Is this world reality
Or is it just a dream
If so I’d like to wake up
Though it doesn’t seem to end

Upon the end of this dream
On waking from this life
Will I remember my mistakes
And minimise the strife

I see the man that wanders
Each day a different place
I also see the people
With that look upon their face
Horror, discust and pity
The look conveys them all
Of wonder at the question
How far did this man fall?

They do not know the hardship
None of the pain or strife
That this man has endured
Throughout his tortured life
Of where he’s been or what he’s done
He pays a heavy price
In his mind he’s not worthy
To be in a happy home
So he wanders place to place
Forever all alone

Deep despair
A gasp for air
Tears flow
A pit does grow

A mask of smiles
A life of lies
So much laughter
Silence after

Memories abound
Mind spins all around
Only one wish
End this anguish

These 4 walls
Have no windows or doors
Yet I pound and I pound
With hope


Of escaping

Things I’ve seen things I’ve done
Should be in the minds of no one
In the name of keeping peace
Shots fired lives in pieces
Families torn apart hearts rendered
With all lives by my hand ended
Seeing them in my mind eye
Awake asleep can’t say goodbye
To voice emotions is so tough
Sorry isn’t good enough

In the dead and blowing leaves
The rain and wind aplenty
Autumn brings the long coat sleeves
And leaves the branches empty

The days are shorter. Dull and grey
The clouds all gather
Bringing rain
The ties to summer severed

Autumn brings the vivid colours
Reds and yellows
Trees all covered
Till they drop onto the ground
Piling in drifts all around

Walking with our hats and gloves
All wrapped up as if in hugs
With the people that we love
Kicking leaves from empty boughs
A time of love and laughter

Sitting sipping watching
With one eye on door
Waiting for old comrades
He knows he’ll see once more
Those left upon the battlefield
Fighting by his side
The men he toasts a drink to
With a tear in his eye
He’ll tell you all his stories
To keep his mates alive
And how it is his honour
That they helped him survive
So if you see a veteran
Sit with him for a while
Listen to his wisdom
And keep his memories alive

I wished a wish
That wish was you
And then in time
That wish came true
For in that wish
Your love I knew
As mine for ever
Me and you

Life is change
The seasons
The years
All you can do
Is change with them
Lives are taken
New lives are created
Mourning, rejoicing
An eternal conflict
That brings us all
To the inevitable

Where the brave soldiers
Out on the field
Fighting the battle
Never to yield
Love for their country
Brothers in arms
Telling their stories
Spinning their yarns
Do not forget them
For they gave their all
To give you your freedom
For that they did fall

I see their faces, crying
Though I’ll never know their names
Those images of heartbreak
Seared into my brain

They never had a chance to live
Before their innocence was taken
Casualties of conflict
Never knowing any peace

Waiting for the guns and bombs
To wipe out their families
Leaving them homeless
Living on the streets

After seeing with my own two eyes
The lives that they endure
My heart breaks every day
For all the children of war

Could I be death
Ushering souls
From this life to the next

Could I be justice
Handing rewards
To those that are deserving

Could I be strength
Propping up
Those that need to be lifted

Could I give life
Knowing how much
Hardship and suffering are in this world

If god is our father
Why won’t he answer
Does he just not care
He leaves us to choose
But offers no guidance
Just leaves us to blindly flounder
He takes us all eventually
But offers no solice
Just an eternity in paradise
To wonder if our lives
Were ever worth living at all

The demons are real
They whisper to me
The monsters are here
Don’t try to flee
I try not listen
To block out the noise
To keep my composure
And act with good poise
But every so often
Just now and then
I might hear whisper
That does make some sense
Then ever so slightly the mask gives a slip
The madness exposed
My sanity stripped
Just for a moment the monsters are free
Until I I can cage them
And return to be me

Do not cry
For those that die
Don’t forget
You’re still alive
Now it’s time
To live your life
And honour those
That came before

The way was paved
By those that lived
And looked ahead
Not back in lament
So live for tomorrow
Not in the past
Though keep your memories
So they can last

See the enemies approaching
Closing in from every side
Wake up screaming I was dreaming
They dissipate with open eyes
They were real not a figment
Only from time left behind

They were people we were fighting
Flesh and blood like you and me
Scared of dying
Dodging bullets as they run across the field
Bodies falling voices crying
Wishing nothing else but peace

After seeing all the carnage of a ****** battlefield
Can you ever be the person you once were
Or will you yield
To the voices you are hearing in your never ending dreams
Take the pain away
Just **** me
Will the anguish ever cease

Through the velvet softness
They silently creep
Into my mind
When I’m sound asleep
The alternative real
Of vivid dreams
So full of laughter,
Or tremendous screams
Maybe they’re happy
So full of joy
But also they can
Leave you wholly annoyed
However you get them
Whenever they come
Accept them all freely
Good or bad, every one

Looking in the mirror
I see the man I am
Not perfect but surviving
Doing everything I can
To provide for my family
Give them everything they need
Hoping with my being
That they see my tiresome deeds
I wish to put my feet up
To finish with my work
But I know my family needs me
And for that I’ll never shirk

Let the darkness take me
Sweet numb oblivion
Imageless blackness
To **** my mind away

Let the sleep of ages envelope me
Wrap me in its emptiness
Noiseless and inviting
Surrounding Me in beautiful silence

Let my memories leave me
Never to resurface
Leaving peace inside me
My broken mind relieved

Let the world forgive me
Take this heavy burden
Give me a sign there is hope
To rest my mind completely

The words that come are useless
They just cannot convey
The passion and the meaning
Of what I want to say

I get so **** frustrated
At the feelings locked inside
That have no way of escaping
And flying far and wide

I don’t show much emotion
And wish that I could change
To tell the ones I love
What’s really on my mind

When the curtain falls
Can you say
I did my best I gave my all
When your numbers up
Did you live
Or just hide from every mishap

Will you be proud
To tell your loved ones
The life you you led was full
Or tell them
All you did was hide afraid of everything

So live the life you’re given
Do the things you enjoy
Don’t be afraid of happiness
Cause in the end
We all know that we are going to die

From the moment that I met you
You stole my heart away
It’s you I want to wake to
Each and every day
I will be complete when you’re my wife
Forever you are mine
Together we created life
Our futures looking fine

The emptiness of loss
Is a void never filled
Losing a loved one
That can never be replaced
The pain of grief
Felt so acutely
Missing the person suddenly gone

Leaving behind
A family that loves you
Hopelessly wanting
To hold you again
To feel your arms around us
Giving love and comfort
Never to be felt once more

This is a story
That needs to be told
Of the men and the women
For whom the bell tolls
They fought to the last
‘Gainst our numerous foes
The names no longer
Called on nominal rolls
Are our brothers and sisters
For whom the bell tolls

I’d give you the world
If it was mine to give
Hand you my life
For you live
Grant every wish
If it was in my power
Stay by your side every minute and hour
Without hesitation
I give you my heart
Endure the suffering
When we are apart

People come and people go
Though friendship is forever
Those special people in your life
Are in your mind whatever
We may lose them physically
But never from our minds
As long as you have memories
Their souls will stay alive

Last night of the year
And out in the pub
I spied in the corner
A man on his todd

So I went and I asked
If I could sit with him
And he returned with
He was patiently waiting

For all of his brothers
Each of his comrades
To return from their duties
To drink and make merry

Each year along
the fewer arriving
Till this year alone
The glass he was raising

So I sat and I drank
With an old weary soldier
And listened intently
To the stories he told me

When the night ended
With smiles and with tears
I wished him farewell
And a happy new year

A new year a new me
The mantra of the masses
But people rarely ever change
Unless it really matters
So let’s have a real new year
Don’t set the silly goals
Just pledge to do the best you can
And keep a happy home

Hello pain my old friend
Take time to heal they said
But even with time
You never left

The pills they supplied
Gave relief for a while
Until you returned
You couldn’t say goodbye

We embrace each day
To the mirror I say
I’ll get through it I’m strong
Always hoping I’m not wrong

Pain you make me sit and weep
Sometimes I can’t stay on my feet
The tears fall free
Won’t you please let me be

One day I will be free of pain
My friend you won’t come back again
I pray that day I soon will see
That you will have the heart to leave

Our time is limited
To walk along our path
Onwards to the future
Unable to change what’s past
We give to our children
The knowledge that is ours
With hope that our legacy
Will light their darkest hours
We hope to give them wisdom
To build a better world
Though really all we can do
Is watch for what unfurls

How deep does the pain go
Let’s cut down and see
Watch how much the the blood flows
Like life out of me

How long will the tears flow
Will they ever run dry
I am so surprised
That I can still cry

How far does my love get
Does it reach to your heart
Mine breaks every moment
That we spend apart

What age will my life end
I hope long from now
To watch my kids grow up
And make me so proud

How long can I resist them
How long can I ignore
What timeframe do I have
Until I just can take no more

How long before my mind breaks
How long until they win
Till I no longer feel strong
And let the demons in

How long until I fracture
How long till I’m not me
Until I let my guard down
And set the monsters free

The whispers getting louder
Needing to be heard
Waiting till my walls are gone
Wanting into this world

How many voices in my head
You are not worthy one has said
Another just wants to be dead
I listen not to these

One says that no one is like me
That’s just because I’m crazy
I’m trapped in here never to be free
I listen not to he

Another says he is a friend
But whispers to me it’s the end
No more he thinks my life should wend
I listen not to him

But in the clamour and the buzz
I here a voice that says I’m loved
I think it comes from heaven above
To that I have to listen

My struggle happens day to day
For love is why I kneel and pray
That’s why I know I’ll be okay
I listen just to me

We are all different
None the same
So who are we
To judge insane
To see the world
Through different eyes
The things you’d see
Such sweet surprise
Describe a colour
With my senses
Feel freedom from
Enclosing fences
Built by peers
Sane and normal
Doctors probing
Pills and potions

Multitudes of galaxies
Floating in the unseen universe
Hidden by the pinpoints
Of lights from the cities
Insignificant through infinite time
We wander along our minuscule lives
Gone so quickly into nothing but memory
Nothing but names forgotten to history

Sitting silent
Watching, hoping,
Asking, wishing,
Begging to be noticed
Wanting to be helped
But knowing ignorance
Of the situation
Of destitution
That falls upon
The unfortunate
Invisible

I smile to hide the pain away
I laugh to hide the sorrow
I lie awake in bed at night
Fearing tomorrow
Another day of hiding
The way I feel inside
Putting on the mask again
So others think I’m fine
I know I’m not alone at all
I have my family
But no one knows how hard it is
To show my anxieties
So I smile to hide the pain away
And no one wants to see

Why am I isolated
Why does my voice
Die in my throat
Before I can explain
Why I feel so down

Why can I not convey
The hurt, anger, pain
I keep it inside
Only to hurt my loved ones
Not because I wish it

Why must I push
Everybody to a distance
Thinking it will save me
But only isolating me
Further from my family

I wonder where we’re going
Our destination, target
What happens when get there
Will we be well met
Our loved ones gone before us
Waiting at the end
To reunite and reminisce
To hold us once again

If you think that man is weak
Look at his life
Take just a peek
The freedom that you have today
Comes not without a price to pay
He volunteered to keep you safe
And that he did in that he gave
He lost his friends and brothers too
Not for himself but all for you
And on return asks not for praise
But for respect to those been slain
That gave it all in selfless acts
With no regrets on looking back
So if you see that soldier weep
Know that it’s not because he’s weak
It’s all for that great price he’s paid
Of friends and brothers all been lain

Age is just a number
Or so they say to us
Yet age has its restrictions
And who decides what must
Be done or not at sixteen
Eighteen twenty one
If age is just a number
Can we not make our own minds up

When life is pink and fluffy
And it's clear in the sky
The voices are all silent
They say nothing to my mind

When there's a cloud that's noticed
And it looks a chance of rain
The voices start complaining
They explode inside my brain

I don't want any problems
I just want an easy life
Just let me plod along my path
I don't want any strife

My life is full of hardships
Like everybody else
It has no rhyme or reason
Nor does it make sense

So do not worry daily
Take your life just as it is
The strife and trouble happens
Solve the problems as they come

My body is broken
My mind is a mess
But my life is adventure
I must confess
I married a beauty
The love of my life
We had our children
That fill me with pride
I became a soldier
Travelled the world
And now I look forward
To adventure and more

One, two, three, four,
We all have them
Count once more
Two arms, legs,
Hands, feet,
So we can run, wave, greet
Not all are lucky
Some have one lost
Or even two or three
Lost in war
Born with a disability
So when you see a limbless person
Don’t look down upon them
Help them if they need
Embrace their stories
See the people

With the loss of a love
That was sent from above
Grief is a hole
That appears in your soul
That can never be filled
No matter your will
To try and replace
The familiar face
That was sent from above
To fill you with love

You will go where you are told
Into places hot or cold
You will as I have said
**** that man make sure he’s dead

You will do as you are ordered
Go forth secure our borders
You will follow toe the line
Invade that country make it mine

I will sit here at my desk
To me there is no consequence
To you though
Search your own conscience

If you refuse
You’ll go to jail
Obey my orders
Live through hell

When you are spent
Another I’ll find
To take my orders
And break his mind

without you time is endless,
my heart yearns for your touch,
as i draw nearer to you,
my love grows oh so much,
to feel your breath upon me,
the warmness of your skin,
to kiss your lips, caress you,
know that you are mine.

Feeling lonely, feeling blue
All because I’m missing you
Wishing to be by your side
In the flesh not in my mind
To touch you would be such sweet pleasure
Something that I’ll always treasure