In the torn reentry of something less than perfect
I search for elegant ways to change the circuit
For a time that I imaged was worth it
Still I cannot grasp that concept of endearment
When I was always the one that feared it
In the lost temptations of seconds gone by
I sit by myself and ask the ground why
Too wet to fetch tears that are all too salty
In the end I will see that I was the one who was faulty
Not broken or wrong as in a sad country song
But in the sense of missing a component that belongs
To the puzzle of a heart that often loses its way
On the rainiest of days

"why are you so jumpy?"
because I've always been a part of the guy crowd
the one that physically fights instead of mentally
I have grown up in fear of being hit
because I have always done something wrong
I have never felt safe around you
because I know you would take it out on me
but I am not a punching bag
*I'm your daughter

Drunk on nostalgia,
and longing for the past,
looking at who is still my friend,
and the ones gone too fast,
I miss them all,
but I dont want any of them here,
but then again my courage out weighs my fear,
and I see it all so beautifully clear,
what I would do to hear that smile,
or see that laugh,
feel that giggle,
and dance during math,
to have stories of yet to comes,
and what dreams we have with the future suns,
friends of guys and girls,
sending my world into swirls,
and dancing with the flame,
the band maybe different, but the music is still the same,
we all just have a new name,
that is a representation of the yesterdays,
and I miss the the future and past figuring's of today's faze,
nostalgia is weighing the other half of my couch down,
as it is my friend, my smile and my frown,
I'd push them all away,
if I didnt know they were here to stay,
so I might as well enjoy the ride,
because life is just a rock skipping on a pond,
thrown by a bad hand,
I'll keep saying it along with you,
the next skip is new,
but its the skip behind that I'll think aboot in the next few

Bathed in darkness and blue light from the monitor,
I realized I loved you,
danced with the black and integrated in ink,
I realized I loved you,
it wasnt until tonight when I say on my bed,
I realized I loved you,
when I held my breath during every pause,
I realized I loved you,
you are far away, but I watch the moon as you do and at that moment,
I realized I loved you,
I wanted to say it to you but the words slink and slide like my tongue has turned to sand,
I realized I loved you,
holding hands with my own fate and accepting the fact it happened,
I realized I loved you,
and I am alright with that.

I would have spoken louder,
But I was too ashamed.
In the car I thought about,
Maybe,
The darkest sky,
And leaking shiny puncture wounds.
The biggest blanket,
For everyone.
I could have fallen asleep,
In the shape of the infinity symbol.
Arms looped around,
The water called 'myself'.
Your arms,
Forever.
But my body language was too harsh.
My toes were pointed towards,
Frosty window sheets,
And fractal images,
Of smiles,
Much too critical,
Looseness,
Made by boulders held with dental floss.
There was cold space,
Where little iron flowers grew,
With spiraled silver pedals.
Carving chicken wire,
And leaves of serrated razor.
I thought twice to mention,
While passing stagnant park benches,
Off highways,
Where quacking mesh motor engines,
Distress,
Until the only want,
Is want,
And desire's,
Buttoned up.

As each second rises to the sky
I pause
I stop breathing
so that I can hear your heart

then, I refrain from blinking
just so that I won't miss your sweat sprouting as wild flowers after summer rain
I want to witness the ****** expressions you make
as you reach the mountain top
while clasping against my skin, my face

I pause
as you break through my flesh
as you scratch and caress
as you bite
as you call me “papi”
Papi...I pause

and I taste all your flavors
and I lick, and I devour your thighs
we become dark as night
lost in the fire at dusk
as the sun chases us...
I pause... to feel your lips again... pressed against mine... before you walk away... I pause.

She slumps in sleep
Paws clasped prayer-like
Dream-dozing eyelids a-simmer

A spasm-triggered flesh flick
An ear-alert to a tremorous tick
Crisp-dry nose with involuntary sniff
Old dog breath brewing brown toothed whiff

With pain weary grunt
She heaves her lumpy bulk
Onto shaky splayed legs
That hobble and limp

Catches my eye
With a puppy-pleased glint

Wags

.... and pees