Get me out
of this pool
of pain and loneliness
I made up
a place as tight as my chest
with walls as high as the sky
I forgot how to swim
and water keeps filling my lungs
I forgot how to get up
drowning in the shallow water
thinking of a lifesaver
I made up
my own muscles and joints
my own breathing
I made up the pool. The swimmer
Get me out

this is a cry
this is a cry
this is a cry
this is a

parking lot. that is how big this world is. a sad space between the trees, east to a canteen, west to a badminton field. head south, there's a toilet. the way out is in the north.

we are full of cold cars and stranger's sweat. we are full of leaves, branches, fruits that fall anonymously. of raindrops, of muds that stain our clean white shoes. we are full.

come, wind. come and break the trees. come so they can wreck us into scraps.

it is no harm to the living. roots keep them alive. what does that make a human? people are abandoned, fences are mistaken as a protection. the lonely bridge. the raging river. the subject. the unidentified. everything is now an object to the eye

and it wrenches our emotion until we give them all up, of course, until we've got nothing left, of course, until breathing is solved and the lungs unravel

listen
this has been a cry all along

Where are you in the creation of your own puzzle
How many pieces have you found
And do you like the picture that is appearing
Or are you constantly rearranging
Thinking it could never fit like this

I've been at it for a while
Picking up pieces while losing others
And I don't think the holes that appear
Could ever be filled

So what meaning do I subscribe to that
How do I add it all up to see the sum of my parts
How do I make sense of a story
When the only things constant
Are change
And that from start to finish
The name it carries is one I call my own

A life made up of memories
Collections of recollections
Inhaled and expelled like breaths
Passing to the ticking of clocks
Through tunneled passages of time

Sometimes I wonder
If they become ingrained as lines
Forming adornments on the halls of history
Curving and bending
And if someone walks along them
Recounting the tale of a universe
My story a story among billions of others
Just a chapter in the grand book of life

What would it be like
To read it all in one go
To see it all unfold
Neatly in order, row by row
And have the meaning laid out for you
What then would you know

you exhaust me
in the morning
where sunlit  window is in
terrible           defense

empathy is      an open house
come on in,     patients
you've got       the front door
as sicknesses   seep to me

where
where is a friend in distress of mine?
so many people. none to love.
a body is unnecessary
don't you think? skin, flesh, bone are
too far a distance
so many interactions. none to connect to.
why would i isolate myself? that
just comes as natural
as a textbook

lover, you were seen
in the dark, galloping
toward an ending

lover, you and i
were a parrot, in the future
are AI. these lives
spiraling

down
down the consciousness
up the skies, i've seen blue
you might say, lover i've
seen it all

father, father
as you sniffed
i smelled like you

father, father
my creator
a rusty anchor

father, father
as you drift
further, further