dreaming away the night, one more pleasure, it feels like something relaxing while I am awake is better than sleep itself, because in my dreams I am always stressed out, running from something, trying to find someone,

my diet has been strange, I only eat when it gets late, something about the late night makes my stomach relax

maybe I really am a vampire

I wrote a few of them down, the Muskrat, now it all seems like a big joke, I kept a few of the ones that I thought were pretty good, kept about 20, wrote almost 200, mania driving my mind away, or maybe I'm destined to dig fast all my life, I'm not really sure at this point

thought about a few things, didn't care to write them down

botched a performance tonight, so what

indulgent, indulgent

the life is not really about me, this thought

gets me through life, I think, it is the poet in me

understanding that my life is of little significance, actually
'
learning to observe without judging
the random cocktail of nerons firing

maybe I went through it to quick

Alan Watts gave this lecture on worrying, and he talked about worrying about worrying , and I just thought to myself, what if there is no self, and our only purpose is to worry all the time, so we may create plastic for gods purpose?  

but seriously, what if there is no self at all, and there is will to power, what if there is nothing wrong with us, how can the cynical be both uplifting and depressing at the same time?  because it is selective cynical, because those who understand move through life easier, get what they want more.  The self the self the self, honesty has its own reward but big stories have greater endings, I like to watch them with popcorn

rantings, nothings, I orinally didn't want to write any of this down, but I had to, stupid stupid stupid, going down the road of halloween logic

To the news
I paid attention to you, I searched for a few answers
for a few seconds
and you taught me a couple of things
there are brutalities, and their are downsides to perfectly cleaned sinks
you told me should and you recommended rulers
I paid attention and then I closed the window
I paid attention to the pictures and read the headlines but didn't actually read the headlong
to the news
I confess, I'm sorry I did this
the problem is I'm prejudiced, and grumpy
and I'm convinced that you aren't going to teach me something I don't already know
then I exited your window
Sorry about that,
Seany

are you a stranger, a villian, or a wonderful story?

cloaked in eagerness, are you bearded and magnificent?  cloaked in sheepishness, are you hatted and stached?  tell me vanity, where u at?

is everything about you and we all lie about it, or is nothing about and you means something when we deny it

I hope that you are not too sensitive to my pondering, I admire your power, it seems to me that people buy a lot of things for your sake,

as religious, as deeply rooted desire, are you intensely desire?  do your eyes burn as my do?  are you tired of people drawing attention to your exterior?  are you gods child?  are you on his mission?

I would understand and respect that, but I'm not sure if thats where you at

are you compare yourself to the light that shines over the mirror or the mirror itself?  do you have a special shelf for products, or are you the messy type?  I could see that you would be the messy type in private but perfectly ornate in public to over-compensate

maybe that was mean, I don't mean to be offensive, I study you because I fancy you, not in a ****** way, admire you, your charm, I'd like to figure you out for my own contemptlations, so that when people talk of you I will have my own rule and the whole conversation would be easier to tune out, I would thank you for that little bit.  


Vanity, have a drink with me, questions questions questions!

for taking my security away, for taking blanket from naked body

I resent like a balding man loses his toupee


scalding hot coffee *** just missing the lap

I fall in love and resent that the gift does not merit consent, the gift does not merit consent

you give a little, you get a little,

that statement is a lie, I will not listen anymore

my love is overwhelming, too perplexing for most to bear, and I am

ousted, laughed at, pigeon holed, left to introspection

left to meal, movie

I fall in love, I give the gift, and I continue breathing

and I get weaker, I resent, I resent

liberal FIasco!! get out of my hair you nibbling twittling tweeting frenzy!  Circus of sole, circus of politicians, dancing with strings, with grins of overnight whitening, of dance, dance, of orient!  Whose in charge, and who is next!  Of line!  Not in the sense of the actors call, no, no, of the line of parliament!  Of the line of veto power!  and the veto power rests in the lap of clooney, whose approval is spoken with a glance from the camera,

Liberal fiasco!! you shuddering thorn in my hat, away with you, where did you come from?  that democratization of art, took it too far, press press press for your issue issue issue, for the children children children,oh you noble big headed liberals, of charity, of farting and calling the shard charity!  you poopsicles!  walking around with swirles on your head, prefer the taste of baby green or delicious brown custard scream?  you pompous boils, of anything but honesty, of swivlling chairs you are, you Oscar, call yourself stone!

love, overwrap, over double, double wrap, bubble tape, put me in a  cardboard box and send me to wherever, it doesn't matter!

in my brows!  getting wet in the eye!  snow ride, snow day, ice skate, hats

fiddling my shoelaces, I cannot tie them!  the zippers are just shiny, just shiny

Love, in my coffee!  I'll take cream today

filler doesn't matter, filler can make thin men fatter and happier

love, the filler, fill my day

just for tonight
hold me tight
I'll expel, I shiver, my legs, my hat falls off the bed
one more cry, tonight, one more, tug at collar
begging, please

one more cry, tonight

Sit and watch the young children begin their lives with a performance
In union square
Posing for a picture
It's so cute
And the onlookers sit on foldibg chairs
And let their lives be of selfless significance
The children dance and yell
And they know life without consequence
Oh just to witness it!  Take me back there
Let me sing too
I sit and smile and sip coffee
Race, gender? No, hugs
The clouds know embrace , the sun peaks behind them
The evening is clear and cool
There are sweaters but no shivers
Hugs!  What joy!
I'll be silly, I hold myself open
Protected elegance
Fear, wanting to be a catcher in the rye.  No!  No need to fear
Make faces, shoulder knees and toes
Am I getting it right?  Oh my heart melts!!  Concern dissipates like their confidence dissipates, feelings omit and pass without suffering
The pigeons search for food indifferent, however nobody chases them off
Micachael jackson and all of his beautiful qualities,
Oh and order, anything but order, no no no not numbers
The stone pillar in the center reads of the Spanish war, oh who cares
Joyous evening no wit necessary
The ancient tradition of watching over our children

The chaos of history
Where we try to find patterns that quickly crumble, where fear of *** is a constant
Fear of free thought is constant
Regret after war is constant
To find organizations of prejudice under the euphemism of protection is constant
Inequality has been constant. I cannot think of a time in history where hierarchy has not existed. This doesn't mean it couldn't ever exist
Perhaps if our empathy was increased by our tools for expression, there would be more equality, if feelings were so out in the open that they couldn't possibly be ignored
That politicians lie for support is a constant

Given these constants, why do we continue to lament?  Because we dream of an ideal, somehow, because we are dis satisfied with what is put in front of us, because as scholars we criticize, why can't we accept?  The individual makes a choice to live for change because he sees the possibility, but he finds that his honesty is misinterpreted and reinterpreted by the ***** to fit an ideal that never was, that the maytr becomes inhuman, a lie of pure soul that was far from the truth of, how perceptions change naturally and the idea of change may be an illusion

That Gandhi did not liberate India, but rather shifted the tides in the right direction as a performer, a martr, that the liberation of India happened on it's own. That a man cannot change the world, but live his life in his own ideal image of it, which influences but does not actually change,

I want to run away from my own thinking
It gets carried away from me, and suddenly I am a victim, or perhaps my self pales in comparison to my emotion, like a small child gazing at the golden gate bridge on a dark night a he huddled in his think windbreaker, it is a hopeless cause, that emotion is as real as any rational thought, that there is no real distinction, the idea that everything is about *** except for ***, *** is about power, but emotion is not about power, it is from a scours that is beyond the animal, it is absolutely an completely human and alien to the natural world, I am pale to the comparison of this life, and my emotion drives my passion, and in my rational mind I am hungry for food and drink and for power, rationality, the animal instinct, that I fear death when I am rational, how pathetic and now time consuming and how completely undeserving of the following feeling of pervasiveness, that I am capable of anything and death is my fate no matter what my choosing, oh, I will choose the former every time, until my rationality dies, yes I will go gently into that good night

I weep and I beg, please take me away
I weep and I beg, please take me away
I weep and I beg, please take me away
I weep and I beg, please take me away

Time passing the clock ticking, tick, tick tick, the rattle of the water battle, the wobble of the support for my laptop, all working in tandem, oh, dreary delight of my god,

thank you for all you have blessed me with, my life has so many wonderful qualities that I get to cherish,

art and music and poetry are all so beautiful, Nietzsche would be proud about me doing it

there are people doing all kinds of things, and all of their lives have significance, there is a force driving them, beyond what we can understand

I indulge, I feel touched

hmmmmm


rooftops lights on in the house, hm, the over arching, the branches reaching, plants lampshades, tanbark and grass, hmmm deserves to be named, hmm, in the background a rake,  a call, response, ohh, of shallow breath, not wanting to break the moment, the bike, parked on its side, ready for a ride, laughing at the mistakes, laughing at the wrong, everything has fallen into place, into lap, where it can be pet like a cat, hmmmmm, inside, the light, inside, the light, no pantries opening, in the distance a call, a response, the rake, the rake, the sounds spin into the silence like a slender yo yo, wooden, craft, roll back, roll back

sitting back, letting the world be where its at, with mind open towards the sky, with the phone polls thinking off their fair, their electric current flows to a bulb that is calm, pulsing, its one of those evenings, crows, and different types of mosquitoes, cold enough for a scarf, reechhing screeching the tentative cat trying to make his next plan, escaping into the house where he may resume his limitless pleasantries, lifting up his spirits  with the fireplace

the delightful conversation, of honor, their is so much duty in the things we do, duty delights in its own way, honesty has its own reward, we heard letterman say it to a louis that was frowning, and the characters represented themselves, an extension of their characters, and louis went on being a genius and lettermen went on being a *****

pleasantries are present when we least expect it, the fuzz from the monitor, there isn't much worry about how ***** the computer gets, it adds character, wisdom, se lavi or whatever it is the french say tossing hands up in the air and leaving it up to probability, or uncertainty, what a pleasant feeling

pleasantries in the dress, the particular white collared shirt with the pressed jacket, shoes that shine, in glances and martini glasses, in steps down the stairs that feel of anchores, anchores somewhere beneath those grand steps that provide some kind of magnificent gravitational gradiose spectacular, pleasantries in how much we aren't even aware

just a few more moments with I and I, just a few more bounds, the world really isn't about me at the end of the day, no, the world functions as a system, where there is pull and push but at the end a ravine, stuck and unstuck out of time, the perception, from the highest points and the lowest, girls, men, women, things, animals, eating up their own souls for the cold dip into the lake, we try our best to communicate, but voices are chordless under ice, we do what we can to make it better, a bit more kindness, just a bit sweeter,


I'd like to
slow down

the right type of distraction, any distraction, conversation, another....interpretation

another book, tell me should should should or hear or hear or feel
another way, another outlook, another ending

my restless bones bound for ******, for mud, for roller coaster, for high, octane fury, some sort of a blazing high lighter fluid disaster, tossed into the fire, and imploded in seconds, check to make sure there are no parents

the principles that brought me thought at one point now churn in uncontrollable dynamic

I'm not sure if there's any going back

at this point...

Of roots, holding on with bitter taste, digging at the back, the sweaty fabric, the itchy pride, what to do, faith is peculiar and it has no bounds, faith is of stories that we tell, and heroes and villains have too much in common. Of roots, of where I came from, to I need to revisit on my brisk days of pleasant ride? while I'm breathing pure air, does the thought need to enter my head, what was? where will I be going? time, of roots, of long marathon, not sprint

Off into the night!!! Praise!  Off! Red lights and helmet!  Yes! Hahsha people here, people there gotta protect the noggin!  Hahhaha riddles are worthless unless sung by masters and picked up by servants!   Bahahah guiness is worthless unless poured slow and downed quick God ******!  Pour more more yes yes god ****** oh battles and craze, crazy night, be my puppy, wait in the car opposite and do what needs to be done!  Take it!  Windowed pup, smash it!

I am the strangest person I have ever met in my life, take the Sybol of the party and put it in my back pocket ironically, looks and desicions, leading to small laughter, leading to pleasent convorsation, leading to anything where anyone can take a breather, take a calm, carry on, hogs roll by then things roll on, the symbols add up, and the symbol of the party seems of a siren, wailing its sorrow, wailing its empty, the empty cab rides, empty expressions l, and entertainment filled with urmmmph and love and drunk, the atmosphere rising, the lovers wanting to clutch closer, the evening never closing, dance a little bit more!   Loan out an extra!  It's sullen but it's sudden!  The spontenaity is flawless, beating the next pack, beating the next maker, making their mark, beating them like eggs whipped with cilantro, you're gone bro, psssssss its possum


In the street!  Sitar!!!

The different factions spreading, interacting, substantive stories vs news stories, elements of truth. That go behind the lines, turning through the streets, jerking around the wifi signals, you're in deep, the picture and the humor, sarcasm seeping into the minds, sexting the pope, letting him know, Jesus walks the earth again, documentaries replacing the text, it's combustion in a little tube, an extension, Realism somewhere distant in our heads, a dream of universalism we all woke up from, wanting to buy into the sensuality of modernity, all encompassing, petty glances from older strangers as we peer into our windows, flying miles away, the creative force of the nihilists who find God in escape

Regeneration-

In a perpetual state of educations, flaring neuron, confused and neglected, the Chemical reactions, the think tank, silence in the face of music, the life game with a set number of rules, the odd numbers muliply, divide, in my case the ones with the rancid breath who club to the other and make the third stay in debt

Wait for it. Our brilliant extinction, we've figured something out, and expand, go forth, take it, cherish and entitlement to dignity, however never superiority, virtue is present in every hedonist, and every holy man has a hard appentige that is ready to burst, re fluidity of philosophers and the hypo **** of artists, reaching out for truth and finding death, artists seeking out death and finding love and bursting with the stars, the relative dignities am take hold and we decide and the breaking point, between defeat, surrender and the possibilities, the senses being able to detect the grass growing, our ears finding the correlations of melodies but sifting and uniqueness comes through and always shines, we are careful of black and white thinkjng but then suddenly the truth is illuminated, we must bust our chains! Take what is ours!  And history will recycle, to hell with libear progression, let our ecosystems battle and let gray area be black and white, our brilliant departure from where we started, born with eyes wide open, without limitation

You can see the sadness in people's eyes, they feel sorry, or they are fidgeting in their seats, they made an attempt to figure something out, but then the truth ate them up, they listened a few times but then got pushed onto their backs

The children in their Jewish curls and dresses, and their mothers reciting prayers, they will know a world that is always...always... inside


Sadness in the eyes, and eagerness in the children, happy for snacks. To write. Do I have a responsibility to them?  What does that even mean?

Stopping myself from thinking what I'm thinking, Jesus believe me, I would have it any other way

What does it mean to surrender? To have more clarity?  To let go?  To see music, and to rekindle eagerness and curiousity, what else is worth living for?  Only questions, no poetry

On the one hand, this, on the other, that
Too much

How are we going to do it?

Exploit our experiences, take bits and peices

Refreshing the senses, I know why your are after, sexuality is all around me, and you absorbed into your own measures but yo know better, it's deafetest language and yet you ofollow along, it's numb and it's nice and it's meant for every human to experience, take it up with your nearest farmer, he'll cultivate your next ufeas, blossoming into ale thing that you don't understand but is growing at a rapid rate, you have control and then you have none, you just watch to build up the bride to blow it all up, going on a grind bewat that suggests I am in a skin that is separate from my own, I want to take some sort of way away from mused, but it seems like I am forced to I this responsibility? Do you read enough to make a judgement, just Jen your thoughts your theory would hold up? They fall between the cracks, you don't care much about anthro by about conveying this to as many as possible, they want to keep you in the right directions l, however the efforts are scarce, you are left in a huge surround led by turrets, and they fire and raipdi rates and you choose to duck for cover

required a son, required some sort of new kind of free wheeling master claws, with antennae sticking out of his head, he's a neaucesence, throw him in with the others, in a few weeks he'll be dead, the silence growing in a  room of hostilities, boaring, raging, clawing, a man in a his ***** wife beater bathing in some sort of maniacal driving, there is surplus, there is some, but there is still the baby crying, the unsettling warm weather bringing these people closer to dying, required a son, some sort of new kind of free wheeling master, there are some things that aren't written down in textbooks that bring some sort of new energies, that make the water flow with just a bit more elegance, there are some energies that take up an entire day, that we flow through but are just never aware of, they roll on and roll on and roll on, but then again, the hot and sweaty day, the new son, being born, water coating his new skin, water in his new eyes, rise

Power, in the prejudice of language
A pronounced but silent linguistic statement
Unspoken but sung on
Pictures paint a thousand words
But then the words carry weight like wagons, trancends all image all together, never better, sleek like leather, loaded questions, how's the weather convorsations spoken in our bodies posture fluid and malleable
Just like water

what I'm trying to say is, you are in deep, its getting close to whatever was your ending, you're not the person you thought you were, take yourself closer to god, take yourself closer to shaking rock, rattling at your feet, the exact anwer, I'm presenting it to you, and it isn't pretty, your armies are rowing away from you, you sea sick *******, try to make some connections, try to make the hollies folly, the desperate hands that claw out for you have nothing better to do but to sit and wait at your doorstep, you have nothing to fear yet, you crave a bit of comfort, the warmth, the deep breaths, the p


nothing nothing notthing

to have one, and to have it project ut with a climactic answer, ready fret the next one, sweating out the future, leading to a corruptible past, finishing last, those heavy concrete jungle stinging bleachers, sticking to your skin, sweating out the pores, my answer for tonight is still more questions,

makes his way down the street, doing just fine, carrying himself around, without a sense of purpose, like gumbi, like jello, just a minstrel, plays the key here here for this this and the key there there for that that, unpopular, unimpressed, dealing with that, dealing with that, senses of inadequacy, where is that stemming from?  why don't I feel powerful enough?  and at what point would I reach enough power to be satisfied?

dawness, dawn, cracking the time, cracking the rules, hearing them again again aagian, once or twice once or twice, to have them implanted on your feet but to still **** them up, to **** them up on purpose....that is the key...

watch videos of me performing poetry

https://plus.google.com/u/0/115356065360543474720/posts

conflit here and there between speakers and non speakers, miscommunications, over matters that do not really matter, the popcorn kettles pop and the dry salt is tasted on the tounge, in the meantime words fly and they fall flat between the cold concrete, the cold, house, the cold glass of water at the hand, attempting to keep moving,

then silence, song, approval

and read it at open mics

thank you

I will pay you in thank yous

no dice to roll, got some sort of fiery hand in nowhere vegas land, what, why, women with greyed hairs in jumpsuits and stale cigarettes, no dice to roll no dice to roll, what am i going to do?  whatever tickles my fancy?  Can't seem to stop writing, it feels like some sort of disease, I'm reserved then cautious and not sure what the next thing to churn out is, I am freaked out, humble, and making my way over to the next table, attempting to make some sort of sense, but the atmosphere of the room is nonsense, dressed for some kind of hawaiin getaway, the theme is even less formal, of those who do not consider fashion, where am I headed?  never be aware of the person, what did I mean when I say that?  I don't know what I am talking about sometimes, am I talking to nobody?  can nobody hear me?  I feel so intensely this draw towards

nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing nothing!

YOU IDIOT!!! you're just going in circles, and a part of you wants to believe halloween logic is actually truee

God ******, I don't know what to do with myself

but I don't know what

still out with the mysteries, wondering, planning, thinking about what to do next, I get to the open mic and I'm the last on the waiting list, and I don't get to perform, but I get a slot at 7:40 next Monday, so I'm going to give it my best shot, I want to be really under the radar, the people at red rock are all artists thinking about work, its a cafe, people go there to help themselves think, or to relax, quiet and intense is good, that is what I'm going to go for

what do you want from me?  get away!  you're pulling at my jeans, you're a little haze over my head, my hat won't fit!  won't you quit?  what?  what do you expect?  you want birth?  you want a new religion?  leave me to my porch, leave me to my peace, I get enough flak this and that this and that, I would like some solidarity, it would be a pleasure for me, blah blah yaddiddy yaw, you spinal tap!  you nervous sack!  you severing suffering sap!  sit down and take a nap you boil!  you pusstuous pimple ready to burst!  pick up a stick and pop it and have it be done with! you nothing, you *****!  ****, ****!

for a few nice gestures, thank you for mornings, thank you for that, for declarations that are genuine, for gatherings, for gatherings, we all want to live harmoniously, yes,  yes yes, thank you for embrace, thank you for cries, deep penetrating expelling cries, thank you for surrender, family, love, family, pick me up where my pieces fall, I am forever grateful

I'll let them feast on my body
but until then I'm a godddamn vessel, there aint no stopping t he SKRAT

he's teething, a mice rodent, liking the thick cheese, and he's got a belly that never ACHES,

The SKRAT will scratch!!!

only so many ******* days to say what it is, that I wanted to SAY!!!

SKRATS don't breath, they teeth, and they scurry from burrow to burrow

dodging looks, dodging gifts1!+!!!!

seal a deal?

take my spin, take the wheel?

a dart of the bass knows the tones

won't a kiss?  

take that, take off the peel?

COME HOME, COME HOME!!!
LETS MAKE THIS THIS THIS

You're too far away, bring it back
I a scattered little tom waits boy, with my goofy hat, and I can't sit straight!  call call  call!!

OHH boy, I'm in trouble,

I'm such a little SPAZZZZZ OH NO ITS ALL COMING BACK, CIGARS AND **** A DRAGGGGG AFARRRRRRRR

PIRATE LOGIC, HALLOWEEN LOGIC EATING UP MY BRAIN

BANGING ON THE TABLE

frazzled, what?  body in motion, can't quite find the right, what is that you said?  stumbling all over the house, what to wear, throw something on, throw on leather, to match you little pers-on-ality

write the feathers, whatever it takes, stimulation, the porch, banging my head against the door, WHAT!!! try try try! or don't try at all?  don't look out?  I'd like a few ******* answers,

Signed,
Muskrat

you are trying every day to live more authentically

I forgive you for the mistakes you make, and I forgive you for showing weaknesses to the people you love

I forgive you for some of the bad things you do.

Life is short, and painful, and you are trying your best

Progress, not perfection


also, one more thing.  Lighten up man, play some stupid music and act  like an idiot, I'm tired of writing poetry, act like a stupid fool then go to sleep

In the eyes of whom exactly?  In the eyes of the state? the state has many facets, the state functions with people who have lives, of humanity, of work days, of cups of coffee, of politics, of lack of movement, of diplomacy, of sweaty, of pushing and pulling, of treaties and binding treaties and the difference between the two, of norms?  of what kind of norms? and who enforces those norms?  and who is hungry

Rights?  In the eyes of god?  Whose god?  the god, a god, one god, many, more, more coming, one has already arrived?  all is well, all is hell, of the spirit?  of the mind?  rights in the eyes of the conscious? what's for breakfast today?  can't remember, rights in the eyes of ethics?  work ethics?  agreements? harmony?  whose harmony? and who decides?  with democracy?

ha, rights

Watch me perform rights on youtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laoAZpn84rg&feature;=youtu.be

yes

Or am I socrates?  do I play socrates with myself?   is socrates a genuine soul or a total *******?  would I win an argument,  I am fascinated to make his aquantence over beer, where he may stare into space for awhile before asking a question, and that question is a question, and I pause, with nothing to say back, would we just go on like this?  asking arbitrary questions until one of us got drunk enough to leave?  I wonder

all these little things make sense in certain situations, but the intuition is the most deceiving thing of a lll, its completely in conflict with reason, but somehow the two connect and create  a though, nakedness, crossroads, a little thought, someone somewhere sees it, believes in it, calls for it, speaks, and, champagne glasses, toast, on, a moment, what for?

to understand, and to know when to protect, the greatest challenge

For the birds

I hear you

a very particular twinkle, in the throat, up through the tongue

the chirp at the rooftops, in an atmpophere, for whatever reason, we're not sure,
for mating?  for...soul?  there are many songs I know

you stop for the silence, the beat is the wind, and you float with it, I hear the surround support, the bass in the fibre, the placement, surrounding the gates, the water fountain isn't working, it listens as well, it is rusting

for the birds, I hear your words

Please help me stand ground

please let me know the difference between my enemies and my closest friends

I cannot tell, god, jesus, I, one, take the wheel

I am but human, too human

please

whisper, whisper to me, put water on my lips, my arms rest off the side, stroke my hair, my stomach on the hard wood, a kiss on the cheek, a bit of kindness, a story of new lessons, give that to me, know which direction we are heading, with the small flashlight at the bow, flinch it every half an hour to keep the batteries functioning, wind it up if anyone gets a second wind, without coffee, with coffee, bobbing up and down, stroke my hair again, gently, whisper an L, whisper a synth, a simple, take my side, the water is cool, the cave is dark, the flashlight will work, I crank, I crank

my arms and legs, motionless, extended, floating, ahhh, with friends, in a canoe, rowing rowing rowing, the noises coming from everywhere, eventually upstream, moonbeams, the silences filled with the occasional boom boom, the jealousies, jealousies eating up my insides, but still my head extends out like branches, folding in with one another, thick and matted with bark, with birth, tattling over the spokes with claws, breathing and dipping into a pool that is freezing, let me start with something new, with a machete, cut the twigs that are dying, I collapse a vessel, stuck out of time, reaching for the next high, churning in my gut, home made ice cream, too thick to ingest, too light to cut

don't let your body, don't let it be someplace where I can't see

I'd like to protect, and yet my being is so sensitive to you

a selfish longing, of possession, of unhealthy aggressive intense lust, of covered, cover cover cover

bounce back and I'm useless, a rag, hiding with eyes wide open, facing towards the sun, the rays break through my shades, something I'll never know, be able to face, I am a dream, a fantasy, drawn with long legs, lost over extending nature

protect me, don't falsify me, deceive me,

to love the world and to know that love makes mistakes, love is the soup, and the alphabet doesn't emerge correctly, soggy

fragile, and luke warm, blood temperature, curdling, madness

toss it in the microwave

or walk away

the types of tippers, tipping for different reasons

for the social, for some sort of status, for exaggerated surplus, for crusty dollar bills that are meaningless in one wallet but then meaningful in another

of a street performer, to place a dollar in his case, cause his taste is somewhat reflective of the atmosphere in the street, and she has a pretty smile on her face

to tip, because you don't know what tomorrow will bring, because the money you have will be meaningless on your death bed

to tip to be closer to One, to be closer to I, closer to Christ, to Allah, to be closer to right

to tip, to give with the hope of one day being able to take with understanding, belief in karma can be relaxing

to tip, because of the moment, to keep things moving, you saw someone at the end of the bar and its in your best interest to invest

to tip, to tip for kind service, to tip for pleasantries, for smiles and anecdote, relatability, a small investment for lea sure, and still that is soft

to tip?  or not to tip, because belief is a *****

to not tip on principle, and to feel better that way, pay more for the donut, to start the day

to tip out of judgement, out of taste, one service was better than another, a standard, and a tip is an extra, a cherry for balance, a system in which you believe in

to tip the man who parks your car because out of fear that he will take it joyously far


to tip, to take, to put penny in jar, for charity, for good company.  to tip

fascinates me

songs, senses pleasing themselves, beat, of silence, song, of *******, of lubrication, beat, of the time in a shift in conversation, expression, in the birds, who do it instinctually, to people, who do it as sponges, yes.  we are all spongbob, hurting and dancing and blowing bubbles, ready, ready, ready