Caleb John: Poems

Nov 2017 · 422

Caleb John Nov 2017

There's a flame in this world thats been used to take down the men of this world. Its a flame that leaves a burn and then we wonder why did i turn. That flame is an instinct that looks so good the feel of its warm light but its easy to forget its bitter bite. Its a tattoo and it only takes one night to leave its burns on you. So many boys chase it because its an addiction. These boys never grew up to become men. They chased after that girl and afterwards they feel the need to hurl because after that night l they realize they feel different. They lost a part of themselves and took a part of her to. Dont chase after that flame it will leave you scorched in pain. You wouldnt believe the burns from that flame. Luckily i never felt the full force of that heat but ive seen the scars and regrets of those who are ready to place another bet. I look around and see Godless boys curled around that flame not aware of the scorch not aware of the pain but im no better then them. I try to warn them but they only scoff and mock telling me i dont know the pleasure. But its not pleasure its pressure with so many pains i cant even imagine. Dont chase that flame it will turn a Godly man into a Godless boy.

Nov 2017 · 103

The Boys of this World

Caleb John Nov 2017

The Boys of this World

So many boys are born into this world but how many of them become men? I look around at my peers and i decided i did not want to be like them. Chasing after money, drugs, women, alcohol. This is just the headline so let me read to you the punch line because when you read this it's gonna make your head spin. I look around at the boys around me who chase pleasure and temporary joy dont know the game theyre playing. When you go for that girl after a night of lust you wake up and i felt that i must. You feel uneasy because all of a sudden they realize something feels wrong. Then what happens a month later when that same girl rocks your world with two words, i'm pregnant is all that she says. Then you start to panic all the anxiety you felt since that night collapses on top of you and you lose your breath and start looking for the button that says redo but it wouldnt matter because now your an addict because you gave into the lie and fell into the whole thats so black you cant see your hand in front of youre face. Hows that for a fast pace. You see you begin to realize your life is all messed up your to young to be a father you werent ready for this world. Then you leave the girl with a broken and shattered heart and a child she was never meant to raise alone. With you its just on to the next girl you can pressure to use her for your pleasure. You think its about love but thats never what it was. It was never about love it was only about ***. You see one gorls not enough because now youre an addict. *** is your God and you have to have it. You begin to think youre alone in this world and that your to ***** to come to the only thing in the universe that can help you. Jesus was standing there with his hand reached out and you slapped it away. Instead you kept falling and he chased you down the mountain you were falling down and one day that mountain you were falling down falls on top of you and youre not strong enough to carry that mountain but Jesus is standing there with you till the end and that day you finally realize that mountain is gonna crush you you give that mountain to him and he gives you a mountain of grace and love that is the lightest thing you ever felt. The false gods of this world will take a boy and keep him a boy he will never grow into a man. So dont chase those gods only one God can save you from those gods and his name is Jesus Christ.

Nov 2017 · 972

Dog Tags

Caleb John Nov 2017

Dog Tags

No one said life was gonna be like this.
Chasing these demons, throwing my fists.
No one said this cross was gonna be heavier than the stone rolled away from that empty tomb.
At nights I struggle with these temptations in my mind but I refuse to give and refuse to bend.
During the days I look into the eyes of that kid who I wish he would let himself be saved. But he refuses to cave. I look into those but I dont see his. I see the devils eyes and he tells me how much he hates me and anyone like me but that punk wont phase me. He uses my peers to try to haunt me but I kept walking while they kept taunting. He tries to break me with this temptations and he tries to destroy me with anxiety and depression but I refuse to listen. The devil just wont get it, he tries to throw me outta commision but I wont be pushed off mission.
He tries to make useless but I look down at those dog tags around my neck and im reminded just why im fighting because my master cant be beaten and neither can his warriors.
Im fighting for him and im fighting for the salvation of those who deny him.
My heart breaks for those lost souls.
This nation struggles with depression yet they keep chasing the very things causing their depression.
This nation follows the American dream but really its just an illusion full of confusion. I wander through that fog clinging to my dog tags that lead the way towards true happiness. Not this sadness.
I tasted the things of this world and I want no part in them.
The devil thought he had me but then love broke through and carried me, beaten and battered to victory.
Yet the war's not over, every day it's a battle for my life its a fight for whats right.
But there is a promise of victory.
I came into this war thirsty for water, im not hungry for sand.
The devil thought he could take me I remembered grace and the first time I tasted it so he can charge me with everything hes got. My general knows his filthy plot. Im in this till the finish so ill tell the devil to shut it whenever he tries to remind me. He tries to rip that cross from my neck and deny me who I am but I know who I am. Im a child of the king almighty

Nov 2017 · 86

Suicide

Caleb John Nov 2017

Suicide

Some days I struggle with my heart because it constantly wants to part. Some days i wrestle with my pride and my temptations. I wish these demons inside me would take physical form because i would cut their heads off. I would rather fight forever in the physical realm then in my heart. These demons tear me apart. Some days i would feel like dying. Some days i would be too choked up because of the pain that i kept up. Some days i picked up that knife and thought about ending it all. Some days i never wanted to wake up. Struggling with the anxiety and depression. Afraid of what i would become. Tired of living but i knew taking my life would be sinning and i knew deep down i was created for something more but right now i feel so poor. I was created for more than just the average joe, flipping burgers and selling fries. Maybe that's why i struggle so much is because i know right from wrong and it was never easy doing what's right if it was we wouldn't have any problems in this world. I can't say i always did what was right because i know that sometimes the wrong can feel so right but it's not right. It's a fight. The depression and anxiety try to eat me alive because sometimes i wonder if i'm able to do what i was called to do. The truth is i'm not. On my own i will get owned. Whenever i tried to do something on my own strength it blew up in my face but whenever God put my hand to something i was unstoppable. So i'm gonna do my best to flow to the rhythm of his drum but sometimes i lose the flow and all i feel is cold. When i think about the life i was called to live i sit back and think how can i do this. In reality i walk among men as a giant but on the inside i feel like a coward trying to hide from his duty because of fear of losing. I was called to stand for those who can't. I was called to speak for the voiceless. I was sent to advise the crushed and the wounded. I can't do this on my own, maybe that's why the thought of self destruction enters my mind but it will never happen because that will mean the devil won and i let my savior down. I don't like to lose so i'm gonna finish this fight till someone puts this body into the ground but that won't happen until God allows it. That's ok because my life will never be about me because it never was about me i'm here to glorify my God but everyday i fail him. To Isis and other haters of the followers of Christ. You won't win this war. No matter how many bullets you fire into our skulls, no matter how many heads you take, no matter how many graves you dig. You will never win because greater is he living in us than he who is in the world. He is mightier than you could ever imagine so i hope you will repent of your wicked ways and join us because Jesus didn't die on that cross for just me but for you too. Jesus is victorious.

— The End —