I had an idea
It starts with an 'E'
I had an idea
It was all for me
I had an idea
So bright in my head
Like a Kodak moment 'click'
But now the ideas' dead

I had an idea
And everyone wanted to know
I had an idea
As beautiful as snow
I had an idea
Pretty as can be
I had an idea
And it's all for me

I had an idea
Like music on the wind
I had an idea
Like freedom from sin
I had an idea
As tangible as brick
I had an idea
But now I've lost it

When my bones and joints creak
When my voice can barely leave my throat
When my head aches for hours on end
When I need more and more sleep

When creativity is a chore
When I'm too jaded for the word "love"
When success feels like an if
When fun isn't fun anymore

These are just little reminders
Life's way of warning me
I don't have all the time in the world
Even though I don't know what to reach for

Just those little signs
That whisper, "you're getting older"
Just enough to bring me down
And remember the hands of time.

None of your friends agree
Not a one of them approves
Your parents are disappointed
But what are you to do?

I've sworn up and down
That you are my love, indeed.
I've sealed my lies in blood
Covering the warnings you won't heed.

I'm just the demon in your closet
Follow me little churchboy
I'm the only one who'll ever fit
No matter what I destroy

I've bid you question your faith
When you're down on your knees
And when you next go to pray
You'll only think of me.

Because He will never miss you
When you push past the 'holy' doors.
He won't remember you even existed
Or what you needed him for.

But I need you like air
Like fish need the sea
I need you like Earth needs the sun
I need you to need me.

So come hither, into my grasp
And I'll never release you from me
I'll worship you like the sun
And in your bindings, you shall be free.

I'm ready to leave now
This is the last of the poetry
That'll ever go from me to you
Cuz I'm better than you'll ever be
And now I am through.

I hope it felt good
When you broke me down
Because I've been made anew
And I run this town
And I'm so done with you.

So when you see the poems
I wrote with you in mind
Remember this is the last one
And I'm leaving you behind
It's been (Hell) fun.

Darling, darling
May I hold you in my arms?
And rock you until
You've cried out every injustice
Every done to you?

Darling, darling
Might I endear myself to you?
Until your very instinct is to look to me
For the strength you need
To win every battle?

Darling, darling
Shall I be your diamond sheild?
Impervious to damage
In my complete conviction
To protect you from harm?

                                                                                    But you don't see me, do you?
I am not an option for you.
                                                                                    I won't call you darling any longer.
I am not to be forgotten.

You may never turn around to see me
And I, darl-, I may never care again.

I've held us together
When we're falling apart
With copious amounts of
Duct tape and super glue
I held on tightly
Until my fingers were cramping
But I'm starting to think
It's time to let go

I wrote you some poems
You can find on my page
That explained how I'd never give up
And I know they're all lies
Because in this moment
I wouldn't just let go
I'd push, I'd shove, I'd ****** you from me
This isn't what friendship is like

Your one word answers still hurt
When I pour my heart out to you
And I'm still thinking you don't care
Until you have something to tell
Do you listen to me at all?
It's been six years, but I never asked.
Am I even your best friend?
Or am I your personal punching bag?

I'm tired of you breaking my ideas
Of you raining on my parade
Because if I did the same
I know you'd ignore me for days upon days
So this is me saying "Farewell"
I'm detaching myself from you
I'm not an extension of you anymore
I know know nothing about you.

When all I'm doing is enjoying your presence?
When I can't decide whether I want to hear your voice?
When all I'm doing is taking in your appearance
But, to pursue you, I don't plan on making that choice?

This is my version of a crush, I suppose
Subjecting myself to a beautiful Hell
More than ready to be led by the nose
Breaking off bits of my heart for you to sell

I'm not looking for love in this
Just someone to sympathize
And then I'll wonder why I didn't get you
When I never even tried.