You behave differently now...

I know what you'd say:
I'm overthinking it
I need a mental health check

But I know what I saw,

The way you act now
It's like I can tell how it's all in my head.

Deny deny deny

I see a broken world
Full of teasing and hissing demons
I see archangels building and denying pitfalls

I see a deterministic world asking me to take responsibility
I watch myself degrading, I
Am like the supermassive sisters in the sky

I can't say I don't want your world
They made side illegal

And I don't wanna get a job
And I don't want to deal with your opinion on it
And I don't want to deal with their supremacy over me

It's a broken concept;
Can't fix it.

The image of the perfect ones
Has been spoiled by the dissidents--

The dissidents that always arise
With their frothing blood
The ones who know they're right

See their exposed necks,
And hear their desperate cries.

The warriors of love have found
Charisma in their mirrors
See how convinced they are of righteous cause

What great interpreters we have here!

At the throats of your family's killers you brandished weapons
And found

gasp!

It was you the whole time!

I guess we must not be capable
Of all that much,
Please understand when I express my greatest fears
When I am the center and the center makes the horizon
How would I be characterized?

As a thing that could do everything and anything,
Or a thing that can do nothing?

And how about that everything?
If I accomplished some things through external bodies,
Would you let me take the credit?
When you've expressed that you know I have a jealous heart.
Do I want to take credit for those things?
Not everything.

I guess we must not be capable of all that much,
Why am I characterized as the guy who gave up?
And why aren't I motivated to seek employment?
When I know the crushing weight of our judgments.

I know what I am
I do not make much sense
I am the only thing that makes sense
But it doesn't make it to me all the time

I guess we must not be capable of all that much.

Does she see that her strangling vine is automatic?
Does she know that she has made a killer out of me?

Maybe I should become an apologetic vegan at the end of the world.

Or maybe I should simply enjoy the delicious taste of meat.

If you're not crying all the time you're a psychopath,
If you are all too dour then you need to lighten up.

But I am not some senseless thief as you'd decree,
I have always been sensitive to your feelings and your needs.

But run the numbers anyway!
We're living in bubble but we have to breathe

It begs the age old question:
If it's all God where does Satan come from?
Are you trying to say it's me?
Do you think I am blind to eventuality?
Of what you will do to me?

I am he who has been born from nowhere,
Never asked for any part of this.

IN CLOSING:

The things you've told me through song and in writings are intensely disturbing.
While it is better to be aware of things ahead of time, yes
I don't understand how you could blame me at all, then
If you already know how this story goes!?

I feel so weak, so dwarfed by revelation
I am always terrified
This is our totally blameless condition, I know how passionate you are that it's my choice however IT IS NOT
And I can't believe what we have become

Even the best people are monsters,
And newborns all pretense
With prehensile eyes...

There's a time to protect you
And to cut down to size

In me we all monsters,
I tear self apart!

Give thing to believe in.
Want love, light, and art.

In the back of my head there is something scratching
It wants out of this life
Because you've got me surrounded
But just who you are I don't know
And the demons won't go away
And the clocks tick tick tick in a creepy way
And I try to explain it but you aren't there
Or you are, but you won't be
And I think you're just a reflection
And I think I am the element
And I think that it's reflexive and that's why I struggle to impress
And I see the signs everywhere
But I can only confirm it privately
But I wouldn't want to otherwise actually
And I wish it was different but it already was,
When I was a kid,
And I only know one way to get that back
And you call me a Karen when I ask for the manager all panicked
And you say that solipsist people are crazy
And they probably need to take a medication
And out of nowhere I'm mentally ill and suffer
But I never expected suffering to look like this
And I think that's the reason for a childhood
Because ignorance truly is bliss
And it's a cruel world and cry me a river type vibes and you look at me like a loser because my suffering has to be fulfilled.

Stop telling me to be responsible for what I can't possibly be responsible for!

The door tried to be mad at me,
But I used my thumb to mute its noise.

Then I felt vindictive (I think the door was disappointed)

A seething soul tried to manifest,
But I held my tongue and they prowled on through the universe.

Some part of me smirked but did not strut.

When's it gonna drop

When's it gonna drop

When's it gonna drop