sister of mine
listen
hear me if you can
i won't let you slip away
you're mine
i love you
don't leave
i won't say i understand your pain
but sister of mine
don't leave
i beg of you don't leave
i can only imagine you in that bed
that's seen so much pain
that's felt so much gore
i can only imagine
the pain behind your eyes
the loneliness in your heart
sister of mine
i am here for you
i will always be here for you
through pain
or laughter
just please
don't leave
i beg of you don't leave
you're my sister
and i can't see you leave

so gentle your smile is
so shy as well
i don't know what you're hiding from
but i think it is cute

so warm your smile is
so timid as well
i want you to face the music
but take your time

so beautiful your smile is
so free as well
i want you to always smile
but also be happy

so wonderful your smile is
so day-making as well
i want you to be mine
but it's your decision in the end

the inflicted hallmark love is in the air
roses
chocolates
teddy bears
stuff you can buy all year
now made important
i love this foolish holiday though
with its cute glances
and little nik-nak gifts
its cute
the inflicted hallmark love is in the air
for its valentines

inner thoughts
clouding what needs to be done
outer influences
preventing me from going anywhere
your just perfect
never change
inner thoughts
containing my wants
outer influences
tightening my leash
your just perfect
never change
inner thoughts
never ending
outer influences
dragging me away
your just perfect
never change

heart racing
when that bell rings
body ready
when the crowd moves
mind jumbled
when those people get in the way
fingers fumbling
when i see your hair
temples sweating
when i see your eyes
voice silent
when first in contact
act totally normal
when the impulse is gone
disappointment in myself
when we're talking
sadness in my eyes
when we're done
anger at myself
when that moment is gone
eyes twitching
when the bell strikes again

we loved each other
and we were proud of that
we didn't say it much
because we just knew
it was a fact as much as the fact that humans can't breathe under water
we loved each other
and nothing could stop that
we were always there for one another
because there was no place better to be
it was if we were at disney world at the age of 5, begging our parents for us to stay
we loved each other
and you took yourself away
we weren't together anymore
because you completely left
it was even written down that you would forever be gone
we loved each other

the clock ticking
our hearts beating
the pens tapping
our brains dreaming
the feet stomping
our hands joining
the bell ringing
our hearts pounding
the lips kissing
our faces flushing
the feeling impulsing
our love increasing
the bell ringing
our lips separating
the clock ticking

troubles all around
clumping about
never leaving
people suffering
from their troubles
but time will give them freedom
distance
clarity

troubles all around
terrorizing
the not so innocent people
suffering
from their mistakes
but time will let them go
let them learn
and be free

troubles all around
for everyone
we all get by
with the time given to us
to enjoy the freedom
the relinquishment
of troubles

I planted a flower for you
you took care of it
watered it
nourished it
talked to it

I planted a flower for you
but then you got mad
and you stomped on it
drowned it
didn't love it

The flower kept growing
while the neglect was doing the same
but it fought
and would keep fighting
till it was completely grown

you forgot about that flower
so i took care of it
nourished it
watered it

you came back one day
and saw the magnificent flower
bloomed to its fullest
and stronger then ever

the flower didn't need you
and so don't I

I hate the games we play
as if im cat
and you're holding onto string

you keep pulling away
but luring me near

playing my hopes
and thinking its all for fun

i will get that string one day
and hold it till the end of time

i love that string
and will one day make it mine.

i don't enjoy the games
but i can't help but still play

when that smile rises
and that laugh cackles
all i can do is love

love the way you tell jokes
or share a sad story

love the way you may laugh
or even shed a tear

love the way you talk
or while we sit in total silence

when i hear that laugh
and see that smile
all i can do is love

so close to the winning
so close
there will be no prize
no crowd
no ribbon
just a goal to be diminished;
the best kind of prize to be won

I saw you from afar
in a crowded place
with little silence

I wanted to know your name
your name was called
from what i think was your friend

I called for you
but no answer in return
I called again

You looked beautiful that night
and i know i sound crazy
but i wanted to know you

We never said hello that night
for the place was crowded
and the silence was too expensive

I think about you
now and then
and know i'll see you again

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I love poetry
just not as much as you

I love your lips
so smooth
and fragile

even when we talk
i can't help but to look
at those beautiful lips

I would kiss those lips
till i could no more
for those lips are amazing

I would caress those lips
till you were tickled
by the way i love you

for its not only the lips
that i truly love
since those lips have to belong
to someone that deserves them

Where do i look
to find you
i don't even know your face
your laugh
your jokes

Where do i look
to find you
i don't even know your name
your past
your possible future

Where do i look
when i know your near
but too far to see

Where do i look
when i want you
but don't know who you are

Where do i look
to find the one

i see nothing
coming to mind
coming to the tips of my fingers
that are oh so tired

i feel nothing
coming to me
seeking my hand
letting me fly

i hear nothing
coming to find me
looking for me
bringing me home

i smell nothing
coming from the one
who i was looking for
who let me go too far

from afar
many people may see
the beauty
the grace
the feeling you've left for me
but i see
what is true
what you've hidden
and now what i need to say
is that we're through
i thought this was more
then just a game
i thought it was care
and not a gift of shame
i held you high
while you were digging low
to the pit of my heart
just to let go
im done with the lies
that you speak so well
im done with the face
that locked me in this cell

spiraling
spinning
out of control
everything mute
everything blinded
colors swarming
like bees to their hives
head pounding
to the beat of an unheard drum
the colors turn black
the mutes turn loud
the blinded turn sightly
spiraling
spinning
out of control
head slowing down
body slowing down
only the color black
and no more sound

we are strong
we are together
we are weak
we are apart
we learn
from each other
our wisdom
our lessons
our memories
shared for teaching
we are together
we are strong

play the part
the part of your character
the character
which the puppet master has created

we all dance
and laugh
simply putting on a show
for the evil puppet master

he watches with a giggle
creating new ideas
to entertain
his sick puppet master mind

as we laugh
and cry
to the demand
of our puppet master

we enjoy when he's happy
and suffer
when he is down
for he is the puppet master

we cannot fight back
for he calls the shots
and if he senses a rebel
scissors will be in the hand of our puppet master

don't irritate him
he has a temper
and a sick sense of humor
for he is our puppet master

I want to take it away
wipe away the sad
and make your day
I hate to see that face
with great disappointment
and disgrace
You're so pretty
but so much pain
and too little pity
I don't want to see the pain
that lives in those eyes
that cause so much strain
You are loved by many
and missed by little
don't go away my Jenny

i see the child in your eyes
crying
waiting
for the next disguise
you feel as if you have to hide
from the ones who hurt you
or the ones who have yet to die
the hatred seeping down each tear
growing
and progressing
by the year
the child who is waiting
won't wait much longer
too much to fight for
and only so much degrading
the end will come
where you can be set free
to find your peace
just wait for the next beat of the drum

stumped
nowhere to go
nowhere to turn
stumped
un-relaxed chains tightening
un-relaxed brain imploding
stumped
no place to understand
no place to be free
stumped
nothing coming
nothing gone
stumped
understand
that i am stumped

sun drops tickle the backs of children's necks
as the adults are cold with bitterness

winds flow through the children's hair
as the adults worry about tangles

clouds pass the smiling children
as it wants to rain on the adults

trees shade the sweaty children
as it keeps the adults cold in their bitterness

the grass plays along with the children
as it grabs and wants more from the adults

the children and adults share one thing:
oblivion of this magic secret message nature is trying to send

enjoy being young and old
have fun

A place to be
to see
to feel
feel comfortable

A feeling of warmth
of solitude
of peace
peaceful sleep

A sleep like no other
uninterrupted
unified
un-alone

Alone
is what i’ll never be
when im in that place with you

denying
what a beautiful distraction
a nice escape
a magical far away place
depression
what a dark place to be
a moody cloud
a unlikable state of mind
anger
what fury may come
a red hot steam
a uncooling rage
acceptance
what a sigh of relief
a loving way to be
a wonderful end

if you want to ask
simply ask
if you have a comment
don't hold back
if you need anything
inform me about what that is
i don't play games
i want you to be happy
just tell me
and i'll do what i can

that one time
where we hugged
where we kissed
where we were
that one time
where you laughed
where you sighed
where you smiled
that one time
where i was with you
where i was holding you
where i was yours
that one time
we were happy

looking into the sky
for answers
is not the way to go
looking deep into the earth
for pity
is not the way to go
looking ahead
and down the road
will show you the way
to what you hope for
dream for
and
what you'll work for

no pity
no thought of mind that no one understands
no dwelling on whats happened
moving on
new year
no more of the old stories

as much as i wish all this can be done
it wont
there will be dwelling
and only slight moving on
people may understand but that doesn't matter

we all know whats good for us
but we dont want to listen to ourselves
so for once
listen

with a flash so bold
and a color so bright
i cant believe i missed you
you were there
in reach of my arm
but invisible
is what you were to me
i wanted to see
i guess you were hiding
you bright star
i cant believe i missed you

the temptation
of that evil green light
so small
but there
begging for me to click on it
to tap across the board
to you
but i dont want to bother
i dont want to intrude
but the temptation
of that evil green light
so small
but there

intense
means nothing now
as if the word doesn't even exist
intense
there is too much
too much to the extent that
it lost its meaning
intense
people
feelings
natural disasters
intense
it was used too often
now it means nothing

the morning dew
taking away the night terrors
the afternoon blaze
taking away the morning grog
the evening muse
taking away the afternoon stress
the nighttime terrors
taking away the days sanity

a minute
feeling like an hour
changes your life forever
for that moment
an hour
feeling like a minute
changes your mood for only seconds
good to bad
bad always lasts

boiling
boiling
like no other feeling
a volcano erupting
in the very pit of sanity
boiling
boiling
no cooling system around
just piles
and piles
of worn out ****
boiling
boiling
the eruption
like a tantrum
wipes out all who is around
no where for them to go
just let the ashes envelope them
and **** them
boiling boiling
the erupting volcano
never rests

i feel like a child
a spoiled child
who wants what they cant have
its childish
and naive
but its how i feel
your like a piece of candy
like caramel
or taffy
i want the caramel
but no one will give it to me
so i have my fit
and hopefully grow up
im like a child
and your the dreamy piece of candy

i can see
but cannot touch
as if i were in a museum
and you
yes you
would be behind the bullet proof glass
safely placed
for display only
so beautiful
yet fragile
so passionate
yet weak
i want to break the glass
to be with you
to talk with you
to hold you
but again
its as if im in a museum
and your behind the bullet proof glass
i can look
but cannot touch

out in the field
with the dreams swarming
and the eyes closing
the girl falls asleep
with the dreams of a child
the women wakes up
and the eyes so mature
she lives
a life of dreams
with a laugh so strong
and a heart so warm
this way of life
is my dream

i see you lying there
with a smile of lust
and a touch of warmth
i see you *******
with shoulders of silk
and legs of ease
i see you pulling me near
with wants of more
and eyes of trust
i see you kissing me
with lips of roses
and cheeks that have been flushed
i see you there
in my dreams
in my memories

i watch
and wait
wanting you in my arms
i sit
and tap
on the bed which we share
i sigh
and forget
the memories from so long ago

our story was erased
by the way you left
and how you stayed
our story will not be told
by who we were
and who i am
our story will live
by the emotions
and the facts
our story
will only be known
by me

im born
to die
i live
to love
i suffer
to enjoy
i listen
to ignore
im here
to be with you

you twist
and turn
the words
the meanings
the memories
you throw in my face
what once was
but now what is
you walk away
with no care
that you have hurt again
you have such hate
towards nothing
you shared a lot
but took it all away
you know what you've done
so why would you apologize
and apologize
and again
******* apologize
im done with what you've done
im done with your fake tears
we will never talk again
you know why

please no games
no lies
no fakes
please just be you
funny
and smart
please tell me
when something is wrong
when something is right
please dont protect me
from you
or what you you think you are
please oh please
be mine

so scary
the wait
so breathe taking
the wait
so yearning
the wait
so unsure
the wait
so tiring
the wait

the numbness has melted
the mask still broken
the feelings
stronger then ever
the maturity
showing itself
the lessons
have been learned
and will be retained
the hurt
will always remain
but will not control
the joy
will be nourished
and appreciated
the trying
will continue
the tears
will fall
but in the end
it will all be worth it

swiftly
the air moves
the trees tussle
the grass sways
roughly
the cars zoom
the kids cry
the alarms call
paused
the way we talk
the way we stare
the way we are

if only i hadn't stood so close
it wouldn't hurt as much
if only i knew what would happen
it wouldn't be a surprise
if only you had told me
it wouldn't have gone through
if only you had stopped
it wouldn't be so bad
if only you knew
it would hurt me so much