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87 · Apr 2020
Survivor - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
And if the world should quake

And if the boughs would bend

And if the hearts would break


I'm coming back for you.
I'm crawling back to you.

December 2017.
87 · Feb 2020
Hypocrisy - Z
Batchelor Feb 2020
You saw to that, I'd never stray.
Now everything's tumbling like cards.

Your kisses, were they for naught?
I mean, how could you?

Didn't we promise to grow old together?
Did the sweat of your brow on mine mean nothing?

On this hot asphalt. I'm left alone.
The dissociative identity kicks in and I'm struggling to remind myself why I'm here.

honey it was over before it began
he's so much better.
blame me if you must but know you started the clock.
whatever you feel now you deserve it.

Ah yes. I see it now.
The smokey-eyed stranger.
A scent of days long past.
Soft sounds of lapping water on my feet.
A cloth yet to be stained.
The book that was never read.

and you have no right, love.
shame in grey, shame in color.
you don't deserve love.
the clarions scream and you love in technicolor.
come back again when you can come up here once and for all.
wake up. wake up.

***** it, forgot my pills again.
The first of 2017's series,
Where we bleed into each other,
And my pain starts to leave me, but not without getting deeper.
86 · Apr 2020
Trailing Down - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
The lips of the woman I love, intoxicating.

The way she suckled on my lower lip,
Spellbinding.

Her body convulses with mine, in the sacred bond of the bedroom.


She is mine.
"Just the two of us."

December 2017.
86 · Apr 2020
For A Bad Time - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
The shadows I used to love in
Saturated with noises

The bottoms of heated sands I kept seeing
Showed me the right way for once

I'm hooked, of being a man.
I'm booked, off being in love.
For a bad time, call me.

6th of January 2018.
86 · Apr 2020
In The Depths - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
My flesh is crawling
Coated with the sensations
That were left from yesterday

My heart is cracking
Bound together by hope
That I chose to hold close/dear

My soul is fading
Touched by the end of all things
Where even death may die.
Delve deeper into your own depths, to emerge haunted.

4th of January 2018.
86 · Apr 2020
Autophobia - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
The loudest of the bunch
With sleeves wrapped down

With multiple layers on
Twinkle in his eye


The meekest of the few
With shoulders hunched and huddled

With nary a word to describe her
Too much of a wallflower


By chance, or by fate.
Just the two of them,

Bound by a moment in time forever.

The boy with his scars,
And the girl with her demons.
"Never forget me, never forgive me."

Autumn Love, Spring Romance Of 2017.

September 2017.
86 · Apr 2020
Dream Eater - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
Spill more from your lips

Let me hear one more time

Who's really obsessed with who
Open wide, and spill forth your nightmares.

6th of January 2018.
85 · Apr 2020
Sanguine Bond - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
Between the both of us, was I trying to save you, or did you save the both of us?
And I'm bonded to you, and I wish you could do the same.

13th of January 2018.
85 · Apr 2020
Heel - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
I'm my own long road to ruin.
Long road to ruin, long road to heaven.

17th of January 2018.
85 · Apr 2020
Are We Dead? - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
A different motif
Belying the similar nuances
Catheterization with anguished looks

Delving searching for reprieve
Eversong and evertone
Finding the beat that doesn't exist

Going, going gone
Help me understand what you left me
Internally bleeding your words kept me

Just what did you mean
Kind of you to keep yourself chained up
Lose or win we'll pass out

Maybe you'll break out
No more chrysalis
Omnidirectional truth

Please rise up with the other foot
Quietly without nailing it too
Rest later, figure what and who you are

So again like the year ago
Time has been kind to you
Unclear your intent was

Vouching for perhaps a perfect moment
Waiting for the definition of insanity
Xanthic your bones become

You are so much more than this.
Zymotic you cannot continue to be.
Now you know your alphabets.

December 2017.
84 · Feb 2020
REWIND
Batchelor Feb 2020
She held my hand and I went to places that only I and her knew and it was during such times I knew I loved her and I became someone else and I remembered her warm breath on my cheek and she didn't shy away

Shied away, from the world. Cold air around my lips. I'm someone else, after all that's happened. Places, either burnt down or burning like bridges. Her lips still felt cold.
Her hands gone, only mine left.

She loved to see my smile and I did all I could to keep her smiling told her that her smile would make others envy her for her smile lit up darkest corners of my Earth I couldn't stop holding her

Hated my features, and so I withdrew, attempting to please her. But I know, I existed. She existed. But what for? Shadows return, anyway. The stronger the light, the harder shadows hit..but I'll rewind-
Rewind, to the time there was nothing but perpetual snow.

2013.
83 · Apr 2020
Identity - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Identity, of what some of us lack, which some of us get swallowed up by. The feeling of your words, the nuances of your tone, the emotive language of your being. We're caught up in different covers, the beds we left unfulfilled, glasses left half-empty with patchwork flesh bound with less-than reliable memories. Fog clouds our vision in the mirror, bodies that feel foreign, as if the skin's innards are someone, or something else's.
There you go again, with the next Adonis that gives you a smile.

Perish anyway.

December 2017.
83 · Apr 2020
Exquisite Blood - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
Feel the warmth emanating from the fuzzy feeling in your chest, instead of the sensation of the thorny roses in your palm.
Dissociate from the reality of the situation.

13th of January 2018.
83 · Apr 2020
Heartache - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
I'm done tracing for others.
Try as I may, her whispers kept derailing me.

But when I listen closely,
Eavesdropping on my very own soul,
Gasping at the horrid truth,
I know now, it is not about her.
Now, with renewed purpose, yet with a shaky will.
Some things can never be reconciled.
Feel my voice crack and heart ache.

17th of January 2018.
Batchelor Apr 2020
We're fiction as long we're not within grasp
My diction requires your palm on my crown
Your friction may just feed me benediction.


The heart's jurisdiction is a fickle contraption
A not so subtle crucifixion nor constriction
Ensued when I fought against interdiction

You've become my addiction, my mental preoccupied obsession.
A depiction of dereliction's eviction.
Never again will there be remission's nonfiction.
"You've become my addiction, my mental preoccupied obsession.."

Autumn Love, Spring Romance Of 2017.

September 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
The bones ache, down to the marrow.

Creaking and sighing til you come back.

It's gonna take a while to get the skin used to your absence.

It's gonna be a while before the poison wears off.

Yours is the language of the body which I have to stop speaking.
Bilateral, aching.

October 2017.
80 · Apr 2020
Dear Gepetto - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
I can't be quiet. I need to be constantly moving. I'm worried if the onyx eyes I have stop blinking, if I stop and fall silent, like the clockwork flesh golem I am, I'll fall over and never wake again.
Keep moving.

December 2017.
78 · Apr 2020
Bleeding Out - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
There's no small amount of desperation seeping out of the cracks.


The sickness within suppressed by sheer effort of will.


The left scars ache with the fires that locked away language of the body.


The right thing perhaps to do is leave.


But I don't want to break from your side,

And the ground screams goodbye.
Gasp.

November 2017.
78 · Apr 2020
Reptile - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Cold feet, uncertainty left wide open

Irony striking true

My fears unleashed on the streets

Brought to life once more

Cold blooded reptiles prowl the square

Incessantly I claw at my skin

Peeling, shedding and bleeding

Biting down, doubling down

Cold scaly smooth ridged skin beneath

Under cold moonlight

I'll bare my fangs for the hunt

To find anywhere but here.
Away from here.

December 2017.
78 · Apr 2020
Parted Gates - TBOUT
Batchelor Apr 2020
Her scent brings me home.

When our lips brush against each other,
It is with the brilliance of a thousand fireflies.

But when they part, they do so with the reluctance of too many farewells on train carriages.
Part those lips for one more dance.

9th of January 2018.
77 · Apr 2020
Passive - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
I have simply, hungered for more than just your touch.

What other way to combine two desires into one?

What could be more natural than to consume each other?

Maybe it'll start with little kisses,

Then caressing necks.

Then giving each other lovebites.

Wearing these ****** gorgeous purple bruises as badges of honour.

Draw a tiny bit of blood, and we take one tiny step into vampirism.

But we don't lap at each other's open wounds, do we?

It's the worst kind of hypocrisy.

And passively we lay down, bleeding out.
"Passive aggressive *******."

December 2017.
77 · Apr 2020
F-Ing - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
You startled me, as if you were

Skulking about, tip-toeing like you were

Stalking around, hanging around like you were

Prowling about, shimmying everywhere!
"Get out of here, Stalker!"

December 2017.
76 · Apr 2020
The Proposal - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Hello there.

It has been five years now to the day I met you in person again.

After like, years of not meeting.

Five years plus a few days.

Ah.

If someone told me five years ago I'd be what I am now, I'd probably laugh my *** all the way to the Singapore River and threw myself into it.
(you know I can't swim.)

I wasn't always like this, you know that don't you?

Bitter, bitter heart of mine.

Though it is precisely why bitterness enjoys misery's company : bitterness provides the bleak landscape which misery just sits and broods for days on end.


But then again, I wonder.

Did your coming into my life herald my restart?

Was it the end of my reign of dysphoria, the king in black with eyes that mirror nothing but echoes of yesteryear?

Perhaps, just perhaps.


That one day I made my decision to honour both of us.

To fully enclose myself, wrap my soul around yours.

The warmth of acceptance and eternal patience for one such as I.


I remember how much you hated me writing.

I remember how much you hated me recalling about moments past.

I remember most bitter moments, and wash them with water when you leave me all alone.


But I keep your smiles close to my heart.

Remember how we first went out?


Through the glass, right?



Ah.

So much transpired since then.


Funny how I've become synonymous with you and antagonistic to others.




Perhaps they were the kindling so I could step upon the grey expanse of ash.



I don't regret the choices I made.


Choices imply responsibility.

And all this time I thought I had responsibility over myself.

But I didn't.


She once told me to love myself.
She once told me to be good
She once told me many things, but I never once was any of them.



Funny.

I'm supposed to say something melodic or dissonant here.


Isn't that what I do best, poetry?


But no.


This is no poem.


This is no love letter.


This is no song.


This is someone who has been beaten black and blue.


This is someone who is numb.


Someone who would laugh as the whole world quite literally burns around him and perish screaming, fingers raised in a one gun salute.


This is a confession.


This is me no longer in doubt.


It's a rocky road ahead.


Surprisingly, we taught each other how to love.


I, with my scars.


You, with your demons.


Your feet and mine in a shy embrace.


The difference between us like how one would view the moon and the stars from down below.


Yet fail to notice, the moon and the stars will forever be closer than those down below will ever be.


With a simple task and clear intent, but a blatant disregard for preservation, a malevolent will.

Even though this is all happening, this immolated man spent moments frozen in eternity with your eyes open wide, a circle immaculate, the simplest bewitching of a non-physical drug candy.



With calculated movements befitting the only dance we'll forever do with each other.


For every second crawling by, feeding the smouldering flames between us, harkening to the start of it all.


Happy birthday my love.


Here's to us again.

Here's to you.


Love, ZHB.
And the last poem for Autumn Love, Spring Romance Of 2017.

September 2017.
76 · Apr 2020
Artist's Gospel - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
We're all a beautiful mess,

A canvas with a thousand painters,

Using pallid palettes for a stroke of brilliance,

And leaving the same way we all entered.
"This is gospel, for the fallen ones, locked away in permanent slumber."

December 2017.
75 · Apr 2020
Blue Fire - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
One day we'll find significance/We'll scour the Earth for meaning


I know it so because I've been here/The aching bones scream for rest



We just have to believe/Fire everywhere and none of it passion



Bid our time/The same old **** the same old lies the same everyday



Love conquers all/Bleeding time, wasting away in meaningless motions



The tides push & pull ever closer/Imperfect harmonies


Life, a pendulum.\Life, a dowsing.\Life, cosmic horror.\Life, a spark.



The cacophony upon several melodies shattering coherence, bleeding.


Bleeding, kicking, screaming, the feminine bloodsport, the masculine lullaby.
Black and white.

December 2017.
74 · Apr 2020
For Dear Starling - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
A piece of red string was cut recently,

Even if I didn't feel it,

I saw time itself unravel, unexisting.

O sweet starling, starlight.

Understand we can't reach out anymore
Dead eyes

Ample lips

A mind as broken

I leave.

October 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
Regina meum, peccatum meum, mi domina.**

Terrifying feeling of something new.
As your lips trailed down my neck.


Terrible things I felt in my body,
As my mind fell to black.


It's a maddening twist of fate.

I'm forever yours now, aren't I?
O killer queen.

December 2017.
74 · Feb 2020
Something painful
Batchelor Feb 2020
And the best things about her were never how she dressed.
Neither when she danced circles around me when she held my hand.
It was as simple and unsettling like an open flame, that I held for warmth and to feel.
The line blurred between us for my surrealism and hard drawn lines for reality.
Maybe it was the knife edge she gave me as I traced runes on my left arm.
Mystical experiences that left blood on my lips. Was that it?
I am the child of the sun, and she was the space in between my heavenly Father and just like her signsake, she keeps me in places where I never have been.. and never will again.
I'm where I should be.
And I'll never be again whole.
Just like how movements are fluid, and how feelings are fleeting.
Firespark. Dreamstate. Singing in silence.
That, is the best thing.
And with her.
Me, to you.
The beginning of the merger between The Red Queen and The King In Black, circa 2013.
73 · Apr 2020
Baptism - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
I'm all out of words for now

Running on empty

Lavishing attention

Quiet night

The concept of home shattered

Peace is a word I repeat to myself

I'm all out of feeling for now

Stopped to breathe in

Hiding away

Screaming midday

My last bastion gone

Love is a word I repeat to myself

To obtain semantic satiation

I'm back

Not as me

But as The Beast.
A baptism of fire and tears.
May 2017.
73 · Apr 2020
Hush - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
She is my silent purpose

My unwritten desire

Until one day she realizes

I'm the little pretender

Never getting tired of her.
Come even closer and hush.

December 2017.
73 · Apr 2020
Wine & Blood - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Bells continued to chime through cathedrals unseen.

On shattered knees, imagery of our dawn settled on the confessional window.



I'm learning to live on without your honeypot taste.
Exude your temptation.

November 2017.
73 · Apr 2020
Kenopsia - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
And as the tides rolled in

Sun peering at us at she woke

The dark lights falling away

I peered over my shoulder


To your alabaster image.
"Moon so bright, night so fine."

December 2017.
73 · Apr 2020
The Tears Run Dry - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Her tension, was palpable.

Tears drenched her face,

Like a waterfall that never knew end.

She picked herself up,

And swallowed herself whole.

Just like her namesake,

She shut herself off.

Fading back to her Wonderland.
Knowledge Seeker, here's to you.

November 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
The silent tick of the clock
Brings me home to you

The silent tick of the clock
Brings me home, to you.

You are the unwritten sensation,
The unspoken passion.

Held passively,
Arms bound around my skin,

Just the two of us,
In this moment forever.
Hold me, darl.

Autumn Love, Spring Romance Of 2017.

September 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
Beauty** :
A lapse in judgement brought to life.

(Some actors in the story bear resemblance to what we imagined lost)


Lust  :

A soft growl into a low roar.

(Come here often?)



Rage  :

The cacophonous tears of grief turned into fuel for fire.


(You cannot possibly understand the hate I have.)


Joy  :

Their faces turned up just as quickly as their skin prickled, and their eyes shone with primal brilliance.


(Smile.)



Bitterness  :


The hard, long gulp going down your throat as you feel yourself slowly choking.


(Her uncertainty led to such)



Acceptance   :


A man who thought he had everything under control, and realising he doesn't.

(Nothing ever, stays the same.)

Sadness  :


A mourning dove.


(Looking at you through the glass)



Grief  :


Head down, arms raised towards the sky.



(But all I want is you.)


Her  :


The intensity of fire, with none of its ire.
The promise of earth, without diminish.
The mutability of water, yet soothing.
The vastness of air, and space for us.
Our basic space.
"A little more
Every day
Falls apart and
Slips away
I don't mind
I'm okay
Wish it didn't
Have to end this way"

July 2017.
72 · Apr 2020
Snowblind - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
In the first moment of truth there is brilliance.

In the second moment of truth there is clarity.

In the last moment of truth there is resignation ; the tunnel of darkness exploding into light.
Kiss the world with winter flowers.
Bare my name in frozen hours.

October 2017.
70 · Apr 2020
Lover's Recompense - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
The sun might rise over you.

The days may grow longer and more pleasurable with you.


The night might belong to me.

The nights, cocoon us in our endeavors.


Time keeps ticking by.


Your smile canonised my feelings.


Clueless as we were, we couldn't get enough of that feeling.
The slow ticking of the divorce between the melding of the amalgamation of love and pain.
June 2017.
70 · Apr 2020
Blood - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
And this is where I start bleeding into you.

This is where I start bleeding into you.


You're a canvas I long to be filling it in for.


This is where I start bleeding into you.
No confession, just obsession, my only mortal act of indignation.
June 2017.
70 · Apr 2020
Lover's Grace - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Kiss her. Kiss her until the creases and folds of her mouth fall into yours, your secret symphony together.

Run your fingers down her head, furrowing into hair, down her neck along her spine, and kiss her even deeper than before.

Hold her face, gently, as if a mere tug would dispel this sacred moment between you both. Delve deeper into her lips, form things unspoken.

Surrender to the chill down your spine.
That's the Sadness leaving your body.
Don't think. Just feel. Become one, until you cannot tell where you end and she begins.

Kiss her. Kiss her again, to breathe her in, her alpha and your omega.
The beginning of April 2017, and the true beginning of a smooth-contoured ending of uncertainty in my veins. Kiss, dip, swoon.
My dear lover.
Here is the Lover's series.
Batchelor Apr 2020
Sun, where we began and danced in her light until we grew tired of being and went apart from each other, promising to write snail mail and songs.
Mercury, where we collided and saw each other for the last time, hurtling towards a great unknown.
Venus, where we never knew strife and bargain, to begin with a step back and two steps forward, enchanted by all she had to offer.
Earth, was where we found each other, after walking quite a distance away from each other, only to meet again along the infinite line.
Moon, where the concept of death became alien and we danced to the ebbing of waves on the cold shores lit ablaze by the bonfires in our hearts.
Mars, where the idea of war entered our souls and waged war we did, turning whole empires into ash with our weaknesses and humanity.
Jupiter, where it was decreed our penance would be great, and humility would be in our bones before long.
Saturn, when we knew our time tending to orchards and vineyards for our sins would be over, and we danced until the morning light.
Uranus, whole and plain for us to see, the empty void of unchange making our souls sick, for everyday was exactly the same.
Neptune, where we finally settled on the same shores we met each other at first, and held each other closer than we ever did, as time itself stopped.
A love letter that took almost 6 months to create, since the author was stuck on the Moon line for a bit longer than usual.

Hello, love. My Red Queen.

August 2017.
69 · Apr 2020
Superstar - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
A minute to make some noise

A lifetime of tiny cracks

Buttered up, swallowed up stage fright

Bitter, sour sweet milk flowed into her.
Definitely not a SFW star.

December 2017.
69 · Apr 2020
Our Perfect Circle - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
"Now, bow, dip, twist and turn."

Now, vow, lip, trust and yearn.


Are you hungry?

Time like a yarn,

Love like a dream, causing fluster,

Making bluster.


Are you in love?

Rhymes like ****,

Love licking off cream, causing blusher,

Making bluster.
Two steps forward, half step back.


Autumn Love, Spring Romance Of 2017.

September 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
Your bitter synopsis
A raging storm but quite pointless bluster
Slamming against an echo chamber
Like the empty vessel you are


My practiced charade
Masks and more masks
Hidden away my visage
For my eyes would betray my thoughts


Her eternal solitude
Penance she pays
For the sins never wrought
In permanent slumber.


His silent auction
He doesn't believe in words anymore
Actions drag him closer to the edge
Making a choice he'll never regret


Their solemn vigil
Below neon lights
With smiles long practiced
And temples beyond restoring

Our voices harmonic
As we breathe
With that feeling
Fire scorching nerves
Drowning in sensation
Grounded in the moment
Lost in the space between us.
A manic conglomeration.

October 2017.
68 · Apr 2020
Ashes - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
Gather the rest of your bones that charred when the end came.

Grab the last pieces that used to make you, you.


Soon, from the ashes that fall.


You'll become one again.
The infancy of 2019's iconic "Descend, Transcend, Ascend."
June 2017, after he left them all behind, to start anew.
Batchelor Apr 2020
All the love and all the pain
Fleeting and permanent.

Etched in our skulls like the pumping of blood
Circling and twisting like no end for the morrow.

As the load on my shoulders begins to ebb, my spirit feels lighter than it has been in years.

Give into love, he calls.
Go back to the basics.

Slowly this disfigured heart of mine unravels itself, shedding tears I never knew I had.

Like it had been ran over by too many emotions.

A snide remark here, an abusive yell there.

I give in and tell myself it's alright.

A dream lost, firespark lost.

I celebrate my life.

And I move on.
A blackguard, with the sheen of a maharajah disowned.
March 2017.
67 · Apr 2020
Crashing Rave-venants - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
I do not follow by example.
I make my own path.
With bloodied palms and weeping tears.

With dreams buried and feelings hidden.
I am your blade.


And the clock chimes, turns, burns our time away.
Needing satisfaction, doing all you can to breathe her in.


Three times the tears blare with siren calls for home
You should have seen this, you should have held me tighter.


Onomatopoeia, hear my name and tremble.
Unfavorable, unfortunate, and unfair this is.
The author goes on a power trip,
And the high doesn't end til much, much later.
(It takes two years, almost three.)
May 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
It's a funny metallic feeling,

A ****** taste in my mouth,

A slight despair filled with minor joy.



You're me.

And I'm you.

Without you there is no me.

Dying for you, dying for me.

Perhaps saying it makes it right,

Perhaps saying it makes it true.


Reach out to me in your sleep.

Walk alongside me in my waking hours.


Shadow my every step,

Follow each motion through.


Marry the left with right,

Kiss the top of each other's forehead.


The king in black meets a foe he has been fighting for far too long.


The seer in white comes out to hold the king's hands with the words he has been waiting for a lifetime to hear again.


"I forgive you."
Black Light.

October 2017.
66 · Apr 2020
Boredom - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
They all feel the same.


The soft, thin lips

The thick, creamy feel.


The hunger doesn't arise.
Entertain me, with your meaningless hip movements, gyrations and suckling lips.
They taste the same, feel the same.
I prefer to hunt, not have prey willingly die.
May 2017.
Batchelor Apr 2020
You are to me, like how blood and wine are interchangeable, mutable.

I am to you, the raging storm passing by the coast, cold relief down your spine.


Both together, hand in hand, an addictive desire to better oneself, and the lust for ruination.


You are the ghost I'll never give up.
Start from nothing, to become something, and finally everything.

Autumn Love, Spring Romance Of 2017.

September 2017.
66 · Apr 2020
Nosce Te Ipsum - Z
Batchelor Apr 2020
So you want my name then?

Which one do you want?

The one I call myself by,
Or what people call me?


Names have power.

And I'm only going to give you one.
'Know yourself."

December 2017.
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