my roses
are dead
and my voilets
never grew

because smiling and saying i'm fine
is easier than trying to explain to you what i feel inside
this is why i'd rather lie
than try to explain why i wish i had died

i'm so blunt
you could smoke
my truth.

H - E
E - A
A - R
R - T
T - H

if i knew then that i'd be this lonely
i
never
would've
left
you
this loneliness is killing me slowly
ripping my fragile heart
into a million pieces

your memory  
is
now
my enemy

i cry all night
but smile all day
i drink to take the pain away
i smoke my lungs black
and contemplate
throwing myself off a building
wouldn't that be great?

i sit and think...
is my life even worth living?
how can it be if its so unfulfilling
i contemplate and take another drag
and think about how i'm just another ***
how i'll always be alone
and how i want my life to be over and done.

i think about loneliness
and how it makes me feel
i think about the times i spent
thinking love was real
i think i want to give up
i don't want to live it up