i'm sorry i hid,
but seeing you would have meant saying
goodbye all over again,
and i wanted to keep your last words to me
'i love you too'

i will wade out
                        till my thighs are steeped in burning flowers
I will take the sun in my mouth
and leap into the ripe air
                                       Alive
                                                 with closed eyes
to dash against darkness
                                       in the sleeping curves of my body
Shall enter fingers of smooth mastery
with chasteness of sea-girls
                                            Will i complete the mystery
                                            of my flesh
I will rise
               After a thousand years
lipping
flowers
             And set my teeth in the silver of the moon

i was tired of feeling so much
bigger on the inside,
       so instead of letting myself free
       i just poured myself out

(and what a shame, i ended up
a puddle instead of an ocean)

i know that we all break in different
ways (and who am i to talk?) but
i thought you were stronger than that.

i'm sorry,
some things just don't
change-

(you could tell me
you still love me
one thousand times
and it wouldn't
make a difference;
i started tracing
his name into
the margins of my
school papers long
before you were
gone)

maybe it's time we just
forget

sometimes i wonder if
kacie would be happier if
she didn't smoke, or
if that is the very thing that
holds her together

(judging by the way she is
now, i suppose i'll never
really know)

do they sell emotions
in teapots by the street
i'll take the blue and white one
checkered like a dorothy dress-

could i buy emotions
to pour them out in porcelain
what's the cost? a penny apiece
for the teapots by the street-

drink them up, for an hour
maybe i'd feel love
recipt, madam? yes please
i'll take my penny-bought tea-

i would buy emotions
in teapots by the street
here you are, love- take it please
one less teapot by the street