Wannabe Love Poem
By a poet who's never been in love
Never found the one
To hold under the night sky
And smile while the world is ending
Because they're in their loved ones arms

Wannabe Love Poem
By a poet who's never loved
Who's never been kissed
or told
"I love you"

Scream and hit the Children
And watch their hopes and dreams burn
What will be of our Children?
What will be of our future?

Love warrior
Here we are
Drawn together
Like a beggar falling

A wonder seeker
Under the moons godly gaze
For the last time

He was a sculptor
She was his inspiration
Never a Human
Always his muse

So when she died
He tried to resurrect his muse
With clay

He couldn't sculpt her face
He couldn't remember
He had lost his muse

The sky was weeping
And so am I
The leaves were falling apart
And so am I

The sunset was gone
And so were You
The flowers were rotting
And so were you

And I told you about my darkest secrets
Things I had never told anyone
I told you about my sorrow and darkness
That's in my heart

And yet
You still look at me as if I was the Sun

They said she was as delicate as glass
When in reality she was as delicate as a bomb

I lost you
But found myself

Your flowers died last Monday
But I couldn't bear to throw them out
Sad and Looking down
Just like me
Wilted, Rotting and Brown
Just like you

So I looked at you with confusion
The theater curtains were down
The lights were off
No one is in the audience
Empty Seats
So why do you keep acting?

"He's so honest!"
Everyone exclaimed with joy
And while honesty is a good thing at times
Sometimes You wanted to be lied to
To be comforted
And to be hidden from the ugly disgusting world

"He's so honest!"
Your mom said at the dinner table
Sure he's honest
But why do You feel like You want to be lied to?

"I'm an honest man so im going to tell you what i really feel"
He said before insulting You in ways you couldn't imagine a dad could
Insulting the way You talk
Walked
Acted
And behaved
and yelling at you as you cried

Hes so honest
But sometimes You want to be lied to
You want your dad to say a pretty lie
To make you feel better

I sigh
you get mad
I get confuse
But apparently
My sigh
Told you
More words
Than I ever could

She drowned in her thought, her sadness and missed dreams
So she sat in the rain
And hoped that would drown her instead

He cried
Not because he was sad
But because he had everything
and yet
He was still sad

I tell my friends I didn't study
Because I knew I wouldn't get in either way
I lied to them
I studied like never before
Flashcards
Notebooks filled with practice questions
Yet
I didn't make the cut
I wasn't good enough

you didnt notice i was crying
even though i was right in front of you
that or you didnt care
either way its safe to say
you failed as a mother

You opened the window and the rain came and wet everything
It’s your fault your room is now destroyed
Your fault because you opened the window
Even though you just wanted a breeze
And needed to breath some fresh air
And couldn’t have predicted that there would’ve been a violent wind
It’s your fault
Your fault

You denied their pain
And could never take the blame
Gaslighted and lied your way out of the truth
Is this really your way of life?
You narcissistic fool

Live in fear
Of an Artist making masterpieces
Based on the pain you've inflicted onto them

She kept swallowing her anger
Every single time
Until it choked her

They laughed at the fish
Because he couldn't climb the tree
And laughed at the koala
Because she couldn't swim

The mind was designed to learn
To expand
And to be curious
So why does school **** so much?

The night you didn't die
Because the rope snapped
Or the razor didn't cut deep enough
Or you didn't take enough pills
You woke up the next day
To realize that nobody noticed

Its not love
Its abuse
Open your eyes
To see the truth

What if you wrote the way you thought?
Unfiltered thoughts
and The Truth
Would you stop writing altogether?

Maybe my cries weren't loud enough
Or my prayers were lost on their way to The Lord
Either way
Can you hear me now Lord?
Can you hear me cry?
Can you hear me scream your name?
Will you answer my pleas?

We hold hands
And bow our heads
In hopes He'll hear our cries
Lord Almighty
Heavenly Father
Have our cries not been loud enough for you to hear?

You want to be my sun,
Drawing me into your orbit, to submission
Again and again.

You want to be my sun,
Radiant and consuming,
But just like the sun,
You burn me with your light,
Again and again

You want to be my sun
But you blind me with your strong glow
I'm blinded and can't see
Is this what you wanted to do to me?

"Gift Of God"
My name means "Gift of God"
What utter hypocrisy
And a weight on my shoulder that my title brings
I am not a gift of God
More like a Burden
I deserve to be objectified for all my sins
"Thirty-Nine" sounds much better
Thirty-Nine like the number
Thirty-Nine like the number of lashes Jesus received
I need to be objectified
This number is just mine

"Im going to **** myself"
You mumbled under your breath
And everyone laughed
Because you were so ******* funny
It wasn't a joke though was it?

Too much noise
It's all too much
I swear even the air is too loud
Why can't they just shut up?

The skin on my body
Doesn't feel like mine
I need to get it off to feel alright

And the lights
**** the lights
As they blind my sight

Why can't I just leave?

And as I wait for your spirited reply
I read and reread your messages
Because you're the only one who remains
In hopes to remember your voice
But all I see are your words written in a Arial font
Separated yet connected by this stupid screen
Its the only way we communicate
Yet it keeps us so apart

That he’s gone
He’s gone
Yet the world keeps spinning
Without a care in the world
Why?

I have the heart of an artist
A poetic heart some might say
And able to feel it all
But with a mind like this
And with thoughts like these
What I really need
Is a heart of a fighter
Decorated with razors
That scream “Don’t touch me”

So much can happen in 14 minutes
He can grab the rope from his closet
And search up how to tie a noose
Then he’ll go to the kitchen
And drag his mothers chair
To his room
And all he’ll write
Is “I’m sorry”
He’ll be gone before you know it

And he cries
Because she wouldn’t open her eyes
To face the truth

Like Fire and Oxygen
We stuck together
I helped your flames grow
While you burned me
But I think my personality overdid it
And you burst into flames
and only left smoke

You asked me for a hundred dollars
And like a dog I ran to get it for you
Counting the few bills and coins I had
I would do anything to keep you happy
I’d rip my heart out of my chest if another man broke your heart
But now you don’t even consider me family

My hips got a little wider
And my chest grew a size or two
“Pay attention to your surroundings”
And
“Keep your head down to not cause unwanted attention”
Was all I heard
I had a hard time paying attention when all I saw was the ground