you lose somebody only once
and spend a lifetime trying to restore
but once they're gone, forever lost they are
but wounds will heal,
and soul will hurt no more.

I am tired and nearly forgotten
I look fresh but my insides are rotten.
I am fading away like the smoke
Disappearing like time
Unlike you I am broke

I am sleepy im nearly down under
Buried as if Im supposed to be
I am light I am heavy addictive
Though you seem to be immune to me

the thing is that i like you more than others;
you make me feel so safe
one of my brothers.
the deal is, i will always be a little bit too crazy
my speech will sometimes flow, sometimes seem lazy.
my eyes will shine one day
the next- be flooded;
sometimes my nod' s a yes
or for no i will nod and
there's nothing you can do to change my figure
for i am not a fan of bitter tastes;
there's little you can do to leave me saddened
and there's no way to erase my mistakes.

you are the best thing that has happened to my soul.
you are the strength i needed most when all went wrong
and now when i am back on track and can stand firmly on the ground
you're found.

you are the best thing that has happened to my heart.
you are the power that keeps pumping across my entire body
blood.

you are the best thing that has happened to my all
you are the air i breathe, the dreams i dream, my soil.

you are the worst thing that has happened to my sanity.
because of you, it's long gone down the drain
there goes the gravity.

Wrong touch
In the wrong place
Wrong speed wrong pace
Noone is coming tonight

Your chest
Unfressed
Clothes ripped
Jeans unzipped
But noone is coming tonight

Your hair
A mess
Nothing is left
Of my new dress
Why the hell none are coming tonight

I tried
To pull
You agreed
Were in my pool
But I cant be coming tonight

Soft Kiss
Gentle hiss
You did well
But I couldnt tell
When you went inside
Didnt. Feel right.

My bed
Undone
Broken frame
And wasted time
I dont think we are coming tonight

Should have called
Someone else tonight
Lonely still,
But youre by my side
Why cant I be coming tonight

Your friend
Made me confused
I nearly came
When he introduced
Me to you
But im not coming tonight

Versio:

I thought this day
Would end in the best possible way
I hoped
You would rip my clothes
Take ne to the skies
Show me where all joy
And satusfaction lies


Your hands were too rough
And you laughed when o mentioned love
When I kneeled you looked upset
Through the whole thing you were looking left
The tv was on
And you felt no shame
Watching two broke girls on their way to face
And at that point..

something great is about to happen
something terrible will then proceed
something about to take me higher
and then drop me right back on my feet.

it hurts it hurts oh god it hurts
it cuts it chops it bleeds stabs through
it drags it drains it takes it all
oh god it hurts it hurts it hurts.

it hurts so much im better off dead
it hurts it hurts it hurts.

You know how sometimes it can be enough
To lower your eyes when you smile
For friends to call your bluff
For Shaking hands to open up your soul
Expose your secrets, cut wounds to the core

Beware! My mind screamed mutely
My weakened knees were Shaking when you called
Yellow leaves in slow motion were flaring
So uncovered I felt and so bald.

It keeps hold of your heart
And everything becomes unclear
Your thoughts seem tangled up
Courage drowns in deep fear.

The blood stops flowing through
Your veins
Mind overflows.
Too much is going on
But noone knows
Noone can notice what seems to be universe size big to thee
No body hears the loud screams whispers
Voices
Where you find pain
The rest rejoices

leave it, leave it be
let it sting your soul
set it, set it free
bury in the soil.

amplify your pain
simplify your life
let it, let it be
bleed hard when you dive.

be scared, unprepared.
worry, panic, brood.
be misunderstood.

patch your deep old wounds
then cut them open deeper
pierce your skin, my sleeper,
break free from your roots .

you will always be everything.
you will always be anything
and i'll never see better things
unless you are right here
next to me.

i will never be
better than i am
unless you are here
laying next to me.

blossom never will
as im laying still
in the grave i'd dug
so high on your love

if love is what you're looking for
then look no farther
than your own family: mother, your father.

If luck is what you're seeking,
stop and be,
luck cant be found, developed,
luck is thee.

If sound is what you need
then stop and listen
to this world's gentle, soft and calming whisper.

Saw the light glowing
Thought I was drowning
Reached out to grab it
But captured the air
Saw you were watching
Your lips were moving
No words were spoken
I  wouldn't dare.

Stuck in the middle
Distance is growing
Cold lifeless full stops
Fill up your lungs.
Heartless you stop and
Shapeless Im begging
Forgiveness is something
You haven't seen once.

Be everything you want to be
When tides rise high
Be everything and more
Be thee.


Do everything you want to do and more
Do what makes your heart beat thousand times faster
And skin crawl.

Forget about the bad about the sad
Remember only good, be joyful, glad
There comes the time
We get stuck in a heartless, biting slumber
But it's only a day, drop in an ocean, number.

this could be a song
and could be a movie.
i could be bright and sunny
or pitch black sad and gloomy
they could be notes and ties
truth could always be lies
definitions could be
mine is you, yours is me.
world could turn upside down
world could stop and stay still
everything could be different
i could be made of steel.

Just take a deep breath
let it, let it go
don't rap it, sing it, live it
do it slow

will you be mine or will i suffer still;
will you be in me, i won't rest my soul until
I get my hands on  you, on all you love
i m standing still looking at you like angel from above.

Will ever you be mine i wonder here
do i make you feel way you make me feel?
do i make you as nervous and excited
startled before the choice, glad and

will you be ever mine and not bring the bad with you
will you make me the happiest of all
im thinking looking hungrily at you
my sweet and slightly sour sausage roll

all i need is a bit inspiration
but where do i find one when i look?
i source rhymes from my lone desperation
i look for what you left and what took.
on my plate there is little of hopeful
there is not much of happy or full.
there is plenty of lonely,, deceitful
i cant tell when i stopped being a fool.
all i need is a bit self destruction
and i only achieve such by trying
to love myself without no distractions
i succeed when i rot and lie crying.
Push yourself over limit and failure
get back on your feet, if needed - knees.
Brush and shake off the horrible feeling
like you're nothing, inspire and breathe.
I think i have found my inspiration
finally i know what i want to say
let out all so long bottled frustration
aim to give, there is nothing to gain.

this is a very lonely world
we're born alone and  lone we're learnt
we're bred alone
alone we live
we search alone
the ground beneath.
alone we pray, alone believe
alone we stay alone we leave.
a single person you and i
one match, one candle, single eye.
this is a very lonely world
for those who hope to say right words
we grow old lonely
in the aftermath
we are still single soldiers
walking different paths.

your friends wont remember
your name in a day
your parents will live on
a niddle in stock of hay.

my love turned into dust
my heart is coal
i shook the world off me
and grabbed the soil
i ran to keep the earth moving and spinning
the end of this was end of my beginning.
pathetic
hear me?
i speak words of truth
pathetic
you with ugly useless youth.
with time the beauty fades
your mind comes reeling
so when you run to contribute to the earth spinning
you will be thrown off into space
forgotten
love turned to dust
heart black, hard,
and bones rotten.

you leave no shadow on the wall;
there's no reflection in the mirror.
i wonder if you're there at all
to make my pain seem real, fear- clearer.

you leave no trace of being around,
no visual no scent or sound;
no touch, no feeling, no restrain.
you left no mercy and no blame

you let me down
you let me fall
i still reach for you
after all.
i think of what's happened
nothing's ever been right
but heart keeps the war up and against you
but my soul keeps on winning the fight.

i searched for what i craved the most;
i thought i'd had it before lost.
i tried the sea, i searched the earth
i looked elsewhere no bliss just curse.

I looked under pillows, and deep in the sands
i dived deep into waters of unfulfilled plans;
i wondered round woods though dense, scary nights
i searched for what i could't find in his eyes.

"love" all i was craving.
it was all that i needed.
all i waited, i wanted
i prayed for and seeded.
i watered and cared for
cherished, protected.
i cuddled and held
not to break, but to save it.

for all i know your time has come;
the light has taken over ways of your mere charm
the sky above has fallen down on hell
and what you loved echoes in sounds created by the bell
under glass cover we all live, unbothered
our souls are shut, but shirts are wide, unbuttoned;
you take a step into the world of mine
you hop and hope you leave me none of time.
my heart in seizure, scattered on the ground
i go through motions til i m breaking down.

will you be my silence?
will you be my rope?
that i'd hold on to so tightly  
as i let go of hope.

will you be my nightmare?
wake me up from good dreams;
will you be my last drag
before i seize to exist.

i want you to replace
all the good and the bad
i want you to take place
of what i have and what had.
i want you to be the air,
i want you to be the sun
the only voice i can hear
when i can hear no more sound.
the only touch i react to
when flesh come off of my bones
and be the darkness i enter
as i fall deeper in love.

what if i loved you a little bit more?
if I blocked all ways in
but gave you key to main door;
what if my heart beat a little bit faster?
would i slow down the time
'fore inadvertent disaster?

What if my hand was a bit closer to yours
what if my ships came to your abandoned shores;
what if i travelled every day hundred miles
through the mountains and oceans
passing cages with lions;
would you love me a little,
would you love me some more?
if i broke all my bones
would you love me at all?

It's like when someone stabs you over and over.
It's like you're being left daily by your perfect lover
It's like you are drowning but people are watching
It's like you've been chained to the air, the doors latched, and
The world seems so small
But your dreams are so big
And this constant sharp pain
Makes you tastelessly weak.
You lay there, heart in seizures
No one noticed a thing
you cry: it's so obvious
what you carry within.

you are my paper-cut
wound that wont heal;
you are the water in my lungs
my Achilles' heel.

around my neck- tight noose;
my quiet self abuse;
my lucid dream-
my silent scream;
and faulty safety fuse.