A day of celebration
When one walks across the stage
and grabs a piece of paper

However, when faced with the same situation
I realize I am not the woman people expect
instead, I am a scared little girl
living in fear
and hiding in my room

Once again
counting days till I move
while living a hell
and putting on a pretty face, so no one speculates

Once more, I sit
numb to lifes situations
scarred of the unknown
and hiding to prevent fights

Once more
I graduate from hell

To draw a day
A single image
Perfect
Happy
all caught in a photo

A unrealistic image

There is no sunshine and rainbows
They is no perfect green grass
Gloomy clouds fill the blue sky
and demons crowd the image

But to draw once a day
may just keep the demons at bay.....

It's coming to a new year
a new year with you

We have a few hours left
but I can see you're already ready for bed

When time comes
I know it will a long night

I fear how you will handle the sounds
but I know you will be alright

A new year
A new home

A perfect home
A forever home

Though we rarely talk
I feel you near

I understand the gifts I sent
are probably the few that spark imagination
and bring back the tiny Christmas spirit

However, I look at my tree
thousands of miles from yours
and I know there is nothing from you

no present or gift with your name
nothing to show you were here

But I am not sad
because even though I do not know where I stand with you
I know where you stand with me

and even there is no present from you
I smile and look to the sky
Wishing for you to be here

Longing for you to be near
and ultimately
just missing you here with me

Looked over
Ignored
Pushed aside

I work with what I have
but yet others get special treatment
and I'm once again told I can't do something

When I speak questions
I am yelled at
and cut with a knife
called "Insincere"
and family grows smaller

Messages of love and hope
are overlooked
in the chaos of the job

everyone forgets me
so who would care
if I just disappeared?