I hurt
Every time you tell me to smile
Because you act as if it’s just so easy

Easier said than done

I sink
Every time you tell me to be happy
Because you act as if I have nothing to be sad about

Easier said than done

I drown
Every time you tell me to think positive
Because you act as if positive will make the bad stuff disappear

Easier said than done

I break
Every time you tell me to cheer up
Because you act as if I should be happy for everyone else’s sake

Easier said than done

I know you feel uncomfortable
Every time I let my fake smile falter
And every time I don’t seem happy
Or every time I can’t think positively
And every time I tint the happy mood

You’re so used to me faking it
That you thought it was real
And when I finally let my mask drop
Because it’s just too much work at the moment
You think telling me to be happy will help
You want me to stop making you uncomfortable
But sometimes it’s just
Easier said than done

If life were a musical
I’d sing all day and night
But I don’t sing all that well

If life were a dance competition
I’d dance all day and night
But I don’t dance all that well

If life were a play
I’d act all day and night
But I don’t act all that well

When am I going to step out of my shell?
When will I stop caring about my imperfections?
When will I remember that life is just life?

When will I allow myself to be less than the best?

It changes quite often
Her opinion
And I sit through every story
That made her choose this one
All the things that were different than the last
Like ice cream
Or cupcakes
The favorite changes quite often
I think my sister is boy crazed

A rock star and a bookworm
Don’t match
An extrovert and an introvert
Don’t match
A loved and an unnoticed
Don’t match

But somehow
You and me
Do

Perfection is the worst
Yet I want it so bad
So everyone will leave me alone.

Perfection is the worst
Because it doesn’t even exist
But it’s still expected of me.

Perfection is the worst
Trapping me in forms
Locking my joints in place.

Perfection is the worst.

Sixteen is safe.
1...2...3...4…5...6...7...8...9...10...11...12...13...14...­15...16
Count to sixteen
To simply refresh.

Sixteen is safe.
1...2...3...4…5...6...7...8...9...10...11...12...13...14...­15...16
Count to sixteen, sixteen times in a row
To calm down.

Sixteen is safe.
1...2...3...4…5...6...7...8...9...10...11...12...13...14...­15...16
Count to sixteen, sixteen times in a row, sixteen times a day
To stay sane.

Six is wrong.
1...2...3...4…5...6...7...8...9...10...11...12...13...14..­.15...16
Six is dangerous.
Don’t interrupt at six.

Sixteen is safe.
1...2...3...4…5...6...7...8...9...10...11...12...13...14...­15...16
I restart everyday.
First one when I wake up.

1...2...3...4…5...6...7...8...9...10...11...12...13...14...1­5...16

The page is still blank
I can’t think of words
I can’t put my feelings out there
This God awful white
Needs to be painted
But I can’t find the right color.