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Butchered, it was a life,
Cut up, it was breathing,
It was a living being,
Being in this world,
With you and me.

Destined to die,
aren't we all?

Would you **** me too,
Cook me up good?
 Aug 2023 Pagan Paul
Anais Vionet
She’d been depressed at seeing how her parents had aged in just a couple of years. She hadn’t really contemplated time much before, it had seemed an endless resource.

Seeing her lying listlessly in bed, he asked “Are you ok?”
“I’m getting old,” she admitted, closing her eyes to conserve energy.
“You’re turning 20,” he stated dryly, somewhere in the darkness.
“Still,” she said, “You should know that I’ll start wrinkling, any day now, like a deflating balloon.”
“Yeah, I was afraid of that.” He said. She opened her eyes and looked at him soberly.

“You’re almost 27, are you getting crows feet?” He flinched away from her outstretching hand.
“No,” He responded confidently, but he checked his reflection in her dorm room mirror.
“Soon, your libido will flag,” she informed him solemnly, taking his hand for comfort.
He slipped off the bed and gently closed the bedroom door with a casual swipe of his hand.
“You should start eating fiber,” she gasped, “and retirement planning!”

“I’ve got a few good months left..” he said, as he came back to the bed and started unbuttoning the top of her yellow dress, “I might need someone, in the medical field, to keep an eye on me.”
“I could do that,” she smiled, as his button work progressed, “I do need more clinical hours.”
Mister,
You are falling apart
And whatever drug prescribed to you
Is pulling the seams even faster
Because you don’t take it like you’re supposed to
high buildings
prisons without barbed wire

down the street from the funeral home
across from the burnt down church
shadows scatter
like crazy crows
through streets that need no names

on the corner
illuminated by a streetlight
a heart is being spray painted on the wall
of an abandon building
a boy with a doubtful future
has a heart that is beating

we all start out that way
we start out innocent
we start out pure

i've had a few,
genuine and untainted

i've had a few PURE MOMENTS

when **** goes down
i imagine one of those
PURE MOMENTS

maybe you've had one?
maybe a few?

the boy is having one
and he doesn't
know it

it's only when
the **** goes down
that you need one
when **** goes down
and you are pacing around
the 4 corners
of that darkening room
you need one

i open the window

the boy turns
looks up at me
and smiles
and crystal clear like water in a brook

A PURE MOMENT
 Aug 2023 Pagan Paul
Rai
Some Nights
 Aug 2023 Pagan Paul
Rai
Some nights are so dark
That I can not see myself
I can not feel
I know I’m loved
But don’t know why the void inside my chest is expanding like a black hole
Life gets ****** in and through but nothing stays
There is no light
No stars to hang above my bed
In dream time I feel as though I’m falling
Another man would give in,
but I am not that man and the darkness laughs at my inability to see through this moment.
This moment and the next
This day drags and now I get no solace in sleep
For my mind is reeling
My synapses charging
My thoughts are racing
Yet I cry my tears then shrug it off again
My darkness matters to no one
No one sees me
No one hears me
I am and I feel so small
A mere particle of dust
An atom amongst atoms
I must come to realise that this silence is of my own creating
I must want this
I must need this
For the healing happens when we are stretched
When we are torn
I am opening my heart
And that’s painful
And lonely at times.
Zephyr winds, playing a symphony of love on my reddened cheeks.  
Every strand of hair is a silk ribbon of fresh dancing in the breeze
This beautiful Countryside brings me to my knees, on this exceptional, wonderful month of September.
With the breeze in my hair and a saffron sun shining,
I sit in harmony with  rhythmic songs of Autumn.
Feeling the need to act like an adventurous child, I stop on the roadside to climb an old wooden fence.  The apple orchard tempts me to help myself,
so I do, biting into a juicy apple savoring it, for all its flavor.
I recall my grandmother well, in her small kitchen baking apple pies
as the scent of baked apple and brown sugar grazed my senses
I learned the meaning of, "Nature tells no lies"
It was a fruit explosion of Autumn delight, there to wet my appetite
A light wind carries me away once again, to grandfather's apple orchard
where his smile was as bright as the coral reefs in fall
oh I tell you, those Autumns were fantastic, back when I was
only five feet tall.
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