How do you ask for help
Without hating the words as they come out?
How can I open up
when as soon as I've said it I regret it
I am an actress
A poet
A writer
And yet I'm not good with words
Not when they tear open parts of my soul
I want to keep sealed

Every day is another fight
With words twisted into knives
And sentences hurled like spears
I can't stop it
Anger lives in my like Lava in a volcano
Spirting ash and smoke till it finally explodes
I want to go somewhere else
But where can you go when everyone is so far away
My soul calls for freedom
Like an abandoned bird calls to its flock
But it never answers
And is out of my reach as the ledge of stability slowly crumble beneath me

They say home is where your family is
But what happens when home no longer feels like home
and you have nowhere left to go

The people who say nature doesn’t have a life of its own
Have never asked the fire to dance
And had the fire say yes

I never meant it to go this far
I always said I would stop before I did something I'd regret
But the truth is
I don't regret it
Even as the blood runs across my arm
And the knife stings my skin
I don't regret nor feel bad for what I've done
And I don't want to stop
Part of me is beginning to wonder
When will it be far enough

Thoughts are and interesting thing
They can drive you mad
Or keep you sane
They can calm you down
Or freak you out
They can keep you up
Or put you to sleep
But even when no one else is there
Your always have your thoughts

I feel like I'm losing you
And tears run down my face
and I try to grasp what that could mean
the person who stood by my side through everything
the only one I told when things got rough
and the first person to know when it really counted
but I can't do a one-sided friendship
and as I watch your fingers slip through mine as I fall
I feel my heart shatter like glass on the floor
goodbye
-Someone who cared