Here I am
In front of you
So won’t you just
Hold my hand
And comfort me
Into sleep.

Here I am
Beneath the trees
So won’t you just
Lead me away
And hold me here
Into sleep

Here I am
Under the stars
I can see you
Following them
Away from me
Into sleep.

Here I am
To believe
But my knees are weak
And palms unclean

Walk away
Away from me
Into sleep I go..

Into sleep...

Where am I if I’m not standing,
There’s a play I want to be in,
I wish I didn’t shake and cry,
Every time I try to fight back.

My arms go limp,
Then my eyes tear up,
Finally, I loose all feeling in my legs,
I refuse to hand in my self-respect.

I hurt the morals I stand for,
No I won't lower the bar I set,
There’s a pale morning light but,
I still haven’t understood where my hands lay.

My arms go limp,
Then my eyes tear up,
Finally, I loose all feeling in my legs,
I refuse to hand in my self-respect.

Worked so hard to find my peaceful twilight hour,
At some point I’ll pull a golden curtain's rope,
Something that never comes without a fine,
I will not keep my pride for your sake,
I know not all that I say is right
There’s a stage and a song that calls,
I’m going on, entering from stage right,
Tripping over my ankles but that’s in the script.
Upon the stage I see there’s a telephone,
I answer to find my stage directions,
Follow until the prologue completes,
I won’t need directions for Chapter 1.

My arms go limp,
Then my eyes tear up,
Finally, I loose all feeling in my legs,
I refuse to hand in my self-respect.

Everyday, I can see through the drafts,
You're sleepier with every hitch,
The snow's seeming closer as the days grow longer,
And once the longest day of the year pasts,
I know we'll still forge on through mountains.

Mount Everest will be jealous by the amount of people you've killed,
From your everlasting freezing weathered heart,
Maybe you didn't mean to but I won't allow myself to leave,
I'll put on some mountain boots and hike,
Up your slopes I will forge on.

The vices inside that repeat your new boot turned over,
How you've changed, my love, it's inspiring,
Even to the towering Himalayas,
I'll watch you eat some ***** snow before you spit it up,
You're starting to hate the taste and want some fresh ice,
I understand that you're getting too hot.

Mount Everest will be jealous by the amount of people you've killed,
From your everlasting freezing weathered heart,
Maybe you didn't mean to but I won't allow myself to leave,
I'll put on some mountain boots and hike,
Up your slopes I will forge on.

Things are killing me and tearing me up,
Inside out,
Guts to eyes,
Wreck my vibe in discordant nights,
I’m afraid that I’ll loose control and take back my tar black crown.

I’m the ruler of a tainted empire,
I’m the saint that your mother warned you of,
I’ll cut you down and string you up along the forest paths.

I won’t cross my fingers cause I’m not scared to die,
Breaking bones,
Come on home,
I’ll hold you down and bruise your back,
You’re the victim of God tonight.

I’m the ruler of a tainted empire,
I’m the saint that your mother warned you of,
I’ll cut you down and string you up along the forest paths.

I’m just your average boy,
Black fingers and black roses,
Corrupted carnage carriages,
Scared for your family are you now?
I’ve the lord of your life,
Now kneel before I make you, my darlings...

Potholes, I'm swerving in and out,
Botched lips, hooked on tripping n' falling,
Taught ya', that you're perfectly alright,
The way that you are.

Stop the sound of unsatisfaction.

Passenger seat, I know that it's you,
Asking her again, "Talk to me again, dear."
Massacred eyes, the confusion doesn't scare me,
Cause you're the best that I've got.

Stop the sound of unsatisfaction.

Unwell boy, went to the acute again,
Sell everything, this stress will be undone,
Now yell, I won't watch myself fall,
so I will hold onto you.

Sunrise is my best friend,
When I’m up till 4am,
Kindly trying to pretend,
I chose her to defend,
But in the end,
Solar flares can’t amend.

Bury my feet in wires,
Spray my hands with fire,
I’ll take the smoke higher,
Blame the flames, I’m not a crier.

I welcome the sunlight in,
It’ll brush against my chin,
Pulling my lips into a grin,
She knows when I’ll begin,
To start a riot with my kin,
But then again,
I will never win.

Bury my feet in wires,
Spray my hands with fire,
I’ll take the smoke higher,
Blame the flames, I’m not a crier.

Don’t you go,
I can’t bare to be alone,
In the evening I’m more prone,
To leave the house and roam,
On the streets, I hear his tone,
The moon knows I’m getting cold,
He’s urging to head on home,
No I won’t
No I won’t
No I won’t

I hope it is sufficient that the reason for my purpose is unknown,
I will try my own **** hardest to prevent my legs from sinking,
The forest surrounding me keeps caving into reckless abandon,
I will finally surrender so I'm back on the ground,
Rocking back and forth to try and plead,  "mercy me!"
Cause simply living feels like a force to reckoned with,
and I just want to get some sleep so that I can face the day,

Won't you let me sleep tonight?
Won't you let me sleep tonight?
Won't you?
Won't you?
Won't you let me sleep tonight?

Despite the ***** crimes closing in on me,
I absolutely cannot see the forest for the trees,
I understand what I need to be another lamb,
but I've been asking for help since the day I thought, "Why?"
I searched and found my soul inside the merciless trees,
Noticed that every hole that I found was deeper than the last,
Despite the fact that I know I've lost myself,
The sun will rise and I'll fear what I don't believe again.

Won't you let me sleep tonight?
Won't you let me sleep tonight?
Won't you?
Won't you?
Won't you let me sleep tonight?

I've been dragging myself around by the hair of my nape,
Searching for my dreams or the goal that I can reach,
Brought back from death for I was fearing life itself,
and for the timeless time that I was there,
I am back again to properly surrender my underestimated power,
Instead I'm slipping down the drain.

Won't you let me sleep tonight?
Won't you let me sleep tonight?
Won't you?
Won't you?
Won't you let me sleep tonight?

Title me, your poem,
I'll tell you who you are and who you were,
I'll tell you all the people who live and die,
I'll tell you about your strengths and weaknesses,
Title me, your poem,
I'll describe your eyes,
I'll describe your mind,
I'll describe your hands and the way they move across the words.
Title me, your love, your creation.

Change this pace,
This year’s home is far away,
I’m okay with it,
This year I’m gonna stand high,
I’m okay with the sound of the future.

Reach out now,
This time I've got my harpoon,
I'm okay with defending you,
This winter has been the best of my last few years.
I'm okay with getting stuck.

I accept it.

I tried so hard to fly,
I tried so hard to walk,
These grounds where the pebbles lay,
Where the glass sticks into my feet,
Like the sand that covers my feet,
Infecting the multiplying wounds,
But I've kept walking.

I don't know how I've made it this far,
But here's to my home and to my family,
And to my friends who stayed when they could,
I trust that this home I've lived will keep me disclosed,
As a neon embroidered gravestone is never what I want,
Play me a song, won't you play me a song?

I'm sick and tired of questioning myself,
Am I enough? Am I purposeful?
It's the bigger picture that I'm worried about,
Never the minute details and happiness,
I'd change if I could but I've wanted something big,
For so many years and to change would be groundbreaking in my head,
Repeat, repeat, repeat, repeat the day.

The night, the light come on inside my head,
Like a porch with little children,
Forcing me out and making me think about,
How it has to be this way,
And how I have to be this dreamer,
In order to pass in order to survive,
yet at this point....what is it really like to survive?
When help always seems to far away,
So far that it hangs in front of my face like a dog to a bone.

In ever aspect of life,
In the aspect of life itself,
Living and breathing seems like a goal,
An achievement that I cannot reach,
I failed to live for you and that's the truth,
I'm sorry, oh god I'm sorry, when there's no path I was supposed to have made.
Cant keep going, can't keep going.
If I pray to God, will he answer when I'm finally gone?
In this dreamlike state, if feels like hell,
The tightness of my chest, the dryness of my tongue, and the twisting in my gut.

I never want to make you cry,
I never want to hurt you,
I never want to stray away like I've been doing,
And everyone asks "what will you do with him?"
"How will you get him out of his own hole now?"
Well but, I'll get rid of those questions for you,
I'll rid the stress of knowing I fail,
That I'll repeat a fight or an argument,
It's unfair, I know it's unfair,
Just believe me when I say that I am not nor never okay.
It's a front, so I don't have to confront your eyes when you say,
All these things that I care about and what do you mean when you say I'm selfish for even thinking so?

And the words in your hands,
Speak to me like a poem,
I'm captivated and interested from the moment you begin,
The lessons you've taught me,
The joys you've made me feel,
I'd stay alive for you, I'd stay alive for your stories,
But things are so far away now and the torment they've put your through deters you from home,
You've made mistakes and maybe I'm one of them,
Though I know you care and that you want me to learn all of the things you've been given,
You know me better than anyone I've ever know,
So please, don't forget me and do forgive me.

My little drama queens,
You walk with a confidence that I cannot describe,
How you both stay so strong and the happiness you envelope,
I wish I understood, though it might be youth, I hope you never change,
My love for your pride in yourself exceeds any other brother alive,
Know that I care, So know that I care.

Friends,
All my wonderful ones, the ones who left, the ones I had to leave behind,
You're all meaningful, I gave each of you a piece of my heart,
Just to remember and know that I learned,
That I learned that I can be worthy,
That I don't have to stagnant,
Standing still, I have to say, cause I don't want dominoes on my hands,
You are worth it,
When my ship goes down,
You climb up,
I'm sorry, so very sorry.

So I'm gonna say,
It's tonight's crime that may bring light to things I've never said,
To things I've called unworthy, like myself.
"How could he go if he's got everything?"
Well In my head, the friends that I've lost,
and the things I've been through saturates the negative,
I'm just a kid and I've got nothing to bring into the light of my head.

I don't know how I've made it this far,
But here's to my home and to my family,
And to my friends who stayed when they could,
I trust that this home I've lived will keep me disclosed,
As a neon embroidered gravestone is never what I want,
Play me a song, won't you play me a song?

I've been denying,
but the fears are multiplying.
Picking at my brain,
and maiming my interests.
all I can think about is the way you smile,
and the way you talk to me.
I fee like a fool for falling into your soul,
cause I'd never be good enough for you.

You're the queen and I'm the jester.
You're no saint but you have me caught in your halo,
So won't you let me into your heart.

The feeling I've held onto,
but locked away inside my heart.
Tearing me up cause I know,
How you really feel about me.
This hope that I hold onto,
Stored inside my lungs so I won't scream.