When will the hurting stop

Never

The loss is raw
The pain is real

When will the pain go

Never

The memories remain
The loss is unbearable

Until

Every day sees something good
The love is remembered
The pain is rendered
To bearable again

With the loss of a love
That was sent from above
Grief is a hole
That appears in your soul
That can never be filled
No matter your will
To try and replace
The familiar face
That was sent from above
To fill you with love

Life is change
The seasons
The years
All you can do
Is change with them
Lives are taken
New lives are created
Mourning, rejoicing
An eternal conflict
That brings us all
To the inevitable

The emptiness of loss
Is a void never filled
Losing a loved one
That can never be replaced
The pain of grief
Felt so acutely
Missing the person suddenly gone

Leaving behind
A family that loves you
Hopelessly wanting
To hold you again
To feel your arms around us
Giving love and comfort
Never to be felt once more

you say mental illness is a big deal until
i am sitting surrounded by trash in my car because its the only place i feel safe
until
i am crying when i wake up because i don't want to wake up
until
i am searching through pictures trying to find a scrap of light
until
i am sitting on the bathroom floor drinking the half empty beer i found in the recycling
until
i get attached to the drawings on my legs and cry when they go away
until
my plants all die because i cant water them
until
my pets die because i cant feed them
until
i starve myself on accident
until
my room has to be heavy or i cant breathe
until
i block everyone on my contacts list because i feel like they are watching me
until
i cant run anymore
until
i cant walk anymore
until
there is nothing left but you still want more

A new year a new me
The mantra of the masses
But people rarely ever change
Unless it really matters
So let’s have a real new year
Don’t set the silly goals
Just pledge to do the best you can
And keep a happy home

Looking in the mirror
I see the man I am
Not perfect but surviving
Doing everything I can
To provide for my family
Give them everything they need
Hoping with my being
That they see my tiresome deeds
I wish to put my feet up
To finish with my work
But I know my family needs me
And for that I’ll never shirk