Overwhelmed
by stormy days.
No one els but I
Can take these storms away.
My choice to live
In misery & darkness.
How hard can it be?
To rise & Shine light
On my Depressed life ?.

Been in these shadows
For Almost a decade .
Hidden from the world,
Burrowing myself
In sorrow & Hopelessness.

I’m tired .
Waking up to the
Same **** every day ..
Life is passing me by,
Missing out in so much .

Caved in for long .
Anguished in my own agony.


How much longer

I’ve let the whispers
Of the demons in my head
Turn into comforting melodies
Turn into irresistible desires
They tell me how good
The sin could make me feel
Convince me of solutions
That shouldn’t be options
I let them taunt me
Twist my thoughts around
But in a moment
I am reminded who the enemy is
The demons are not on my side
No matter what they try to offer
Even when the temptation
Sounds exquisite
I have to muster the strength
To fight for my life

Been feeling so alone.
I want to go on a zone.
but I don't want to go that far.
I don't want to feel the heavy down fall.
just want to stay above & never fall off.

Thoughts come & go.
Weight of the urge
has been heavy & heavier.
Its begun weighing down on me.

Numbs my tears
Sadness disappeared.
This soft Powder
Makes all real
Not reveal .

Numbs
in every way.
feel no Emotions
No physical pain.

Love this
Smooth soft *******

I owe myself
The biggest apology.
For putting up
With what I didn’t
deserve For so long .

My heart
Is physically hurting.
I analayzed all the possibilities
All in which made me fear.
Yes, this is real.
That time is finally here.
The final night.
I no longer want to tear.
My heart feels so heavy
My chest feels so full.
I feel this heavy weight in me.
I want it all to go away.
Tonight marks another.
My brain is in panic mode
I know the outcome of them all
While you dance in the light
I cry in the shadows

It's been difficult for me to swallow
I feel in distress
I feel so pathetic
Yet I continue to address
But they continue to do what's best
Live for them self's .

It's the final night
I can't put up with no more lies
Live your life
I don't deserve this anymore
I can't explain anymore