This land means less and less
to me,
without you breathing through
it's trees.

I wonder
if  
you wonder
about
me  
too

I ache for love I can never have
and for hands I have never held

You don't love your body
but your body loves you
after all this time
it looks after to you.
it fights and wages war against
the conflicts of your mind
telling you to die.
you're still living
heart, still beating
still breathing
always fighting.
you say to yourself
"I don't want to go on"
"I can't go on any further"
but your body says no.
your heart is still beating
and your body is still working
underneath all this
is not someone who has given up
you still have a fight within you
your body hasn't given up
and neither should you.

I hate these thoughts
that stick in my head
that come out at night
why I try go to bed
*******.
I want to sleep.

I met you there with a nervous smile
and left knowing you'd be here awhile.
You were different to anyone I've ever known,
used to have a tendency to drink alone
but something about you,changed me somehow.
You gave me your best and I gave you my worst
Why let me in to just get hurt?

But moments stay,
when people leave
and I still remember

Late nights and buses
Running and laughing
'Till I would starting crying,
you were so drunk out your mind

But moments stay,
when people leave
and I still remember

Dancing in the kitchen in the refrigerator light
and sitting on the roof late at night
seeing all the world from above

Kissing and fighting
Running and laughing
I loved last December
Don't think I don't remember

Moments stay,
when people leave
and I still remember,
that night in December.

My eyes are lagoons
All you can see is ripples
though storms rage inside.