Each year
We get a little older
Some might say
"More mature"
"More grown"
"Bigger"
But that's not it
We celebrate so much now
This day seems normal
The biggest day of our lives
Our Birthdays
Seem normal
We party to much
and care too little
We celebrate
getting closer to death
almost meeting death
and finally
meeting death
So much celebration for one day

Until its all fine
I'll sit in silence and die
and when you decide to come back
maybe it won't as bad
Until its all fine
I'll just try not to cry
and when you see me
Please don't worry
Until it's all fine
I'll say I'm alright
Until all the pains all gone
I'll hide it all like I've done before
Until it's all fine
You won't see my cryin
Cause I'll try to hide the pain
Until it's all fine
I'll act like I'm blind
So I don't see the pain
Until it's all fine

With tears in her eyes she said
"I'm fine"
As she broke more
she said
"I'm fine"
She grabbed the tape and tried to fix herself
And as she cried she screamed
"I'm fine"
But she knew it was a lie
And as the tears fell from her eyes
She realized, she was no longer
fine

We wake up
For disappointment
We fall asleep
From disappointment
The world is full of pain
of tears
of hateful things

I used to smile
I used to laugh
And
I used to love
Now the only thing I feel is pain
I can't smile
I can't laugh
But I can cry
And
I'm ready to give up
I'm ready to let it all go
Why...? They ask but never listen
Why...? You don't really care
Why...? Because I've been through bad times
I've been to hell and back
Now
I can't stand anymore
But
It doesn't matter
Because
No one sees my suffering
So no one can help

Behind our masks
Who no one knows
Is where our true selves go
Behind our masks
Is where our tears fall fast
Where the sun doesn’t shine
Behind our masks

Each night
she cried
and feared herself
Each night
she worried
and felt empty
But Each morning
she woke up
with a smile
Each morning
she pulled herself together
Until
She couldn't
and Each morning was like Each night
hopeless

Why are the things we need most a "luxury"
What we need shouldn't be a present
Cars that are good for our world?
A luxury
Biodegradable everyday tools?
Luxury
Feminine products?
Luxury
We talk of saving the world
But make the tools hard to get
Its expensive
Its a luxury
Its hard to save our world if we can't afford the tools

You reach a point
Where you look at yourself and give up
Where you realize that everything feels like nothing
And that there is no point
You realize that nothing is fine
But you act like it is
You reach a point where you’re ready to give up
Ready to leave
To disappear
To say goodbye

I hate that everyday you remind me of my shame
Remind me of who I'm not meant to be
Remind why i shouldn’t stay

I hate that I’m still here
And
I hate that I’ve survived

“Well maybe I can go another day and I’ll be fine”
It's what I tell myself
“I’ll be fine”
“Your strong”
But then I look in the mirror and I see exactly what's wrong
I see that I’m broken
I’m not fine
I’m not okay
I can’t handle this pain
Going through it everyday
It hurts me in more ways than I can say
And I really don’t know why I’m still here
Or what this is about
All I know is I’m broken
And I don't deserve this help
I don't deserve this love
I don't deserve anyone

And I don’t know where to go
And I don't know what to do
And I don't know what to say
But it hurts everyday too

I hear it in my voice and see it in my eyes
But no one can tell because I’ve gotten good at the element of surprise
I’ve gotten good at hiding it everyday

But no one looks at me the same
Because maybe they know I’m broken
But they don’t know what to do
And they can’t help me at all  
Because I’m ******* over to

Feeling this pain
It doesn't hurt anymore
Because I've felt it too long
Feeling this pain
It lasts forever
Never lets me go
Because I've had it too long
Feeling this pain
Is an everyday thing
Nothing new
Because it's always here

You make me wonder
make me think
If I am worth enough
If I matter
You make me wonder
If I belong

I want to run away
I want to hide away at least one day
I want someone to look at me and
I want someone to say “you’re not okay”
I want someone to tell me its fine
To feel these things inside my mind

Tears
Are like
Raindrops
They start slow
Then pour out fast
Always uncontrollable
Why is there no warning to
A mental storm? Why do tears
Fall randomly? With no reason?
Tears Are like Raindrops Everyday
You never know how hard they’ll
Fall. Or how fast they’ll become
All you know is you’re hurt
And you can’t save
Yourself