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XIII Nov 2017
It's so easy
to judge what you see,
to mock other's decisions,
when you don't actually know what's going on,
when you don't feel the same emotions,
when you're not in that exact same situation.

But, oh well,
it is human's expertise
to always throw judgment.
You're not wearing the same shoes as we are.
XIII Nov 2017
I can bear all the mockery
I can bear all the insults
Throw them at me, feel free
After all, it is my fault

But what I can't bear is
When they badmouth you
When they treat you like an evil *****
Because I'm the only one who knows it isn't true

They didn't know how much you've suffered
From the hatred I cursed on you
They didn't know how much you've endured
As you let your guilt devour you

They weren't able to see you smile
Even though everything's not fine
They weren't able to see you trying your best
To go through life even though it's the hardest

They weren't able to see you struggle
As you try to become the villain to do what's right
As you swallowed the pain of hurting your lover
When all you ever wanted was to hold him tight

It's all too much for me
Especially when I pushed you to do all these things
When it was me who planted that seed that became everyone's tree
When I was the one to blame for all your pain

And yet despite all these
I chose to become selfish
If I can turn back time
I'd still do the same and make you mine

And yet despite all these
You too chose to become selfish
Because even though for a short time
You didn't want to see me cry

And so with the chance I have
I'll show you again my unchanging love
I'll stand by your side
I'll become your ally

They won't ever understand
And that I won't mind
Even though you'll let go of my hand
I'll fight, and I'm proud
XIII Nov 2017
You’re the reason of my existence, the one first love that makes me alive
The love that even so many years couldn’t erase
Come back and find the place that’s yours
By my side

You’re my own breath, my open wound
You know I still remain even in your heart, right?
Do not turn away from your own truth
Come to me

From the moment I saw you, everything was transformed
Just whispering your name and my world shakes
Our bond is beyond time, we’re destined to be together
Come back to me once again
Dance with me towards dawn

You’re the only one for me
The only light of my vain existence
Only you makes me complete, my love

From the moment I saw you, even breathing… I can’t even breathe
Just whispering your name and my world shakes

Our bond is beyond time, we’re destined to be together
Now come back to me
Let’s dance together towards dawn
© Loving You Keeps Me Alive by Kim Junsu & Jung Sunah lyrics translation
Dracula The Musical OST
XIII Nov 2017
I have listened to it,
I have felt it,
I have written about it,
all, before you did.
So don't fret
my old friend,
the atonement
for my sins
will soon be here
in just a blink,
just as you wish,
so just wait.
XIII Nov 2017
If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have cried over your farewell message
I wouldn't have thought of regret
I wouldn't have thought of the days without you as a waste

If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have thought of giving you forgiveness
Or seeing you again face to face
Nor talking to you casually as if nothing happened

If I loved you a little less
It wouldn't have been painful seeing you talk to him
I wouldn't have smiled as if I felt nothing
I wouldn't have felt glee when you turn your phone's mode to airplane

If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have felt anxious as the end gets nearer
I wouldn't have felt the urge to hug you closer
I wouldn't have asked that little favor

If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have stared at your lips
And asked for that one final kiss
I wouldn't have felt my love was being reciprocated

If I loved you a little less
That night wouldn't be flashing back repeatedly
I would've slept well entirely
I wouldn't have wished you with me

If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have chose you over her
Her, with the love, future and security that she offers
I wouldn't have the guts to hurt other people

If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have stomached being a third party
I wouldn't have accepted you after what you've done to me
I would have cared what others think about me

If I loved you a little less
I wouldn't have agreed to this kind of setup
Like on a death row queue, I voluntarily line up
Except that this is a slow torturous death with a heads up

If I loved you a little less
I would've forced you my beliefs
I would've blackmailed you emotionally
And tied you up just to be with me

If only I have loved you a little less
Just a little less
But I only love you a little,
More and more each day

If only I have loved you a little less
But my love for you was beyond everything
Beyond time, pain, risks, judgment and common sense
Even beyond death, I think

If only I have loved myself a little less
I wouldn't have decided to fight a handicapped game
I wouldn't have swallowed all the hatred and curses thrown at my name
I wouldn't have been able to love you all the same

Curse my stubborn heart for not knowing how to love a little less
It only knows of love that is always at its peak
With only one choice between all or nothing
And it always chooses all, if it's you, right from the very beginning
XIII Nov 2017
A mortal and a maiden
Loved each other
So much that they didn't thought back then
That they'll end

A god betrothed the maiden
Leaving the mortal broken
But after loving himself
He should fight, he realizes

But the only way to fight a god
Is for the mortal to become a Beelzebub
And because he knows their love is mutual
He became the devil; sacrificing it all

The mortal waged war with god
Fights with the maiden on his mind
Fights with all his might
Fights a losing fight

And as the god's final blow struck
As the mortal's body drops
His evilness slowly leaves out
Along with his life

The maiden runs up to him
As they heard the god laughing
"It wasn't a fight that he could've won.
But yours, the maiden's decision."

The mortal heard the maiden weeping
Reached for her hand, with all his strength left
"Even if it was just for the love exhaled from your exhausted breath,
fighting a losing fight was worth it."
XIII Nov 2017
I am that germ
that holds on to that .1%
chance of surviving.
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