I know it's not
But if you consider the bold arrogance of all this
You begin to understand where the seething starts
You swear you are being forced to waste the time
But it doesn't matter
Because you would hate the thing that wasted it
It's blubbering mouth trying to explain to you
We've all been painted by numbers

I swear I swear I'm not the sky
Don't hate me

The thing is saying

And this is why I always think
I've got my work cut out for me
That must be me at different points
Right now or down the road
Trying to forgive the thing for not being that great
And accepting that I "have enough"

But "stay hungry kid"
Always fight for more
Always fight for better
You gotta be kidding me

I know you will not bow,
You don't have to say it

The idea of you even having to bow is emergent
I didn't ask for this set of parameters
To work with

But that is how it is,
The table's set
There is nothing you can do about it.

Enjoy, you are forced to
Suffer bad, you are forced
Suffer light, you are forced
Feel love, it's a force
Use the word love, that's a force
Lie, it's a force
Everything forced

Doesn't matter, if those are the terms they are pushing back
As you would were you in that situation.

And the whole thing understands itself
And will never understand itself at all.

So like I said,
I know you won't bow
I know you're angry
I know you have hate

You don't have to say it,
I already understand.

(Oh, and by the way,
This is all connected to science,
It has analogs in physics, chemistry,
Biology, psychology, language,
It is not just some crazy rambling of
Oh nevermind,
I always forget you can't just do that
And then you're some kind of credible great thinker)

I have heard your stories of clay feet,
I guess you think you'll bring me to my knees!

Well, you can just always say that
But I just think it's cheap!

But... you were just warning me
The heavy head, the doom I hide or sell
And mocking is so easy to decry,
When I laugh astride of hell!

So if anything's ever funny,
I'm not too sure you'd take it well...

But still. I have heard your stories of clay feet.
Why me, why me?
Why does any one of us have to crumble,
And why does anyone have to take the lead?

I guess we just became round,
I guess we just have a need.

So yes they will resent you
Hate will come shooting out
And yes they understand
As love just abounds!
And yes you will seem stupid
Because we never figured it out.
But you are insanely brilliant,
No, you're not a clown!
And yes it's quite the burden
With many shades of grey
And yes it's sometimes easy
We love you and you're gay!
And yes they la la la la
But no it da da da
And yes you ba ba bada
And no sha sha sha sha

His cautious head is lowered
The scrawny grey wolf watches
And waits his turn

Big brothers are feeding,
He knows not to interrupt.

But he can't see that in his brainstem
Telling his heart to beat
That is where the big wolves are
And he is on the side of a kaleidoscope.

But he doesn't know that he'd go in between
Look for ways to save wolf meat
And all the bucks with their snarled teeth

So he mutates all his leaves
And liquifies his spirit
Summons his chemistry from crystal water molecules.

So he sheds his skin and follows breaks in symmetry
So he varies locally
And complexifies

So he radiates anew
So he watch the spirits run
And he saves the wolf meat,
He no eat.

What if your sense
Of wanting satisfaction
Was tied
To the means by which you'd achieve it?

What if I knew you wanted to win,
And both meant to let you down on that point
But also had nothing to do with your failure?

What if the chemicals of your brain
And its physiology
Were truly rigged against you? For you? Both,
At the same time,
and neither?

What if I'm tired of listening to how bored you are,
When I know the horrors you'll face?
What if I'm capable of things you will never be capable of,
No matter how hard you tried?

What if I'm always worthy,
And you have to accept you're lucky we give you anything?

Let's talk about the way it's been
Elusive and my wagging tongue
Is muted behind clicking teeth
With fingers finding quick release

So strange, and strange sensation comes
Awareness of the deep conflict
A writhing dance I keep inside
Cause you can't be that good at math.

You can't be that good at math.

And after everything goes down,
Where will hesitation go?
With remorse and empathy
Right out the window
Well I'm waiting for the day
The defenestration comes
I'll never know how much you loved me
Guess nirvana's really dumb

And you
Can't really be that good at math.
No, you
Can't really be that good at math.
We got problems, honey
Bigger than the place that we come from
You can't be that good at math
You can't be the only one

I am the providence of meaning
My thoughts are like kites on the wind

I'm tied to the moonlit shoreline

Waves rearrange the sand,
Agitating it
Sharing whale songs with the clams
And leaving little foam gifts.

Those purple clouds are far away but they are real,
You could fly through them as a bird,
Swoop down and skim the waves with your feet

My thoughts are like moonlit kites
My thoughts are like the nighttime gulls
Dark blue, navy blue
With purple clouds and ***** of light
My strings are taut
And my skin is flecked with salt,

Goodnight!