Giving more
than a drunken 'hey'
is hard to manage
in this day and age.
Even a woman like me
wants more than that.
No ***** calls
is a bit of a stretch.
Pet my head,
tell me I'm pretty,
ask me to sleep in your bed.
I'll still be that girl
you text for ***
at 2 AM.

Was I in love with you when I shoved my tongue down another person’s throat?

This question I’m asked, on the spot, left with my thoughts, sift through and find the truth. Four months in, there I was, grinding on a stranger, staring at your jealous texts while someone else’s junk was rubbing up against me. Guilt so tough I wanted to puke. Promising and failing to never hurt you again. Some secrets are better left unsaid.

Officer, please, I was in love. Why wouldn’t I be?

I failed the sobriety test?
Of course: No choice but to feel the worst. A liar gets in too deep.

I’ll take the plea bargain;
One lie for you. One lie for me.

Loneliness comes in many forms.
For me, it's a raging stream,
trying to pull me underneath.
It's a pillow I sleep with
that suffocates my lungs.
It's the sound of laughter
filling the room while I stand outside the door.
It's a devil on my shoulder, daring me
to cry some more.
It's a weight pressing on my chest
And no one is there to save me.
It's staring at the empty bed
and wondering when
someone will fill the space again.

and in the year of the Dragon
I kissed a forehead with lips of nothing but love
the kind that hurt, shoved heat
through my mouth and down his throat,
burned our souls from the inside out

and in the year of the Horse
the flame died out

Never had it. The  peach skin of an early morning move-in. Freshmen, fresh faces, awkwardly sharing smiles with those in the same boat.
Wondering what college will hold.
I have been stunted by the changing of the guards, never a need for an open heart.
Too many different places and not enough to settle down.
Never a chance to feel the feeling.
Regrets or not. I can't do much.