There’s so much that I can’t begin to say.

Sometimes I feel like I am doing everyone a great disservice just by being alive
When I reflect on this I feel almost narcissistic
My existence is not that impactful
All of these thoughts bring me an inner grief
As I would not say these things towards another person
I want to filter my inner monologue
My thoughts can almost bring me to tears when I am trying to focus on a present task at hand
Ruminations of misery come over me at random
I want to be emotionally well

The blinds are cracked just enough
For a sliver of the streetlight
To illuminate your empty side of the bed
You’re not that far but the stairway
Leads to rejection
The air conditioner muffles my sighs
But the silence is interrupted by the sporadic chirping of the smoke detector that’s batteries are dying.
The sound is reminiscent to a canary in a coal mine.

I can’t just undo the damage done in a day
The lord giveth and the lord taketh away
Should the winds shift and leave me penniless
I’ll wait, but I’m accountable for every mistake
Even if there is nothing to account for per se

Hello Poetry 👋
I welcome you with love ❤️
With acceptance 🖐 🤚
With joy 😊
With peace 🧘
With hope 🗽
With gratitude 🙏