Concealed by disregard.
Informal obligations of stagnant occurrences.
Intelligence of no use, no form, no will to inform.
Disastrous conclusions, assumptions, judgements.
Sleeping and sleepless.
Longing for more.
Yet, the will has been killed.

Lying wide awake, questioning the defences I hold onto like a loose thread of potent forces.
Exacted to not be exact.
The mind is busy, the body is not.
The soul is in hibernation, the eyes flicker and flip like a thousand broken light bulbs.
I intend on not grabbing, not fighting, and not limiting.
Limitless in a world of limited.
How do I get out?

Tell me, if I were to die today, slowly...
What would you do?
If I told you of the constant pain and loneliness I feel inside everyday, quivering in emptiness...
What would you do?

Intrinsic worth; the curse of my hardened shadow.
I am sick, a chronic illness that can't seem to be cured.
Tired, in pain.
I can't move my body, my mind of distorted abyss.
My visions are blank.
Ask what I really want in this cold world...
Someone to love.
Someone to hold.
Someone who understands.
Someone who's told; told a million stories of how they once shattered, and came to life.
Someone to bring me to life.

Intricately designed for me and only me.
A soul and a mind of those dared to explore, only to be pushed down and frightened.
Intrinsic worth, move slow.
Stop me when I am low.
Death is around my corner.
I can't seem to have anything more.
Tears rolling , a deep black ocean of a ghostly void.
Echoes down the narrow walls...
Hopeless screams...
Detachment is all too real.

Save me.
Show me how deep love can be.
Take me there

Didn't they say, a love like that won't last.
Didn't I tell you, a love like that will break.
Didn't I give enough.
Maybe my devotion is too strong.
My love is too strong, deep, loyal, and bonded like a metal carving glued with a flaming gun.
Unbreakable, passion evoked but not worthy of anyone to have.
Wasteful and undeserving of such wander, intensity, mystery, intelligence.
Sensual honey dripping of red velvet cake.
Waiting to be eaten, pleasure is indulgence of the finest scents and taste.
Yet, I cry in my corner.
Too strong to have, too strong to hold.
Will they ever be enough.
A white silk curtain drapes like the red satin dress on my curvaceous body.
Waiting to be taken... Gently destroyed.
Like chocolate lava waiting to be dripped on your delicious skin.
I see you before you see me.
I stay grounded yet proactive in my pursuits.
I don't do anything...
I just work, listen to music, and write hopeless poetry on rants about my depression.
Nothing to lose, nothing to gain.
Are they good enough for me.
Or am I destined to only be with me.
Pure love, yet impure.
She's sweet, but will cut you like a razored knife...
Much like a Scorpio, you shouldn't **** with us.
Marry me, if only you are worth my privacy

What about those times I cried and bled for help.
What about those times I tirelessly picked myself up only to get burned down again.
What about those times I gave everything and got nothing back.
What about those times they called me crazy out of spite and jealousy.
All those times of abuse, telling me I am wrong, and I should change.
All those times when I begged for love, and to stop hurting.
All those times and sleepless nights I suffered and destroyed myself in agony.
All those times they put the blame on me.
All those times they spat on me and called me names.
For all those years they bullied me.
For all the pain I was forced to endure.
All those times I said sorry for doing nothing wrong.
All those times I had to be the bigger person.
All those times I got beaten.
Everything I went through, alone.
I had no one, and still stand strong until today.
THE ONLY PERSON YOU EVER NEED IS YOURSELF.
TRUST YOURSELF, AND LOVE YOURSELF.
DON'T LET THEM GET YOU WEAK.
NEVER BACK DOWN.
FIGHT THIS BATTLE FOR  YOUR LIFE.
YOU DESERVE IT.
DO IT BY YOURSELF, THATS THE ONLY PERSON YOU HAVE AT THE END OF THE DAY

My soul is trapped.
My ghost is lurking, floating like a lost cause.
A curse only I know, a curse that destroys every minute of my waking life.
I have yet nothing more to do, to become, to complete.
I am cold, shattered glass withered into the dark abyss where the lonely serpent sleeps.
Eternity has no name for the darkest of times I recall as to what I have lived.
Living an immortal life, I want to be gone.
I want nothing in a human form.
The night sky energizes me.
I gaze upon and dance crudely.
The airy breeze in the dark wind.
Like the spirits wavering around floating with me.
I see nothing but the darkness it all brings.
As black as night, as black as death.
She works in the shadows, haunts you as you do her.
Sees you and watches you.
If you onto her, she's way onto you.
Her presence of hopeless sad cries.
A lonely star, of death and cold air
A black heart, wild and can't be tamed.
She's screams, in silence.
Nightmares lurking beneath.
You see me, but I don't see me.
I don't know me.
An energy of dark forces, working with the ones who bring agony to life.
Frozen inside, without a trace, without a fortude of light.
I have become my worst nightmare.
The goddess of death.
Paint it black, as black as the night, as black as death.

Lost
Lonely
Angry
Bored
Depressed
Not myself
Deprecated
Longing for love
Caved in
Scared
Exhausted
Frustrated
Anxious
Paranoid
Confused

I wish I had someone.
I wish I had you.
I wish I had love.
I wish I had someone who embraced and understood my darkness.
I wish I had someone who saw through it.
I wish I had someone who really cared.
I wish I had someone who wanted to be there.
I wish I had a soul who connects with me spiritually and wants me for more than what I seem.
I wish I had fire in the wind.
I wish I had a voice to speak to.
I wish I had a face that guided me.
I wish I had that person that uplifted me.
I wish I was happy.
I wish I was not alone.
I wish I had my partner in crime.
I wish I had my ride, and my die.
I wish I had you.
This is way over due.