 203
7:03 a.m
Lvice Aug 2018
I only see
The good in people
Because what else could
There be to see?
Aug 2018 · 241
Ella Sol
Lvice Aug 2018
Her heart
Beats inside my
Stomach
Aug 2018 · 244
Innovation
Lvice Aug 2018
I'd run away
From all of you
To find myself
And live my truth

There wouldn't be
A problem left if only
She understood he
Wasn't the secret kept.

I left your anger
Tears and pettiness
Under my pillows to be
Collected by whatever God

Is there waiting for them.  
I will not be the one
Your insecurities and fears
Haunt. I cannot let You

Determine my future
When what was good for you
Cannot be my medicine. I smile
With all the brightness of

A million suns and I can't
Take your constant clouding
Of my judgement. If you don't
Know I love so differently then

You do then you haven't been listening to me.  I have been screaming so loudly for so long
My throat is raw with emotion.

I want to bathe until all of the things we have been through are boiled off. I want a skin only the sun and breeze have touched.
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